August 13 – The Wave

Posted on August 13, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Chain Gang

Mrs. Sip and I are always looking to try new restaurants. We travel often enough that it’s always good to have some ideas of places to hit in locations we aren’t accustomed to. That said, here are some chains I want to visit for the first time:

Carl’s Jr.

Watching TV the other day, I saw a new commercial for Carl’s Jr. that featured the Epic Meal Time guys presenting the burger joint’s new offering: the Super Bacon Burger. While this sandwich would have previously been unobtainable to me, save for a jaunt down to the United States, a Carl’s Jr. just opened up in my neighbourhood.

She seems to like it!

Chipotle Mexican Grill

Chipotle is another chain that recently crossed the border and opened a location mere blocks from my home and work. Sadly, I have yet to visit, despite hearing good things. The restaurant’s food spiciness has been lampooned on South Park before, thanks to Cartman’s often disgusting eating habits.

Sonic Drive-In

I’ve enjoyed a number of commercials from this outlet and it would be totally nostalgic to visit one of these drive-in locations, complete with roller skating carhops. In recent years, the brand has also opened two Sonic Beach locations, which offer outdoor seating and serve beer and wine!

In-N-Out Burger

The draw of In-N-Out Burger is their “secret menu,” which features options like Animal Style Fries (fries with two slices of melted cheese, sauce, and grilled onions). The chain remains quite popular with customers because of this and other moves, such as paying employees well above the minimum wage in the areas they operate.

Chick-Fil-A

Despite the owner’s checkered history with public relations, I’ve heard great things about the food at Chick-Fil-A and would like to give it a shot. I love chicken burgers and any place that claims “We didn’t invent the chicken, just the chicken sandwich,” deserves a chance to prove their mettle, in my books.

White Castle

If it was good enough for Harold and Kumar, then it’s good enough for me! It would be interesting to see how many of their famous sliders I could force down my gullet. I’m no competitive eater, but if these treats are as good as advertised, I’d love to take a crack at demolishing a stack of them.

Dave & Buster’s

This is like the adult version of Chuck E. Cheese’s combining video games, booze, food, and fun! If I was near any location, I would most certainly have my birthday there and redeem game tickets for penny candy, bouncy balls, and squirt guns! Come on, little sippers, let’s make this dream come true!!!

Drink #225: The Wave (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

1 oz Cherry Lemonade Vodka
1 oz Captain Morgan Bite Rum
0.5 oz Blue Curacao
Top with Club Soda or Lemon-Lime Soda
Blend with Ice
Garnish with Maraschino Cherries and a Cocktail Umbrella

Do you have any suggestions of chains I should try as Mrs. Sip and I travel the world? Obviously, you don’t know where we been and what we’ve tried, but if there’s a restaurant you treasure and you’d like to share that with us, feel free to throw it out there.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
This recipe was created by Mrs. Sip and Cousin Sip and used some very interesting spirit choices, creating a tasty blend. Depending on how sweet you want the cocktail, you can use either Club Soda or Lemon-Lime Soda as a mixer. For added presentation points, the girls added a light-up ice cube to the frozen concoction, giving it an alluring glow!

August 12 – Wildberry Daiquiri

Posted on August 12, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Missing Meals

Over the span of my life, I’ve seen restaurants come and go. Some I couldn’t care less for and others left a little mark on this boozehound’s soul. I’m prone to the odd moment of nostalgia. While some of these chains still exist, their locations that were closest to me have ceased operations, leaving me le sad. Here are the restaurants I miss:

Godfather’s Pizza

The pizza you can’t refuse! The Godfather’s outlet that was near our house growing up was filled with video games and played host to a number of wind-ups for sports teams I belonged to. It was perfect for parents. Stuff your child full of pizza and pop and let them run around and blow a stack of quarters on games. Surely, they slept well that night!

Bonanza Steakhouse

This will start an interesting trifecta of restaurants that just couldn’t catch on in the same location. I don’t remember too much about this joint because I was quite young, but I believe Ma and Pa Sip were fans because I was cognizant of its existence. The chain went through bankruptcy in 2008 (a somewhat common theme in the industry), but emerged and still has locations in the U.S. When Bonanza left my area and went back to the Ponderosa, in its place came…

Sizzler

As a fussy eater when I was young, I used to love salad bars, where I could just grab a few items here and there and not be bugged to struggle with food I didn’t much care for. I guess it’s kind of ironic that I liked salad and veggies as a young’un, while most kids hate the healthy stuff. In the interest of full disclosure, I was in it for the croutons and bread sticks! Sizzler left the area when I was still quite young, to be replaced by…

Lone Star Steakhouse & Saloon

As a little sipper, I attended a number of birthday parties at the one Lone Star location that came to my neck of the woods. It was a novelty to go to a country-western themed eatery, with cow-folk servers and permission to throw your complimentary peanut shells on the floor. The chain didn’t last long enough for me to attend as a Sip Advisor. Interestingly, the Lone Star chain has no restaurants in the Lone Star State of Texas. I guess it just wouldn’t be unique there.

Izzy’s Buffet

This was the meal stop for many shopping trips across the border with family. It provided a nice mix of culinary options that could suit all the tastes and cravings of a large group. I remember their dessert table being specifically fantastic, with a self-serve ice cream sundae bar and other confectionary delights. The Bellingham, Washington Izzy’s location closed many years ago, replaced by a sex shop of all things

Rainforest Café

When the local Metrotown Mall underwent abundant upgrades many moons ago, one of their newest additions was the Rainforest Café, complete with animatronic jungle animals and an expansive aquarium. It didn’t last long, though, eventually being replaced by an Old Navy store. The only Rainforest Café’s I’m able to visit anymore are in Downtown Disneyland in Anaheim, California and at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, Nevada, if I can get Mrs. Sip to tag along.

T.G.I. Friday’s

Mrs. Sip and I enjoyed an early date at T.G.I. Friday’s, but it may have been the one and only time we ever ate there together. Sadly, it was also before we could legally drink, so we never got to enjoy that element of the chain. Perhaps we’ll have to track down a location in the U.S. and give it another shot now that our tastes have evolved beyond chicken strips and fries orders.

Bennigan’s

The only thing I really know about this chain is that Butters on South Park absolutely adored it. I would love to try it myself, but the company went into bankruptcy in 2008 and closed a number of locations, as a result. 31 Bennigan’s restaurants in the U.S. and 44 abroad still remain, so I may get to try the Irish pub-themed joint eventually. I’ll do it for Butters!

Drink #224: Wildberry Daiquiri (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

1.5 oz White Rum (I used Bacardi)
Top with Wildberry Juice
Splash of Lime Juice
Blend with Ice
Garnish with Blueberries

Which restaurants do you wish still existed and why? I’m curious about this because nostalgia can often be a great thing, but sad in many ways, as well, as we think about all the things we once enjoyed that are no longer an option. Now I need to have a little cry!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
The berry taste comes through nicely at the end of each sip, but it’s a pretty tame cocktail overall. Perhaps the flavour can be jacked up a little more with alcohols and liqueurs that go with the mixer.

August 11 – Dirty Colada

Posted on August 11, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Come With Me and Escape

When thinking about this drink, one thing is sure to pop into every person’s mind: the Piña Colada Song. The one hit wonder (actually titled Escape, but long since known as the Piña Colada Song), by Rupert Holmes, features an anonymous personal ad that asks a number of interesting questions that I have decided I should answer. Let’s see if I would make a good match! (If you need a refresher of the song, the video is posted below and lyrics can be found here).

If You Like Piña Coladas

Yeah, they’re okay, but to be honest, I’m not the biggest fan of frozen drinks, in general. This week dedicated to them is really only done on my charitable time (others might call it community service) to give ideas to all my little sippers who want sweet and icy drinks as they enjoy the rest of their summer. After you’ve had a couple giant frozen drinks in Las Vegas, you just don’t feel like dealing with the brain freeze anymore.

And Getting Caught in the Rain

Um, no. While visions of getting caught in a tropical rain storm, clothing plastered to hot bodies, shearing steamy kisses is all very nice for those of us lucky to live somewhere like Hawaii, as a resident of “Raincity”, let me tell you how rain works. It’s cold, it’s wet, and I usually end up getting caught with no umbrella en route to or from work and getting drenched in clothes I have to wear all day. Welcome to reality.

If You’re Not Into Yoga

Okay, we definitely have a match here. I am not into yoga in the slightest. Granted, I’ve only done it once before, but all I wanted to do was crack jokes about the various poses, especially their names. I like to think of myself as a reasonably flexible guy, so I do have to give credit to yoga fanatics as some of those stretches were difficult (particularly in the balance realm), but if I’m going to have a true workout, it’s not going to be through stretching.

If You Have Half a Brain

Sorry, Rupert, you lost me again. The most I can give myself credit for having brain wise is a quarter to a third. If having half a brain is a prerequisite, then you will wind up disappointed. Don’t cry for me though. I’ve done this on purpose, so that when the zombie apocalypse arrives, I won’t be an attractive target and will be able to live out my days in peace and harmony as the owner and proprietor of a bar that caters to the undead.

If You’d Like Making Love at Midnight…In the Dunes of the Cape

I’m ready and raring to go at all hours of the day. Mrs. Sip hates me for that, but it is soooooo good to be hated. Unfortunately I’m right on board until the next line, in the dunes of the cape? Seriously? Remember, I’ve already written about places not to be amorous and my distaste for sand and beaches would certainly preclude this added condition.

So, in the end, I don’t think I’d reply to this personal ad. We really only match up on the anti-yoga thing and if the only way I’m going to get laid is by going to the beach at midnight… I’m sorry, I’m just not that into you. I do wish you all the best in your future endeavours, however.

Drink #223: Dirty Colada (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Rim glass with Pineapple Sugar
2 oz Rum (I used Krakan Black Spiced Rum)
Top with half Coconut Cream and half Pineapple Juice

The ironic thing about this song is that both the singer and ‘his lady’ are basically writing and responding to a personal ad, looking to cheat on and leave the other. Then when they get together and realize they had actually been writing and responding to each other, they laugh it off like nothing happened. No wonder this dude was a one hit wonder!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
In a pinch, you could use Piña Colada mix, instead of the juices or fresh fruit, but I like to bring my best to this site. Most Piña Coladas come out white in colour, but my use of Kraken Black Spiced Rum made this cocktail a little more dirty, hence the name. While I normally don’t like Pina Coladas, this was enjoyable. It must be said that the Pineapple Sugar Rim was a total pain in the ass to produce.

July 30 – Maple Donut

Posted on July 30, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Mmmm, Donuts!

One of The Sip Advisor’s favourite snack treats is the donut, despite the rarity in which I actually indulge in having one (after all, I can’t look as good as I do without a little effort in self-discipline!). Let’s take a little look at some of the more interesting bits and bites I was able to dig up on such a treasured subject!

The donut is the favourite food of Homer Simpson and he isn’t alone. It’s estimated that 10 billion donuts are made annually in the U.S. and the average American will eat 63 of these snacks each year.

National Donut Day occurs on the first Friday of every June and celebrates volunteers with the Salvation Army providing World War I veterans with the treat nearly a century ago. Sadly, Canada doesn’t recognize this holiday, but donut chains like Krispy Kreme, which have expanded into the country, extend the same free donut offer they do in the U.S. to their Canadian customers.

The glazed donut is by far the world’s most popular selection and only contains 200 calories on average. Other more “health conscious” breakfast items such as bagels or croissants will rack you up much more than that in calory content.

According to WhitePages.com, 10 people in the United States have the name Donut or Doughnut. I’m not sure if this is a hippy thing or just a snack treat loving thing.

At the 1933 World’s Fair in Chicago, the donut was lauded as the “Hit Food of the Century of Progress”… that’s some serious street cred!

The art of dunking a donut into coffee was popularized by Clark Gable in the movie It Happened One Night. Legend persists though, that actress Mae Murray was the first to ever try this combination when she accidentally dropped her snack into a cup of java.

Voodoo Doughnut in Oregon has become world famous for their unique recipes and eclectic business operations. It even performs marriage ceremonies, providing donuts and coffee for the reception. Some of Voodoo’s fascinating recipes include the Captain My Captain, featuring Captain Crunch cereal on top of vanilla frosting and the Bacon-Maple Bar, with strips of crispy bacon. It also experiments with other cereals, such as Froot Loops and Cocoa Puffs, and many of Voodoo’s doughnuts have a sexual or occult overtone. The company used to offer NyQuil Glazed and Vanilla Pepto Crushed Tums doughnuts, but local health officials kyboshed those varieties.

Tim Horton’s, Canada’s largest contribution to the coffee and donut game, was founded by a former NHL player of the same name. Sadly, while he enjoyed some success with the business, he never saw the company grow into what it has become, dying after a high-speed police chase. His blood alcohol level was twice the legal limit at the time of his death. It may be a little ironic that Tim Horton’s has an annual Roll-Up the Rim to Win prize campaign, when its founder died rolling his sports car. On a positive note, despite Horton’s widow selling the family’s shares in the company for $1 million to Horton’s business partner and co-founder, Ron Joyce, Joyce’s son and Horton’s daughter later got married, bringing the Horton family back into the ownership fold.

Speaking of donut shops, I’m proud to say that Canada has more outlets per capita than any other country in the world. That’s some impressive stuff from my countrymen! Sadly, we can’t claim to have created the largest donut ever, as that unsurprisingly goes to the U.S. with a jelly donut weighting 1.7 tons.

There is much debate over doughnut vs. donut. I prefer donut and will only use the other form if that is the actual name of a company… enough of this arguing though, it’s time for some pastry snacking of the solid and liquid variety!

Drink #211: Maple Donut (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Rim glass with Sugar
1.5 oz Glazed Donut Liqueur
1.5 oz Crown Royal Maple Whiskey

Do you have any donut trivia to pass along to me? I’ll just be sitting here downing a Long John or two and sipping away at this terrific martini. But don’t worry about disturbing me… it was bound to happen sooner or later!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
On a whim, I put together this little recipe and it was a hit with the entire Sip Alliance. My only regret is that I didn’t have a donut or Timbit (Canadian donut hole) around to garnish the cocktail with. Oh well, will have to remember this slip up in the future.

July 28 – The Ultimate Warrior

Posted on July 28, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Battle Royal

The TV show Deadliest Warrior takes a look at hypothetical battles between ancient armies, modern day forces, and ruthless leaders. The fine folks running the program have lent me their software, in exchange for my Nintendo Wii, and I’ve decided to run some data. Here are a few Deadliest Warrior simulations I’ve run through their super computer:

Muppets vs. American Gladiators

On paper, this looks to be a no-brainer, but in reality, while the American Gladiators are hulking, intimidating foes, you really can’t hurt a Muppet. Muppets are practically invincible and you have to figure that the Gladiators will tire eventually, especially with the Muppets constantly cracking jokes – some good, some awful.
Winner: Muppets – No matter how many times the American Gladiators shot at the Muppets with their patented tennis ball cannon or smacked the likes of Kermit, Gonzo and Fozzy with jousting sticks, the persistent Muppets continued to attack. In particular, Animal was a brave and wild soldier, attacking the Gladiators with total disregard for his own well-being.

Skeletons vs. Monkeys

The real issue here is whether or not skeletons are prone to pain. Can you kill what is already dead? I say, hypothetically yes. Monkey weaponry is a mixed bag of tactics. There is, of course, the dung bomb, as well as the much-feared fury attack. Skeletons, however, are just creepy and can move around in an unfathomable manner.
Winner: The monkeys’ ability to attack and retreat gives them the edge in this close battle.

Cats vs. Jelly Beans

Cats may be lazy and easily distracted, but they also have a killer instinct when searching for “gifts” for their owners. Jelly beans are perhaps even lazier than kitties, just lying there, waiting to be eaten. Much like a possum, however, a jelly bean’s greatest asset is lying in wait and delivering sometimes grotesque flavours upon its attacker. Unless the jelly bean is tuna-flavoured, it may have an advantage on cats.
Winner: Jelly Beans – In a battle of who cares less, shockingly kittens do, and the last standing–as the cats pursue other interests like strings and bouncing balls–is the inanimate candy.

Hockey Players vs. Decepticons

On one hand, hockey players are some of the toughest dudes on the planet, known for playing through serious injury and never hesitating to sacrifice their body, en route to championship glory. On the other hand, the Decepticons are freakin’ robots… and evil robots, at that. Although given how some hockey players answer media questions, that depiction might not be solely for the Transformers.
Winner: I have to side with the hockey players. If Shia Labeouf can take on the Decepticons, is easy to fathom some of hockey’s greatest goons standing a chance, too.

Fast Food Servers vs. Jedis

I mean sure, one side has mind-power abilities and weapons that can slice through human flesh, but the other side are freakin’ Jedis! See what I did there… totally suckered you all in. The Jedis have a distinct advantage going into this battle, but never underestimate a slacker who holds you meal’s fate in his hands. Fast food servers can over season it, under cook it, or worst of all, spit on it!
Winner: I gotta give the W to the Jedis thanks to leadership from puppets like Yoda and Samuel L. Jackson.

Moonshiners vs. Birdwatchers

While moonshiners have the weaponry and will defend their stash to the death, birdwatchers are patient and can wait for unbelievable amounts of time prior to stealthy strikes. You also have to figure that the moonshiners will be plastered and that could alter their abilities on the battlefield.
Winner: The moonshiners get the duke for two reasons: shotguns trump binoculars and who the hell can ever have any respect for people who care about birds!

Drink #209: The Ultimate Warrior (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Rim glass with Sprinkles
0.5 oz Jagermeister
0.5 oz Wiser’s Spiced Whiskey
0.5 oz Crowberry Frost Liqueur
Top with Root Beer

Are there any other battles you want me to run through the simulator, before I return the Deadliest Warrior computer to its rightful owner? If you can manage to make me laugh, I’ll have cocktail in your honour!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I picked liquors that I felt fell under the “warrior” motif. Jagermeister and Wiser’s both run ads about earning the right to drink their spirits and Crowberry Frost Liqueur makes me think of Game of Thrones (Winter is coming, you know). Root Beer was my pick for mixer because, let’s be honest, it is above and beyond the most manly soft drink in existence. The Sprinkles came to mind when thinking about former wrestling star The Ultimate Warrior’s face paint. Put it all together and you have one hell of a cocktail!

July 12 – Chocolate Milk Mojito

Posted on July 12, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Back In My Day…

As it is with every generational gap, there are a number of things my children will never get to experience and when I sit them down and tell them about my numerous adventures and quests, they will be forced to ask (as they are gripped by the power of my tales), “Daddy, what’s that?” I will shed a brief tear as I detail a treasure we’ve all lost and an experience point they will never gain (or even need). Love it or hate it, this is the way of our world.

Going to the Video Store

I wasn’t a big video store patron growing up, but we always joke that Mrs. Sip’s dad largely funded his local store with his renting activities, in all likelihood, keeping them in business a couple months more than they had any right to be. I do have to say that there was always a thrill when you’d be taken out to rent a flick. What would you grab for your evening entertainment? What would be available? Would your favourite flick be waiting on the shelf or would it be heartbreakingly gone? And just think of the snacks that flowed as you snuggle up and enjoy your movie. It’s a party…until you have to rush the Video/DVD back by noon the next day or risk the late fines!

Tapes, CDs, DVDs

Every generation loses an item that was previously used to record music or pictures. Growing up, I saw the phasing out of records, tapes, and video cassettes. My kids will likely come into a world where there are absolutely no products to be purchased in order to enjoy entertainment. Everything is becoming downloadable and streamable. Services like iTunes and Netflix are rendering stores like Best Buy, HMV, and Future Shop useless and the evolution continues.

Chalkboards and Overhead Projectors

This one may all be for the better. White boards are infinitely superior to gross, dusty chalkboards, while PowerPoint presentations surely top annoying, impractical overhead projectors. I dreaded being picked in school to either write on the chalkboard or projector, knowing my writing style would result in smudged chalk or pen. Things are just so much more sterilized these days and I bet even if chalkboards were still the norm, half the kids in the school wouldn’t be able to use them due to the discovery of chalk allergy. Might as well wrap them up in bubbles…

Trans-Fats

With this overwhelming move to healthier lifestyles in recent years (which I am in favour of), we’re losing a lot of wonderful junk food items. We must remember that snacks are okay in moderation. It’s a person’s own choice how much restraint they actually enact. Just because some fatty wants to stuff a few more Oreos in their gullet shouldn’t affect my ability to have a Tollhouse Ice Cream Cookie Sandwich with all its glorious trans-fats still in place. Sadly, my children won’t get to experience such an occasional treat as this.

Walking to School

It seems kids get driven everywhere nowadays. Or if, in the rare case, they actually walk to school, they are accompanied by a parent from door-to-door. Gone are the days when your group of children would gather in a cul-de-sac and traverse the mean streets together. I believe that eventually legs will become redundant and humans will turn into a race of non-walkers. It’s already happening at the world’s biggest theme parks and will be coming to a town near you soon!

Pennies and Paper Money

Penny for your thoughts? Ha, not anymore. Pennies are being eradicated from the earth and finding lose change on the street (a childhood thrill) will soon be a figment of the past with more and more folks from my generation refusing to carry anything but plastic. My kids will also never have to worry about washing their clothes with money in their pocket, thanks to Canada’s new polymer bills. While this is good in that I won’t have to worry about their allowance being destroyed, it won’t teach them to keep track of their belongings and value their gifts.

Drink #193: Chocolate Milk Mojito (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Muddled Mint Leaves and Limes
1.5 oz White Rum (I used Bacardi)
0.5 oz Peppermint Schnapps
Top with Chocolate Milk
Garnish with Chocolate Straw and Lime Wedge

I think for one week every year, we should force our children to live the way we did, giving them a chance to reflect on how good they have it – and also how awesome our lives have been. We could call it: A Blast from the Past, and while our kids beg us to return to normalcy, we shall refuse, for we are having too much fun!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2 Sips out of 5):
This had potential, but I might have misfired in some areas. I would remove the Lime and Peppermint Schnapps from future servings, as the Mint Liqueur is unnecessary and the Lime doesn’t play nice with the Chocolate Milk. Failure is not having the courage to try!

July 6 – Bert and Ernie

Posted on July 6, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

All Grown Up

No matter my age, I will always love cartoons. Of course, there is a large selection of animated comedies for an adult audience (The Simpsons, South Park, Family Guy, Archer, among them), but there is also a special cross section of shows meant for children that have subtle adult themes and so can be enjoyed by young and old alike. Here are some of the best:

Fillmore

This is a very clever show that spoofs the 1980’s crime shows and movies like Miami Vice and the Lethal Weapon franchise. Instead of episodes involving drug trafficking, the case may be about tartar sauce smuggling, while stolen cars are replaced by scooter theft. Unfortunately, Fillmore’s crime solving only lasted a couple seasons and now the creator does work for The Walking Dead. Yeah, kids show to zombie apocalypse drama… that seems like a totally obvious creative jump!

Recess

I watched a lot of Recess during my college years, as it had a nice timeslot around the time I was back home from classes and prepping for the odd nap. The series provided a great reminder of years gone by and the fun enjoyed during elementary school, running around with your buddies and getting up to trouble during recess and lunch breaks. I still get up to trouble on my work lunches, but without any recess, the number of sticky situations I’m involved in has drastically dropped.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

I vowed to never watch any TMNT revival show. I mean, how could it ever compare to the legendary original while I was growing up? As Mrs. Sip and I lazily got ready for a day in Las Vegas (aka as Mrs. Sip refused to get out of bed until her hangover subsided), we stumbled upon a Saturday morning cartoon block and ended up half watching an episode of the newest relaunch series. It actually had a few laughs and earned a second episode opportunity (that or we were being really, um…slothful), which was also enjoyable.

SpongeBob SquarePants

I’ve only seen a few episodes of this surreal series, but I can see why both kids and adults could appreciate SpongeBob SquarePants together, at significantly different levels. I don’t even think you have to be stoned (if you’re an adult, of course) to enjoy many of the themes and jokes each episode contains.

Looney Tunes

I have always been a fan of Looney Tunes, since I was a little sipper all the way up to being a Sip Advisor. With all the delicious and gratuitous cartoon violence, it’s hard to fathom that these shows have a target audience of young children. The same can be said for Tiny Toon Adventures, Animaniacs, and any other series that involves the Looney Tunes franchise characters.

The Muppet Show

Puppets are pretty great and The Muppet Show has provided some of my favourite fabricated-Americans. While Kermit the Frog and the gang lure in the younger audience with slapstick comedy and heartfelt songs, there is also some real zingers flying about, especially when the likes of Statler and Waldorf get their screen time.

Sesame Street

Similar to The Muppet Show, I think the adult appeal with Sesame Street, is all about the characters. Characters we’ve all grown up watching and enjoying. I mean, you have the Cookie Monster and Oscar the Grouch getting laughs with their love of cookies and trash, respectively, and you also have a Big Bird and a Snuffleupagus, whatever the hell that is. Plus Bert and Ernie’s questionable relationship is groundbreaking. Speaking of the duo…

Drink #187: Bert and Ernie (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

0.5 oz Jagermeister
0.5 oz Creme de Banane
0.5 oz Orange Soda
Pair with a Rubber Ducky

There have been many search attempts for a Bert and Ernie shot, which have led people to this site. Since that drink doesn’t seem to exist in the liquor world, I decided to create one, so these wonderful people won’t go home unhappy any longer!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
For months I searched for a rubber ducky for this shot and on the day I finally found and bought one, I found one at Ma and Pa Sip’s place. The Creme de Banane is the first thing you smell and taste and probably the most predominant flavour, until the Jager almost seemingly hidden under the surface, hits you and gives the shot that little something extra.

April 14 – Captain Aaron

Posted on April 14, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Oh Captain, My Captain

There is only one man I trust to steer any ship I’m aboard… that’s my man, Captain Aaron! These are some other options I’d consider, even if most of them are nowhere near remotely real:

Captain Morgan

How could any Sip Advisor list in which an alcohol icon was a possible candidate, not lead off with said subject? Naturally, it can’t be any other way. While I’m more of a Sailor Jerry’s fan in the spiced rum category, Captain Morgan isn’t too shabby an alternative and I love the company’s ad campaigns.

Jesus Christ, the Cap`n gets a lot of sweet tail!

Sweet Jesus, the Cap`n sure gets a lot of sweet tail!

Captain Jack Sparrow

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirates life for me! Captain Jack Sparrow is a pretty resourceful guy. He can pretty much get himself out of any sticky situation, is pretty good at hunting long, lost treasure and is not too shabby with the ladies. More importantly, he’s a fan of the bottle and knows where to find hidden stashes of rum on deserted islands.

Captain Crunch

While Cap’n Crunch was far from my favourite cereal growing up, it was on the list of acceptable breakfast options I provided to Mama Sip as a youngster. Like any high profile athlete, my agent and I devised a list of demands that had to be met and cereal selection was chief among them.

Captain Kirk

Captain’s log, stardate 1077.69: I’ve never really been a science fiction nut, but I do have to give some respect to all the Trekkies out there, who show us what being passionate about something really should entail. Captain Kirk never has to buy a drink for himself as long as a geek is close by.

Captain America

While I’m more of a Tony Stark/Iron Man fan, Captain America is a strong leader, who I would be happy to follow into battle. Can you imagine a Canadian version of Captain America, who is light on crime and tries to help bad guys reform rather than punish them? Silly Captain Canada…

Captain Hook

I personally wouldn’t mind seeing Captain Hook get his hands on… oops! sorry, sensitive subject, I know, let me rephrase… get his hand and hook on Peter Pan. Maybe Hook can throw the little brat to the crocodile that’s always hounding him and use the time while the lizard is chowing down on some Pan to get some distance between himself and his pursuer.

Captain McCallister

You might be wondering who this captain even is. Well, I have one word for you: Yarrrrr! Okay, I know all pirates are known to say this, so I’ll just give you the answer. It’s the resident Sea Captain from The Simpsons. Often seen with a corncob pipe and tapping his glass eye, Captain McCallister is not only delightfully incompetent, but gets bonus points for being created by comedian, writer, and late show host Conan O’Brien.

Captain Stubing

While Mrs. Sip and I were on our honeymoon cruise, we were able to watch a few episodes of The Love Boat and quickly fell in love with how laugh-track cheesy the show is. Captain Stubing played a large role in our fondness for the sitcom as he tried to control his band of misfit employees.

Drink #104: Captain Aaron (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

1.5 oz Kraken Black Spiced Rum
Top with Ginger Ale
Splash of Lemonade
Garnish with a Captain’s Hat (If you happen to have one just lying around!)

In the interest of full disclosure, while this is an original recipe, it has been borrowed from the man, the myth, the legend, Captain Aaron himself. Happy birthday, buddy!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
The Cap’n and I love using Ginger Ale as a mixer and I really enjoyed his touch of adding Lemonade to the blend. The Spiced Rum works well with both ingredients, so the whole group comes together quite nicely.

April 10 – Milestone

Posted on April 10, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

A Toast to Us!

This is a big one; we’ve hit the 100^th drink in Sip Advisor history. To celebrate this momentous occasion, I hereby introduce to you the first ever Sip Advisor awards!

Everyone is decked out in his and her best attire, the bubbly is flowing (literally!) and the paparazzo is snapping a ton of pictures… I think they just caught one of my infamous crotch shots. I smell another tabloid settlement! Let’s get on with the award ceremony:

Best Site Searches

It’s so funny seeing the various avenues people take to find this epic site. Some of the most bizarre crossovers seem to bring visitors here and I’m not sure whether I should be flattered or fearful. Nope, I know the answer to that… definitely fearful!

Nominees: babs bunny buster bunny bugs bunny toon sex; how do i get a blow job at new york new york las vegas; sexy frauline lederhosen photo; can get blood clots from getting a purple nurple; babysitteres gone bad; all dogs go to heaven porn

Winner: how do I get a blow job at new york new york las vegas – I knew the Vegas Blowjob shot would get us in trouble! I only hope this lad found his answer… I’m personally still searching!

Best Garnish

In my opinion, garnishing a drink is what completes any recipe. It is only a good drink until you give it some companionship in the form of a wedge, chunk, slice, rim or other non-denominational comrade. As you will see by the nominees below, this award is rim dominated (how kinky!).

Nominees: Crushed Froot Loops, Raspberry Jam, Crème Egg/Sprinkles

Winner: Crème Egg/Sprinkles (used on Crème Egg) – this rim is so fun to lick off the glass afterwards… probably better than the drink itself!

Behind-the-Scenes Biggest Mistake

I’m not perfect (although the ladies beg to differ) and some things don’t go according to plan while I’m at the office trying to come up with wicked cocktails for you, my little sippers. Sure, the end product looks fantastic, but along the way, there has been a couple misses, en route to cocktail glory.

Nominees: Pineapple Juice gone bad, Key Lime Pie recipe missing Galliano, Flatliner foul-ups (I had to make and drink three!)

Winner: Key Lime Pie – Galliano isn’t an ingredient in any of the traditional recipes, but I chose to add it for a special flavour… then I forgot to add it entirely when I first made the drink!

Most Difficult Drink

Not every drink we’ve made for Sip Nation has been easy-peasy. Some have, in fact, been quite difficult and taken a couple attempts to master. Others have been a pain in the butt because of how messy the results were.

Nominees: Groundhog’s Shadow, Pretty Vegas, Flatliner

Winner: Groundhog’s Shadow – it took numerous versions to get one that looked even remotely like a groundhog and we suffered numerous defeats (layers that did not layer, groundhogs that did not stay in the ground or were too hard to see) before we found one that looked somewhat like what we were going for and tasted decent.

Best Photo

This award might as well be presented to Mrs. Sip, who has taken a majority of the pictures that have been nominated. Cheap plug: all you little sippers should check out our Gallery page to see all the good work done by our art department.

Nominees: Cosmopolitan, Breakfast of Champions, Crème Egg

Winner: Cosmopolitan – I’m still not sure how this photo came together, but it’s pretty wicked and my personal favourite!

Top Shot

One of my favourite features of the 365-day drink challenge has been Super Saturday Shot Day. It’s been fun switching things up every weekend and putting together a usually delicious shooter to throw back.

Nominees: On the Cusp, Tootsie Roll, Windshield Wiper Fluid

Winner: On the Cusp – like I could pick anything else when this was the shot I, THE Sip Advisor, created for Mrs. Sip’s birthday! (and after all, I don’t want to end up sleeping on the couch!)

Best Drink

This is the big one of the night. Another category that was very hard to narrow down, but using a complex algorithm (just spelling that word seems like it needs its own complex algorithm), I’ve whittled down the choices. In actuality, I went on the basis that these were drinks I quickly made doubles of because I enjoyed them so much.

Nominees: Limestone Breeze, PAMA-Jama, Blue Razz Buzz

Winner: Pama-Jama – all good candidates, but this is a drink I now crave often! Disagree? Let me know!

Drink #100: Milestone (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

0.5 oz PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur
0.5 oz Cointreau
Dash of Lemon Juice
Top with Champagne
Garnish with Berries on a Spear

So, there you have it, the first Sip Advisor awards. I’d like to thank the viewers who have visited the site from 72 countries around the world. We will do this again at drink #200, so join us for all the fun and mayhem the next 100 drinks will surely hold!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
This original recipe was pretty good. I enjoyed using PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur again even with the addition of champagne (not one of my favourite alcohols), the overall product was worthy of a milestone post.

March 31 – Crème Egg

Posted on March 31, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Wascally Wabbits

With all the fun Mrs. Sip and I are having in Las Vegas this weekend, I nearly forgot that it is also Easter. Fear not, my little sippers, The Sip Advisor Bunny has visited and to come up with an original recipe for us all to enjoy! It’s the season of the bunny (meaning copious amounts of sex, right?), so let’s enjoy our chocolate and jelly beans, partake in this soon-to-be classic cocktail and salute our favourite rabbits!

Bugs Bunny – Looney Tunes

The one who started it all, this stinker has been a thorn in the side of Elmer Fudd, Yosemite Sam, Porky Pig, Daffy Duck, and so many others… and we love him for it. Everyone wishes that they could be as clever as Bugs when dealing with individuals who are hunting you, building on top of your home, or who are door-to-door salesmen. I could do without the wrong turns at Albuquerque, though!

Babs and Buster Bunny – Tiny Toon Adventures

Babs and Buster Bunny, no relation (as they used to say), have been known to cause much mayhem at Acme Looniversity and the surrounding Acme Acres. They stand in the long shadow of Bugs Bunny, but have shown glimpses of being able to live up to the hype that surrounds their comedic team. All they need are a few more anvils to drop on the heads of Montana Max, Plucky Duck, and the rest of the gang and they should be in good shape.

Br’er Rabbit – Song of the South

This little troublemaker has done everything from subject his mother to an undiagnosed ulcer from worry to cause racial accusations to be thrown at the Walt Disney Corporation. Br’er Rabbit is also responsible for your faithful Sip Advisor getting soaked numerous times on Splash Mountain as I try to rescue him from the dastardly duo of Br’er Fox and Br’er Bear.

Greg – Greg the Bunny

Despite being a short-lived series (only 13 episodes for its original Fox run), Greg the Bunny worked his way into the hearts of viewers thanks to his kind and gentle nature. While other Fabricated-Americans in his world are alcoholic thespians (Warren DeMontague, aka Professor Ape) and angry has-beens (Rochester Rabbit), Greg is about as normal as a puppet can come – except for the fact he has to be held up by his ears in order to use a urinal.

Lunch with Gilbert Gottfried… where do I sign up?

Roger Rabbit – Who Framed Roger Rabbit

The patty-cake playing, chaos inspiring, rabbit may be goofy looking, but you gotta respect anyone who can land a babe like Jessica Rabbit. How did Roger ever get together with a girl who isn’t bad, but is drawn that way, you ask? Well, he makes her laugh, giving hope to all us guys out there that may not be 10’s in the looks department, but are at the very least 8’s on the personality scale!

Honourable mention goes to the Playboy Bunny, who despite not doing much of anything, has been a beacon of naked ladies for years and could probably top this list thanks to the male demographic. We drink to you, good bunny!

Drink #90: Crème Egg (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Rim glass with Crème Egg middle and festive sprinkles
1 oz Irish Crème
1 oz Crème de Cacao
1 oz Chocolate Liqueur
Top with Milk
Garnish with Mini Eggs

I hope everyone out there has a wonderful Easter. Next year, this will have to make an appearance on your brunch menu!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
While this turned out to be one of the best looking drinks we’ve made so far for the site, the overall taste was a bit of a let-down. The Crème Egg rim was a wonderful touch, but I expected more from the various ingredients. Perhaps a little tweaking will find the right mix.

Sip Advisor

The Good, The Bad & The Bubbly

Category Archives: Sip Advisor Original Recipes