August 20 – Cactus Kicker

Posted on August 20, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

I’m With Stupid

Kicking a cactus would be a pretty stupid thing to do… but I’m no stranger to stupid! Here are some of the wicked awesome things I’ve done that most would construe as stupid:

Balcony Jumper, Extraordinaire

After a full day of poolside boozing, I stepped inside to order the Sip Alliance some pizzas (and Mrs. Sip some Indian food – she always has to be the difficult one). After re-emerging from the house I spotted a challenge I’d always wanted to tackle and never taken the chance. I quickly hopped up onto the ledge of the balcony that overlooks our pool, let out a manly growl, and cleared several feet of concrete leaping into the pool below.

Things went off without a hitch… until Cousin Sip posted a Facebook status about it, prompting Ma Sip to reply in a not-so-thrilled manner. Mrs. Sip, while impressed with the feat, wasn’t very happy with me either. She made me vow never to perform the death-defying jump again. When the two most important women in your life aren’t happy with you, you know you’ve done something wrong. I promised that evening that my balcony jumping days were a thing of the past… but no one ever said the roof was off limits!

You Win Some, You LUGE Some

The more you speed, the more you bleed! That was the local motto when Mrs. Sip and I took to the Commercial Street Luge track in Rotorua, New Zealand. We’re both speed demons, but Mrs. Sip wanted to ease herself into the luging, starting with the beginner track and working her way up through intermediate and expert. I jumped straight to intermediate and after one warm-up run, I was flying down the expert course with ease. This would make a spectacular video, I thought, as I finished up my second of three runs.

On our third run, we both hit the expert track, with Mrs. Sip leading the way. Since I was such an expert, or so I thought, I was in charge of filming the track. I started rolling tape, but steering and holding the camera at the same time was proving difficult. Rather than bail on my glorious plan, I tried to make it work. Then I got to the point in the track where there was a sharp turn and a steep drop where usually you gain a bit of air. Before I knew it, I was veering towards the concrete curb, launching myself out of my vehicle and onto the thankfully grassy embankment.

Sadly, this is not how Mrs. Sip treated my numerous boo-boos…

My shirt was stained with dirt and grass, my arm sliced open and bleeding, and our camera worse for the wear, and my watch scuffed. Mrs. Sip was waiting at the bottom of the course wondering why I was taking so long to finish and thinking she had beaten me handily and was a born-speedster. As I finally finished my run, she could sense something was wrong. Luckily the sorest thing was my pride and it ended up making a decent story.

Double-O-Stupid

My 19^th birthday was a mix of good and bad. On the plus side, I was now legal age to drink alcohol. Not a huge deal because I’d been drinking for a few years by that point, but it would make procuring liquor easier. On the downside, Mrs. Sip and my relationship was only six months old and she had recently left for the United Kingdom for a year-long exchange program.

I decided to celebrate quietly with a couple friends and in a moment of nostalgia, we made plans to play the classic James Bond video game Goldeneye (much like we had done together in our formative years). The one caveat: each time you were killed, you had to do a shot of whiskey.

I have no clue why I ever agreed to this idea… I was never that great at the video game to begin with. It wasn’t long before I was running to the sink to lose my milk and cookies and my buddies weren’t far behind. Here’s where the Sip Advisor legend began to grow though… I went back to doing shots. Not many folks can get drunk twice in the same night!

Speed Trap Follies

I’ve only been pulled over for speeding once in my 14-year driving history. I think that’s a pretty damn good record. During the one time I wasn’t so lucky, I had just returned Mrs. Sip to her university residence and had a 30-45 minute drive in front of me to get back home. Given it was already 3am and I had school myself in the morning, I was looking to make short work of the trip. I had just hit about 30 kilometers above the speed limit, on a road I knew to be a trap for police, when I spotted a cop car ahead. I tried to slow down, but I was already busted.

The officer took my license and registration and asked me a couple questions, which mortified, I answered. As a struggling student, I surely didn’t need to be paying off a hefty speeding ticket. When the patrolman returned, he handed me back my papers and license and revealed that he was going to let me off with a warning. His parting words: “By the way, happy birthday!”

Drink #232: Cactus Kicker

1.5 oz Tequila (I used Hornitos)
0.5 oz Melon Liqueur
Top with Pineapple Juice
Splash of Sour Mix
Splash of Lemon-Lime Soda
Garnish with a Lime Wedge

What stupid things have you done, perhaps after a few too many beverages? Surely, I can’t be the only dumb person around here. Or maybe that’s what makes me a legend!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
This cocktail is like a twist on the margarita. While I enjoyed most of the ingredients, I wasn’t very fond of the Pineapple Juice. When it became a little more diluted I enjoyed the drink more.

August 19 – Mint Julep

Posted on August 19, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

N’Awlins

We’ve travelled to many lands far and wide, but today we venture into the deepest, darkest parts of… New Orleans! Throw on your beads and mask cause things are about to get cray-cray around here. How crazy you ask? We’re talking take an episode of True Blood and turn it up to 11 crazy!

Eat Amazing Food

Alligator, gumbo, po-boy (sandwich stuffed with oysters and shrimp), crayfish… you name it, you can probably find it among N’Orleans eclectic restaurants. The place is also famous for hot sauces, so make sure to pick up a couple bottles that will make steam shoot out of your friend’s heads. Remember, chef Emeril Lagasse was heavily influenced by the New Orleans style, so it must be good. BAM!

Not true little Po, I love you lots!

Plantation Tour

On these tours, you will see some beautiful landscapes, wonderful architecture and learn the amazing history of the families that built and owned the properties. Perhaps you’ll even pick up on some of the Cajun/Creole ways and language or sit back and enjoy some fresh squeezed lemonade as you rock back and forth, fanning yourself, and complaining of the intolerable heat.

Live Music

Home to the birth of Jazz, as well as perhaps the most famous musician to ever scat, Louis Armstrong, you can bet any visit to ‘The Big Easy’ would be highlighted by live music performed in any of the city’s hottest venues. There is even jazz concerts at funerals in these parts. Visitors can also choose from a number of annual festivals to get their groove on, including the Jazz and Heritage Festival, Bayou Boogaloo, and Satchmo SummerFest. Or they can stroll down to venues such as Preservation Hall, to catch some of the top jazz musicians our time.

Show Your $&%@^#*

Even if you’re not there at Mardi Gras, there’s nothing wrong with flashing some skin… you might even be rewarded with beads, providing you got curves like Mrs. Sip! If you get taken away in cuffs, never fear, that’s just part of the foreplay! Apparently, nudity can be exchanged for other “trinkets” as well. While I wonder if the trinkets would have any value whatsoever, I’m up for some scientific investigation!

Air Boat Adventure

A favourite activity of one Sterling Archer, thanks to his obsession with Burt Reynolds and the movie Gator, these tours take guests through the waters outside the city, where they can view wildlife such as alligators, snakes, turtles, and a number of species of birds. If you want to take things at a slower pace, you can take a slower swamp boat tour or even a Mississippi River steamboat.

A Trip through History

For the history buffs out there, New Orleans provides a number of outlets to get your learning on. There’s Jackson Square (named after President Andrew Jackson), the site of the Battle of New Orleans during the Civil War, and the World War II Museum, among others. N’Orleans was founded in 1718, so that has given the place plenty of time to become marinated with history.

Bourbon Street Pub Crawl

It would fulfill a dream of mine to have a Mint Julep (today’s feature drink) at a Bourbon Street bar. New Orleans is also responsible for a number of other cocktail inventions, such as the Sazerac, the Obituary Cocktail, and the Ramos Gin Fizz. Joints like The Old Absinthe House and Lafitte’s Blacksmith Shop will have you throwing your doubloons around until the wee hours of the morning. Best of all, public drinking is allowed (if not encouraged) in the quarter.

Cemeteries and Haunted Tours

In New Orleans, bodies are buried in above ground graves and tombs because of the high water table and increased probability of flooding. That, coupled with the city’s long history, including activity in the Civil War, and prevalence of occult culture (voodoo, etc.), makes for an interesting tour. The original Haunted Mansion at Disneyland was based on a New Orleans style antebellum home, so surely the real thing would be just as creepy!

Sports

I have a soft spot in my heart for the New Orleans sports scene, given that they’ve lost as many teams as my hometown of Vancouver and seem to always be looking over their shoulder as franchises threaten relocation. Your options consist of the Saints (NFL) and Pelicans (NBA) on the professional level, but there is also a myriad of college action to choose from in a variety of disciplines.

Drink #231: Mint Julep

Muddle Mint Leaves
2 oz Bourbon (I used Jim Beam)
2 tsp Turbinado Simple Syrup
Garnish with Mint Sprig

I’ve only been to New Orleans once when I was 13, so I’m due for a return trip when I can actually get into bars. Mrs. Sip is there right this very minute and having a great time… lucky girl!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
This is a slow sipper drink thanks to the high concentration of liquor and really no mixers, other than Simple Syrup. My choice of Black Cherry Bourbon was nice for a unique flavour on the spirit side of things.

August 18 – Sunday Snuggie

Posted on August 18, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Putrid Products

I love commercials for “As Seen on TV” products. The acting is hokey and the products range from ridiculous to utterly useless. Here are some of the craziest items, past and present, which will require shipping and handling:

Snuggies

I think what bugs me the most about Snuggies is that the commercial makes everyone look like a giant blanket-wrapped dork. While I’m not opposed to blankets, I would never be caught wearing one at tailgating parties, the theatre, sporting events, or anywhere inhabited by people or penguins. What’s next, the pillow hat? You can wear it when you want to take that quick cat nap on the train, at a park, or during those endless office meetings! Hmmm…maybe I’m on to something!?

Zoomies

These binoculars-on-the-go are both practical and the height of modern fashion… said no one ever (throw on a bright blue Snuggie while you’re at it and then you’ll look real bad ass… or like The Tick, whateves). The thing the makers don’t really point out is that Zoomies only let you focus on one particular spot in the distance. The commercial acts as if your entire vision will be enhanced.

Tush Turner

This swivel seat allows you to spin in a chair, thus eliminating even the most simple of torso movements. I’ve seen this product hilariously described as a Lazy Susan for your ass. You know eventually there will be a Guinness World Record for fastest Tush Turner or most Tush Turns in an hour.

Cami Secret

These commercials are classic for the awesome portrayals of they dying art of sexual harassment. I deplore this product, however, because it covers up women’s breasts. Don’t listen ladies, be loud, be proud, and flaunt your assets!

Kush Support

Speaking of sexual harassment, this allows women to maintain their cleavage while sleeping on their side. Brilliant, I say! I have often turned to Mrs. Sip while she is deep in dreamland and thought, ‘Man, I wish she had more cleavage right now.’ For those keeping score, that was a joke!

Booty Pop

While most women are trying to eliminate the junk in their trunk, the Booty Pop will provide all the vroom-vroom anyone could ever want. These butt-enhancers fill a back pocket in a similar vein to stuffing a bra, except it’s your backside. I say put a couple Pizza Pops in there and you have a quick lunch, too!

Better Marriage Blanket

So, the gimmick behind this little gem is that it absorbs the odor of farts so your wife (or maybe it’s the other way around) will never know you’ve been cooking under a Dutch oven all these years. I think the name is totally classic. If flatulence is a major concern for your relationship, then you’re in for a rough ride once kids come along!

Fanny Bank

In complete contrast to the Better Marriage Blanket, this piggy bank rewards you with a ripping fart upon making a deposit. I wonder if the fart gets louder with the more cash you shove into the butt crack opening… scratch that, I don’t ever want to know. Who makes this crap!?

The Backup

I know I’ve always wanted to have a gun rack located not directly beside my bed, not directly behind my bed but actually IN my bed. Luckily now I have been afforded that opportunity with The Backup, a gun rack that slides between your bed’s box spring and mattress. Now I just need a gun for my rack. The fact that a product like this even made it to air, tells us something quite disturbing about society. Even scarier, it’s probably a best seller.

UroClub

This ingenious device allows dudes to hold their real putter whenever they want on a golf course. It comes complete with retractable curtains, so you can relieve yourself in privacy, while your buddies merciless chirp you. There are other portable urinal products, begging the question, when will someone step up and seize the women’s potty-on-the-go market!?

SlobStopper

This giant bib for eating and drinking while driving surely has to be some kind of joke. How many stories are there of people spilling scalding hot coffee on themselves? However, this product won’t stop you from receiving third degree burns. Here’s a suggestion, maybe just don’t eat and drink while on the road.

Pajama Jeans

These pajamas are designed to make it appears as if you’re wearing jeans. Can you imagine actually wearing these out to a lounge or nightclub and impressing ANYONE!? These PJs give a whole new meaning to casual Friday at the office. Now all they need to do is design pajamas that look like dress pants and the corporate world will fall to the slackers!

Drink #230: Sunday Snuggie

2 oz Jagermeister
2 oz Bourbon
Top with Sweet & Sour Mix
Dash of Grenadine
Splash of Cranberry Juice
Garnish with a Lime Wheel and a Maraschino Cherry

I’d love to order some of these items, just to see how well they actually work. I bet some of them would just be too ludicrous to own, but at least they might make great gag gifts.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
The drink was pretty potent thanks to the Jagermeister and Bourbon. I used Black Cherry Bourbon to add an interesting twist to the cocktail and the results were as awesome as expected. This was quite the recipe to put together, but totally worth it.

August 17 – Jell-O Shot

Posted on August 17, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Celebrity Endorsement

Much like Bill Cosby has been the face of Jell-O in the past, many celebrities have lent their name and likeness to liquor products. Even 90’s boy band Hanson has been linked to a beer called MmmHop… while that seems totally ridonkulous, here are some legit spirit-celebrity relationships:

Ron Jeremy – Ron de Jeremy Rum

That’s right, the well-hung porn legend has released his own brand of Rum. Sadly, this elixir was temporarily banned from Manitoba, Canada liquor store shelves, despite no objectionable writing or images on the label, just solely based on Jeremy’s former career. I expect better of my country!

Dan Aykroyd – Crystal Head Vodka

You’d expect the likes of George Lucas and Steven Spielberg to support this Vodka, but instead you get funnyman Dan Aykroyd being responsible. My buddy got a bottle of this spirit for his 30th birthday and we have yet to crack it open… shame on us!

Marilyn Manson – Mansinthe

It’s a very interesting choice for a celebrity to lend their talents to an Absinthe creation, but nothing Marilyn Manson does in the world of business and entertainment could be considered normal. This Absinthe blend does in fact contain the hallucinogenic wormwood, which has me very intrigued.

Donald Trump – Trump Vodka

Unfortunately, The Donald’s alcohol endeavor is no more, as “the company failed to meet the threshold requirements”… whatever that means. When the liquor was released, Trump was so sure of its success that he gloated the Trump and Tonic and Trump Martini would be the next big things to hit the mixology world.

Danny DeVito – Danny DeVito Limoncello

Why Limoncello? Why not!? It goes along with DeVito’s Italian heritage, I suppose. I kind of wish DeVito had resurrected his Louie De Palma character from Taxi and released some filthy sewer water concoction, just looking to make a quick buck in this scheme.

George Clooney – Casamigos Tequila

As if George Clooney needs another thing that makes him look cool, suave, and sophisticated! This Tequila has a ton of hype built up around it, largely because of Clooney’s association with the brand. It has quickly shot up my list as a must-try. Warning: It will not make you the world’s sexiest man alive!

Justin Timberlake – 901 Tequila

As JT explains, the 901 stands for 9:01pm, when the evening ends and the night begins! The 901 moniker also doubles as the area code for the artist’s hometown of Memphis, Tennessee. Either way, it’s a clever marketing tool.

Willie Nelson – Old Whiskey River Bourbon

I’m surprised Willie Nelson’s endorsement power hasn’t been completely spent in the marijuana field (or even the tax evasion field), but here we are with a Bourbon product that bears the title of one of Willie’s classic cover tunes, ‘Whiskey River’… a song about getting blitzed on the booze.

Sammy Hagar – Cabo Wabo Tequila & Sammy’s Beach Bar Rum

The Van Halen rocker seriously likes his booze. Enough so that he started the Cabo Wabo bar chain and Tequila, later adding Sammy’s Beach Bar Rum. The Cabo Wabo Tequila is one of the few products on this list that I’ve actually tried (and enjoyed!) in Cabo San Lucas, no less!

Cee Lo Green – Ty Ku Sake

Here’s an interesting pairing. You have singer and songwriter Cee Lo Green dabbling in the Japanese traditional spirit of Sake. Whatever floats your boat, I guess. A few other celebs also have stake in this company, including gossip blogger Perez Hilton. Good company to keep…

Billy Gibbons – Pura Vida Tequila

The ZZ Top front man joins a long list of musicians who have entered the liquor game. This Premium Tequila (don’t they all advertise themselves to be that!) is surely consumed by sharply dressed men with great legs, on their way to La Grange. I wonder if Gibbons’ famous beard ever gets matted and tangled by the Pura Vida Tequila…

Bill Murray and Mikhail Baryshnikov – Slovenia Vodka

Can you imagine the board of director meetings that happen within this Vodka company, led by the odd couple of actor Bill Murray and dancer Mikhail Baryshnikov? Between the jokes and choreography, I’m willing to bet that barely any work gets done at all at these offices.

Drink #229: Jell-O Shot

1/2 Cup of Vodka/Spiced Rum/Tequila
Mix Liquors with 1/2 Cup Water and Cool in Fridge
1 Cup Water, Boiled
1 Pack of Jell-O (Watermelon, Berry Blue, Lime)

If I could have a celebrity endorsement for this site, I’d pick some of the finest alcoholics known to fame: I’m talking the Mel Gibson’s or David Hasselhoff’s of the world. As for myself, in the not-too-distant future, I will be a dot.com celeb and will have to be careful when choosing products to attach my name to. Look out for a future article regarding my selective process!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I figured Jell-O Shots had to be done at some point in this project and why not combine them with Frozen Cocktail Week, since there’s really no point in making a frozen shooter (you might as well just go ahead and entitle it Brain Freeze… light bulb!). Making Jell-O shots made me feel like a kid again… except this time I was getting ripped throughout the entire process. I want to thank Ma Sip and Cousin Sip for their help throughout the project. I decided to do three different versions of the shooters (lime with tequila, berry blue with spiced rum, and watermelon with raspberry vodka) with my favourite being the vodka-watermelon combo. I never really liked Jell-O Shots until I made them myself!

August 16 – Mexican Bulldog

Posted on August 16, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Freebie Frenzy

On my twice daily trips to the liquor store, I love seeing the little freebies that are often attached to a bottle of alcohol. They can sometimes provide the tipping point in what I choose to spend my allowance on. Here are some of the more unique items I’ve seen:

Glass Clip and Rimming Salt – Corona Beer

In homage of today’s frozen cocktail, Corona released a set that included a case of beers, a Margarita-style glass, rimming salt and a clipping device that would allow you to pop a beer bottle into your drink with little fuss or mess. Sadly, I didn’t pick up the set and am kicking myself over it ever since.

Rimming Salt – Sauza Tequila

Much like the above entry, rimming salt and Tequila go hand-in-hand. Legend has it that they were separated at birth and have been destined to walk the earth searching for one another, reuniting solely in Margaritas, Palomas, and Tequila Shooters. It is a quest worth completing.

Playing Cards – Bacardi Rum

What does every boozehound need to have on their person at all times? A deck of playing cards, of course. When the Rum is flowing and fun is needed to be had, is there a better way to find it then shuffling up some cards? You can play a myriad of games, from Strip Poker to King’s Cup and everything in between.

Coaster – Wiser’s Whiskey

The Wiser’s Whiskey advertising campaign celebrating the Society of Uncompromising Men is one of my favourites. Well, what better way to be a classy drinker than to have a travelling coaster with you at all times. The only thing that sucks about giveaways like this are you’d have to buy four bottles to have a complete set of coasters. I’m up for the challenge, though!

Phone Case – Bacardi Oakheart Spiced Rum

I’ve never actually had a phone skin or protective case. It’s called looking after your shit and not damaging it with reckless disregard. That said, if you want to sport the Bacardi Oakheart logo on your phone, all the power to you. It is a pretty wicked logo and at least now, you won’t be cracking your screen the next time you’re plastered!

Speaker – Smirnoff Vodka

I suppose the theory behind this pairing was that you could take your bottle of Vodka and speaker and create a one-man party! With no one else around, playing garbage music and ruining your funk, the good times would keep on rolling all through the night… until you blacked out in a glorious bender, that is.

Socks – Captain Morgan Spiced Rum

You may be thinking that socks are an odd item for a liquor company to be attaching to their product. And you might be right. It wasn’t even Christmas or anything. I do, however, believe there is a method to the madness here. The Captain Morgan company is simply making sure that their customers don’t get cold feet after passing out.

Cocktail Shaker – Dr. McGillicuddy’s Peach Schnapps

The last time I bought a bottle of Peach Schnapps, it came with a miniature cocktail shaker, which allowed you to make one drink at a time. Sure, it’s not a full-sized shaker, but the intent is to get you interested in mixology and playing around with Peach Schnapps, in particular. That is exactly what I did!

Bottle Light – Absolut Vodka

It’s been a dream of mine for some time now to have a full-sized man cave bar, complete with backlit shelves to highlight all the wonderful liquor I’ve purchased over the years. This device allows you to at least light up one of your bottles, letting it gleam a mesmerizing glow throughout your life, surrounding you with liquid sunshine and warmth.

Drink #228: Mexican Bulldog

Rim glass with Strawberry Sugar
2 oz PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur
2 oz Triple Sec
Splash of Lime Juice
Blend with Ice
1 Bottle of Coronita Beer
Garnish with Lime Wheel

If you’re interested in checking out my previous post on the subject of liquor freebies, you’ll find that here. Do you have a suggestion for a third post on this topic? As always, I’m waiting with bated breath!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
It’s pretty awesome to combine a delicious Margarita (the PAMA Rita is perhaps one of the best I’ve ever had) with a fresh, crisp beer! Coronita Beers were made especially for building the Mexican Bulldogs and they’re a cute little bottle of beer to have around. You have to be cautious with dunking the beer into your drink. Once we had it nestled into the drink, there was no mess to worry about, but first getting the brew in there caused some issues, particularly overflowing.

August 15 – Wicked Watermelon

Posted on August 15, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Fanatics

There are a number of ways that fans show support for their teams. Some ways make sense while others can be downright bizarre. That’s just another wrinkle in why sports are so awesome. Here are some of best fan traditions from around the globe:

What Not to Wear

Whether sporting a watermelon helmet is done to keep your head cool, for protection in the case of a brawl, or simply to have something to snack on in the middle of the game, it is by far one of the most unique fan traditions in all of sports. Of course, it takes the crazy die-hard Canadian Football League fans of Saskatchewan to pull something like this off. Known as ‘Melonheads,’ there are varying stories about how the tradition started, but I’ll let this clip try to clarify things as much as possible.

In other parts of the world, you can find the intimidating ‘Raider Nation’ backing their Oakland NFL team, the ‘C of Red’ and ‘White Out’ supporting the NHL’s Flames and Winnipeg Jets respectively, and perhaps most hilariously, ‘The Hogettes’ in Washington, D.C. These dudes-dressed-as-ladies with pig noses all began when Joe Bugel, an offensive line coach with the Washington Redskins referred to his squad as hogs in the 1980’s. From that point on, Michael Torbert and company became a fixture at Redskins games and have also raised over $100 million for charities.

Hockey Toss

It seems hockey fans love throwing items onto the ice surface. One of the longest supporter traditions sees Detroit Red Wings fans toss an octopus onto the ice. It was started in 1952 when Pete and Jerry Cusimano (owners of a Detroit fish shop) hurled one onto the ice at the start of the team’s playoff run. The eight tentacles symbolized the eight wins needed to capture the Stanley Cup at that time.

In a similar tradition, Florida Panthers fans would toss rubber rats onto the ice, following a story about player Scott Mellanby killing one in the team’s dressing room before scoring two goals that night. Due to the delays it caused, the rat toss was soon banned. Sticking with the ice, there has also been a rubber bat toss started by Buffalo Sabres fans after forward Jim Lorentz knocked a bat out of the air with his hockey stick during the 1975 Stanley Cup Finals. Lastly, the hockey-wide tradition of throwing hats on the ice following three goals by the same player (a hat trick) must be mentioned.

Wave it Proud

My hometown Vancouver Canucks has, in my humble opinion, one of the greatest traditions in the sports world. The white towel waving began when coach Roger Neilson, frustrated with the lop-sided officiating in an early 1982 playoff game, took a white towel and put it at the end of a hockey stick, signifying that he and the team had given up and surrendered to the refs control. The team and fans united around this symbol and the underdog team fought their way to the Stanley Cup Finals. The ‘Towel Power’ tradition still exists to this day.

The Pittsburgh Steelers of the NFL have their own towel gimmick, known as Terrible Towels. The difference between the two teams is that the Steelers have actually had championship success with the help of their cloths.

Sing Me a Song

While my EPL team of choice is Manchester United, videos of the Liverpool FC faithful singing “You’ll Never Walk Alone” together in unison is awe-inspiring stuff. On this side of the pond, the Seventh Inning Stretch, featuring “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” has to be the most recognized sports song on the entire continent. Perhaps most famously done by legendary voice of the Chicago Cubs, Harry Caray, but enjoyed at every baseball park around North America, even non-sports fans recognize the tune.

Chanting Up a Storm

Upon compiling my research, I realized a lot of these famous chants are New York-based. From Rangers fans screaming “Potvin Sucks,” decades after the Hall of Fame defenseman retired to Jets fans and their unmistakable “J-E-T-S” tradition, there’s a lot of bluster going around the Big Apple. The Yankees have an entire section of fans known as The Bleacher Creatures, who perform a roll call of the team’s line-up, demanding recognition from each player before going on to the next one.

The last chant that has to be mentioned comes from one of the most unlikely places: the golf course. It seems every time a player putts or even starts a hole with his or her drive, you have some guy(s) screaming “Get in the hole!” The funniest thing is that this rarely works, especially in the form of a hole-in-one, but I’ve seldom seen the feat accomplished on the green, as the golfer looks to finish up the hole. Perhaps it’s more of a jinx than anything else.

Miscellaneous Magic

At the 2010 World Cup of Soccer, fans around the world were introduced to the vuvuzela horn, which made watching the matches seem like you were living in a bee’s nest. Some loved the horns, while most couldn’t stand them. There were even folks that looked to ban the noisemaker, but come on, it was all in good fun and part of the unique party.

While the Lambeau Leap, performed by Green Bay Packers players after a touchdown is more of an athlete started tradition, it takes a sea of adoring fans to embrace the leaper and therefore they play a significant role in the tradition. Two more similar fan-based celebrations of note are the Tomahawk Chop of the Atlanta Braves and the Shark Chomp of the San Jose Sharks.

Drink #227: Wicked Watermelon (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

1.5 oz Parrot Bay Pineapple Rum
Blended Watermelon
Blended Ice
Garnish with Watermelon Ball

I should note that there were so many great options for this article, that I was forced to drop everything from college sport and focus on professional team traditions, just to narrow it down. Perhaps, I will do a follow-up post dealing specifically with the college and amateur side of things in the future.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
This drink is quite delicious and not too sweet, which is always a worry with frozen cocktails. It could probably use a little more alcohol, so you might want to up that proportion from 1.5 oz to at least 2, or use a heavier spirit… it does work well enough with the current measurement though and is quite the refreshing summer day drink!

August 14 – Death by Chocolate

Posted on August 14, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Culinary Scene Investigation

I think most people out there are lovers of food and a lot of pleasure can be gained through culinary delights. That said, that which sustains us can also kill (and I’m not even talking about the world of foodborne illness outbreaks, such as E. coli, salmonella or food poisoning). Here are some of the more interesting deaths by eats:

Chocolate Chaos

This has has to be one of the better ways to go, but it’s tragic nonetheless. Vincent Smith, Jr., an employee at the Lyons and Sons Chocolate Factory in Pennsylvania fell into a vat of boiling chocolate and then met his end courtesy of one of the mixing propellers. Augustus Gloop would be so proud! Perhaps most ironic is that this incident led to the discovery that the chocolate company did not have proper licensing in place and was distributing its products illegally.

Fugu Follies

I like to consider myself immune to poison (don’t we all), but this guy took it a little too far, challenging the limitations of the human body. Acclaimed Kabuki (that’s Kabuki, not bukkake) actor Bandō Mitsugorō VIII perished in 1975 after demanding four fugu liver orders. He insisted that he was impervious to the pufferfish’s poison, but turns out, not so much. He died after seven hours of paralysis and convulsions. Fugu was featured in The Simpsons episode One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish.

Molasses Mania

The saying “slow as molasses” took a different turn during Boston’s 1919 Molasses Disaster (I’m surprised it hasn’t been made into a summer blockbuster movie yet). The usually slow-moving syrup killed 21 and injured 150 when a tank holding 2 million gallons of the substance exploded. The great ball of molasses death was estimated to have been travelling upwards of 35 miles per hour.

Hot Dogs for Haiti

Poor Noah Akers… the 12-year-old died after choking on a wiener during a hot dog eating competition that was supposed to benefit victims of the 2010 Haiti earthquake. This is precisely why I advise people not to do any charitable work. What’s even more bizarre is that the organizers, The Boys and Girls Club, chose to hold an eating competition to raise money for people that desperately needed food supplies.

Banquet Blunder

King Adolf Frederick of Sweden ate himself to death, following a feast that included caviar, smoked herring, lobster, kippers, sauerkraut, champagne, and 14 servings of dessert (and here I feel like a glutton after two small cookies!). I guess if you’re going to leave this world, you might as well have one hell of a last meal. His has a lasting legacy, which can’t be said for other monarchs.

Carrot Juice Conundrum

Basil Brown, one of those crazy health nuts, died in 1974, at the age of 48, after ingesting 10 gallons of carrot juice over a 10-day span. That doesn’t sound too bad (actually it sounds horrible) until you realize that’s 10,000 times the recommended daily dose of vitamin A. I’m not sure what point ol’ Basil was trying to make by downing so much carrot juice. Perhaps he was trying to find a decent carrot juice cocktail, with no luck.

Cola Killer

Natasha Harris, a 30-year-old mother of eight died of a heart attack in New Zealand in 2010. After dying at such a young age, an inquiry took place and it was discovered that Harris drank upwards of two gallons of soda each day (hopefully some was used for rum and cokes!), ingesting two pounds of sugar and 970 milligrams of caffeine. Without pop, Harris suffered withdrawal-like symptoms. She also ate poorly and smoked heavily, all of which contributed to her early demise.

Buggy Blues

Edward Archbold entered a bug eating contest in West Palm Beach, Florida, hoping to win the free python grand prize. Archbold won the competition after consuming a quantity of meal worms, horn worms, and roaches, before he began vomiting and collapsed. The 32-year-old died of “asphyxia due to choking and aspiration of gastric contents”. All the man wanted was a python… wait, why would anyone want a python!?

Water Boarding

In yet another contest gone wrong, Jennifer Strange died of water intoxication after drinking a hefty amount of the liquid, trying to win a Nintendo Wii video game console. The competition, held by a Sacramento, California radio station had volunteers drink the H20 and then try to not pee (Hold Your Wee for a Wii) for the longest amount of time. Strange’s family sued for wrongful death and were rewarded over $16 million in damages. Oddly, Strange was found to have not contributed to her own death, but then who drank all that water trying to win a Wii?

Drink #226: Death by Chocolate

1 oz Irish Crème
0.5 oz Crème de Cacao
0.5 oz Vodka (I used Absolut Raspberri)
1 Scoop of Chocolate Ice Cream (I used Wunderbar)
Blend with Ice
Garnish with Chocolate Syrup, Peanut Butter Cup Chunks, and Graham Cracker Crumbs

I personally would prefer to die in a potato chip-related asphyxiation incident. At least that way, I’d be going out with some style and while enjoying one of my favourite treats. How would you preferably spend your end of days?

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I took the Death by Chocolate recipe and adapted it to suit the ingredients I had and wanted to use. I wanted to call it orgasm by chocolate, an homage to chocolate-obsessed women everywhere, but we went with this moniker instead.

August 13 – The Wave

Posted on August 13, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Chain Gang

Mrs. Sip and I are always looking to try new restaurants. We travel often enough that it’s always good to have some ideas of places to hit in locations we aren’t accustomed to. That said, here are some chains I want to visit for the first time:

Carl’s Jr.

Watching TV the other day, I saw a new commercial for Carl’s Jr. that featured the Epic Meal Time guys presenting the burger joint’s new offering: the Super Bacon Burger. While this sandwich would have previously been unobtainable to me, save for a jaunt down to the United States, a Carl’s Jr. just opened up in my neighbourhood.

She seems to like it!

Chipotle Mexican Grill

Chipotle is another chain that recently crossed the border and opened a location mere blocks from my home and work. Sadly, I have yet to visit, despite hearing good things. The restaurant’s food spiciness has been lampooned on South Park before, thanks to Cartman’s often disgusting eating habits.

Sonic Drive-In

I’ve enjoyed a number of commercials from this outlet and it would be totally nostalgic to visit one of these drive-in locations, complete with roller skating carhops. In recent years, the brand has also opened two Sonic Beach locations, which offer outdoor seating and serve beer and wine!

In-N-Out Burger

The draw of In-N-Out Burger is their “secret menu,” which features options like Animal Style Fries (fries with two slices of melted cheese, sauce, and grilled onions). The chain remains quite popular with customers because of this and other moves, such as paying employees well above the minimum wage in the areas they operate.

Chick-Fil-A

Despite the owner’s checkered history with public relations, I’ve heard great things about the food at Chick-Fil-A and would like to give it a shot. I love chicken burgers and any place that claims “We didn’t invent the chicken, just the chicken sandwich,” deserves a chance to prove their mettle, in my books.

White Castle

If it was good enough for Harold and Kumar, then it’s good enough for me! It would be interesting to see how many of their famous sliders I could force down my gullet. I’m no competitive eater, but if these treats are as good as advertised, I’d love to take a crack at demolishing a stack of them.

Dave & Buster’s

This is like the adult version of Chuck E. Cheese’s combining video games, booze, food, and fun! If I was near any location, I would most certainly have my birthday there and redeem game tickets for penny candy, bouncy balls, and squirt guns! Come on, little sippers, let’s make this dream come true!!!

Drink #225: The Wave (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

1 oz Cherry Lemonade Vodka
1 oz Captain Morgan Bite Rum
0.5 oz Blue Curacao
Top with Club Soda or Lemon-Lime Soda
Blend with Ice
Garnish with Maraschino Cherries and a Cocktail Umbrella

Do you have any suggestions of chains I should try as Mrs. Sip and I travel the world? Obviously, you don’t know where we been and what we’ve tried, but if there’s a restaurant you treasure and you’d like to share that with us, feel free to throw it out there.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
This recipe was created by Mrs. Sip and Cousin Sip and used some very interesting spirit choices, creating a tasty blend. Depending on how sweet you want the cocktail, you can use either Club Soda or Lemon-Lime Soda as a mixer. For added presentation points, the girls added a light-up ice cube to the frozen concoction, giving it an alluring glow!

August 12 – Wildberry Daiquiri

Posted on August 12, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Missing Meals

Over the span of my life, I’ve seen restaurants come and go. Some I couldn’t care less for and others left a little mark on this boozehound’s soul. I’m prone to the odd moment of nostalgia. While some of these chains still exist, their locations that were closest to me have ceased operations, leaving me le sad. Here are the restaurants I miss:

Godfather’s Pizza

The pizza you can’t refuse! The Godfather’s outlet that was near our house growing up was filled with video games and played host to a number of wind-ups for sports teams I belonged to. It was perfect for parents. Stuff your child full of pizza and pop and let them run around and blow a stack of quarters on games. Surely, they slept well that night!

Bonanza Steakhouse

This will start an interesting trifecta of restaurants that just couldn’t catch on in the same location. I don’t remember too much about this joint because I was quite young, but I believe Ma and Pa Sip were fans because I was cognizant of its existence. The chain went through bankruptcy in 2008 (a somewhat common theme in the industry), but emerged and still has locations in the U.S. When Bonanza left my area and went back to the Ponderosa, in its place came…

Sizzler

As a fussy eater when I was young, I used to love salad bars, where I could just grab a few items here and there and not be bugged to struggle with food I didn’t much care for. I guess it’s kind of ironic that I liked salad and veggies as a young’un, while most kids hate the healthy stuff. In the interest of full disclosure, I was in it for the croutons and bread sticks! Sizzler left the area when I was still quite young, to be replaced by…

Lone Star Steakhouse & Saloon

As a little sipper, I attended a number of birthday parties at the one Lone Star location that came to my neck of the woods. It was a novelty to go to a country-western themed eatery, with cow-folk servers and permission to throw your complimentary peanut shells on the floor. The chain didn’t last long enough for me to attend as a Sip Advisor. Interestingly, the Lone Star chain has no restaurants in the Lone Star State of Texas. I guess it just wouldn’t be unique there.

Izzy’s Buffet

This was the meal stop for many shopping trips across the border with family. It provided a nice mix of culinary options that could suit all the tastes and cravings of a large group. I remember their dessert table being specifically fantastic, with a self-serve ice cream sundae bar and other confectionary delights. The Bellingham, Washington Izzy’s location closed many years ago, replaced by a sex shop of all things

Rainforest Café

When the local Metrotown Mall underwent abundant upgrades many moons ago, one of their newest additions was the Rainforest Café, complete with animatronic jungle animals and an expansive aquarium. It didn’t last long, though, eventually being replaced by an Old Navy store. The only Rainforest Café’s I’m able to visit anymore are in Downtown Disneyland in Anaheim, California and at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, Nevada, if I can get Mrs. Sip to tag along.

T.G.I. Friday’s

Mrs. Sip and I enjoyed an early date at T.G.I. Friday’s, but it may have been the one and only time we ever ate there together. Sadly, it was also before we could legally drink, so we never got to enjoy that element of the chain. Perhaps we’ll have to track down a location in the U.S. and give it another shot now that our tastes have evolved beyond chicken strips and fries orders.

Bennigan’s

The only thing I really know about this chain is that Butters on South Park absolutely adored it. I would love to try it myself, but the company went into bankruptcy in 2008 and closed a number of locations, as a result. 31 Bennigan’s restaurants in the U.S. and 44 abroad still remain, so I may get to try the Irish pub-themed joint eventually. I’ll do it for Butters!

Drink #224: Wildberry Daiquiri (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

1.5 oz White Rum (I used Bacardi)
Top with Wildberry Juice
Splash of Lime Juice
Blend with Ice
Garnish with Blueberries

Which restaurants do you wish still existed and why? I’m curious about this because nostalgia can often be a great thing, but sad in many ways, as well, as we think about all the things we once enjoyed that are no longer an option. Now I need to have a little cry!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
The berry taste comes through nicely at the end of each sip, but it’s a pretty tame cocktail overall. Perhaps the flavour can be jacked up a little more with alcohols and liqueurs that go with the mixer.

August 11 – Dirty Colada

Posted on August 11, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Come With Me and Escape

When thinking about this drink, one thing is sure to pop into every person’s mind: the Piña Colada Song. The one hit wonder (actually titled Escape, but long since known as the Piña Colada Song), by Rupert Holmes, features an anonymous personal ad that asks a number of interesting questions that I have decided I should answer. Let’s see if I would make a good match! (If you need a refresher of the song, the video is posted below and lyrics can be found here).

If You Like Piña Coladas

Yeah, they’re okay, but to be honest, I’m not the biggest fan of frozen drinks, in general. This week dedicated to them is really only done on my charitable time (others might call it community service) to give ideas to all my little sippers who want sweet and icy drinks as they enjoy the rest of their summer. After you’ve had a couple giant frozen drinks in Las Vegas, you just don’t feel like dealing with the brain freeze anymore.

And Getting Caught in the Rain

Um, no. While visions of getting caught in a tropical rain storm, clothing plastered to hot bodies, shearing steamy kisses is all very nice for those of us lucky to live somewhere like Hawaii, as a resident of “Raincity”, let me tell you how rain works. It’s cold, it’s wet, and I usually end up getting caught with no umbrella en route to or from work and getting drenched in clothes I have to wear all day. Welcome to reality.

If You’re Not Into Yoga

Okay, we definitely have a match here. I am not into yoga in the slightest. Granted, I’ve only done it once before, but all I wanted to do was crack jokes about the various poses, especially their names. I like to think of myself as a reasonably flexible guy, so I do have to give credit to yoga fanatics as some of those stretches were difficult (particularly in the balance realm), but if I’m going to have a true workout, it’s not going to be through stretching.

If You Have Half a Brain

Sorry, Rupert, you lost me again. The most I can give myself credit for having brain wise is a quarter to a third. If having half a brain is a prerequisite, then you will wind up disappointed. Don’t cry for me though. I’ve done this on purpose, so that when the zombie apocalypse arrives, I won’t be an attractive target and will be able to live out my days in peace and harmony as the owner and proprietor of a bar that caters to the undead.

If You’d Like Making Love at Midnight…In the Dunes of the Cape

I’m ready and raring to go at all hours of the day. Mrs. Sip hates me for that, but it is soooooo good to be hated. Unfortunately I’m right on board until the next line, in the dunes of the cape? Seriously? Remember, I’ve already written about places not to be amorous and my distaste for sand and beaches would certainly preclude this added condition.

So, in the end, I don’t think I’d reply to this personal ad. We really only match up on the anti-yoga thing and if the only way I’m going to get laid is by going to the beach at midnight… I’m sorry, I’m just not that into you. I do wish you all the best in your future endeavours, however.

Drink #223: Dirty Colada (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Rim glass with Pineapple Sugar
2 oz Rum (I used Krakan Black Spiced Rum)
Top with half Coconut Cream and half Pineapple Juice

The ironic thing about this song is that both the singer and ‘his lady’ are basically writing and responding to a personal ad, looking to cheat on and leave the other. Then when they get together and realize they had actually been writing and responding to each other, they laugh it off like nothing happened. No wonder this dude was a one hit wonder!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
In a pinch, you could use Piña Colada mix, instead of the juices or fresh fruit, but I like to bring my best to this site. Most Piña Coladas come out white in colour, but my use of Kraken Black Spiced Rum made this cocktail a little more dirty, hence the name. While I normally don’t like Pina Coladas, this was enjoyable. It must be said that the Pineapple Sugar Rim was a total pain in the ass to produce.