October 8 – Mudslide

Ready-Made

Personally, I’m not a fan of ready-made booze products. But it’s a topic I feel should be discussed and what better time to do it than while we enjoy a fresh serving of one of the more popular bottled options, the Mudslide. Here are some other pre-mixed selections available on the market:

Mudslide – Packaged by the folks at Kahlua (among other companies), this is one concoction that I’ve actually tried and I remember (stop laughing… I do have some brain cells left) enjoying. Of course, this was years before I got into mixology and I don’t think I’d try this type of product nowadays.

Kahlua Mudslide

Caesar – There’s been quite the market the last few years for ready-made Caesars and while it’s nice to have such a complicated recipe simplified in bottle form, I think the Caesar truly shines when you put all those intricate ingredients together yourself.

Cola Mixes – This can be done with rum, whiskey, bourbon, etc. with companies such as Bacardi, Malibu, Bulleit, Jim Beam, and Jack Daniel’s flooding the market. Broski Sip and I did find ourselves enjoying Jack Daniel’s Hard Cola on one vacation, but that was many moons before I became the Sip Advisor you worship today… I’m a bit of a booze snob now. Most of these liquor companies also offer their spirit mixed with ginger ale for the anti-cola drinker.

Gin & Tonic – G&T’s are so easy to make, it amazes me that anyone would need it to be pre-mixed and bottled for them, but the world has become incredibly lazy. Gordon’s is one prominent company that has jumped aboard the ‘ready-to-drink’ train. Smirnoff also offers a vodka tonic mix.Gordon's G&T

Cosmopolitan – I guess you could still pour your Cosmo bottle into a martini glass, but I think all of the class and sophistication the drink is supposed to come with would be lost. The girls on Sex and the City would be so horrified!

Mojito – I strive to make a wicked Mojito and have received rave reviews. I just can’t fathom enjoying a pre-mixed version of the cocktail, so I’ll just move on.

Long Island Iced Tea – I am a fan of the pre-mixed Long Island Iced Tea spirit, combining vodka, gin, rum, and triple sec in one fell swoop, but I don’t think I’d like a pre-bottled version of the drink, eliminating the chance for me to play with different mixers.

Long Island Iced Tea Box

Long Island Iced Tea in a box!?!? Oh, shizzle, where do I sign up!

Dark N’ Stormy – Made by the Bundaberg Rum company, I only wonder if they got clearance from the Gosling’s folks to bottle this drink, since Gosling’s claims a copyright on the Dark N’ Stormy recipe and will fight bartenders who use it sans Gosling’s Rum.

Daiquiri/Margarita – I’ve seen these offerings in a wide array of flavours, from lime to strawberry to mango and everything in between. I’m a huge fan of the legitimate versions of these drinks and am curious to try the pre-mixed style, but also a little cautious, as well.

Pina Colada – We finish with the Pina Colada, which troubles me a little because I think the drink is best received in frozen form. I guess you could add it to shaved ice, much like a snow cone, but given we are mired in the onset of winter, I can’t even think about summer drinks at the moment.

Drink #281: Mudslide

Mudslide Drink Recipe

  • 1 oz Tequila (I used Hornitos)
  • 0.5 oz Kahlua
  • 0.5 oz Chocolate Liqueur
  • 0.5 oz Irish Crème
  • Top with Chocolate Milk
  • Garnish with Peanut Butter Cup

It seems that all of your popular cocktails have been released in pre-mix form. That’s capitalism for you, I suppose. If this is how you prefer to get your swerve on, I don’t hate you… I just don’t like you very much!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
There are a variety of Mudslide recipes in existence. The ingredients I used are an amalgamation of those offerings. The Tequila stood out a little stronger than I would have liked, but otherwise, the cocktail was passable.

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September 15 – Cuba Libre

Rum Runners

Today marks the start of Rum Week here at The Sip and by now, you surely know what that means… a small dose of rum education! So, put your thinking caps on (come on, I ask this of you so seldom), sharpen those pencils, and prepare to have your brains stuffed with useless knowledge. Only the best for my little sippers!

Caribbean: Putting The Punch In Rum

Drink #258: Cuba Libre

Cuba Libre Drink Recipe

  • 1.5 oz Gold Rum (I used Bacardi)
  • Top with Cola
  • Garnish with Lime Wedges

I love these infographics. They make my job so much easier. And don’t you think I deserve the odd day off, allowing me to kick back with a few Cuba Libres? You’re right, I’ve earned every bit of vacation time I have!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I used the original Cuba Libre recipe for today’s offering and, of course, it was delicious. I like to try all kinds of different Rums, looking for the right combo with Cola. I prefer Spiced Rums, but Gold Rum gets the job done in a pinch. Anytime you have a plain Rum and Coke, there must be an element of Lime added to the mix. Whether that be some fresh-squeezed Lime Juice, or at the very least, Lime Wedges as part of the recipe… that will combat the scurvy!

August 11 – Dirty Colada

Come With Me and Escape

When thinking about this drink, one thing is sure to pop into every person’s mind: the Piña Colada Song. The one hit wonder (actually titled Escape, but long since known as the Piña Colada Song), by Rupert Holmes, features an anonymous personal ad that asks a number of interesting questions that I have decided I should answer. Let’s see if  I would make a good match! (If you need a refresher of the song, the video is posted below and lyrics can be found here).

If You Like Piña Coladas

Yeah, they’re okay, but to be honest, I’m not the biggest fan of frozen drinks, in general. This week dedicated to them is really only done on my charitable time (others might call it community service) to give ideas to all my little sippers who want sweet and icy drinks as they enjoy the rest of their summer. After you’ve had a couple giant frozen drinks in Las Vegas, you just don’t feel like dealing with the brain freeze anymore.

And Getting Caught in the Rain

Um, no. While visions of getting caught in a tropical rain storm, clothing plastered to hot bodies, shearing steamy kisses is all very nice for those of us lucky to live somewhere like Hawaii, as a resident of “Raincity”, let me tell you how rain works. It’s cold,  it’s wet, and I usually end up getting caught with no umbrella en route to or from work and getting drenched in clothes I have to wear all day. Welcome to reality.

If You’re Not Into Yoga

Okay, we definitely have a match here. I am not into yoga in the slightest. Granted, I’ve only done it once before, but all I wanted to do was crack jokes about the various poses, especially their names. I like to think of myself as a reasonably flexible guy, so I do have to give credit to yoga fanatics as some of those stretches were difficult (particularly in the balance realm), but if I’m going to have a true workout, it’s not going to be through stretching.

Posted @ Funny-Picks.com

If You Have Half a Brain

Sorry, Rupert, you lost me again. The most I can give myself credit for having brain wise is a quarter to a third. If having half a brain is a prerequisite, then you will wind up disappointed. Don’t cry for me though. I’ve done this on purpose, so that when the zombie apocalypse arrives, I won’t be an attractive target and will be able to live out my days in peace and harmony as the owner and proprietor of a bar that caters to the undead.

If You’d Like Making Love at Midnight…In the Dunes of the Cape

I’m ready and raring to go at all hours of the day. Mrs. Sip hates me for that, but it is soooooo good to be hated. Unfortunately I’m right on board until the next line, in the dunes of the cape? Seriously? Remember, I’ve already written about places not to be amorous and my distaste for sand and beaches would certainly preclude this added condition.

So, in the end, I don’t think I’d reply to this personal ad. We really only match up on the anti-yoga thing and if the only way I’m going to get laid is by going to the beach at midnight… I’m sorry, I’m just not that into you. I do wish you all the best in your future endeavours, however.

Drink #223: Dirty Colada (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Dirty Pina Colada Cocktail

  • Rim glass with Pineapple Sugar
  • 2 oz Rum (I used Krakan Black Spiced Rum)
  • Top with half Coconut Cream and half Pineapple Juice

The ironic thing about this song is that both the singer and ‘his lady’ are basically writing and responding to a personal ad, looking to cheat on and leave the other. Then when they get together and realize they had actually been writing and responding to each other, they laugh it off like nothing happened. No wonder this dude was a one hit wonder!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
In a pinch, you could use Piña Colada mix, instead of the juices or fresh fruit, but I like to bring my best to this site. Most Piña Coladas come out white in colour, but my use of Kraken Black Spiced Rum made this cocktail a little more dirty, hence the name. While I normally don’t like Pina Coladas, this was enjoyable. It must be said that the Pineapple Sugar Rim was a total pain in the ass to produce.