September 28 – Das Boot

Festival Follies

Today marks the beginning of Oktoberfest, causing drinkers everywhere to rejoice in an orgy of beer bashing and mischievous good times. While Germany is home to this fiesta, the festival is celebrated the world over… well, maybe not in those loser countries where the people don’t drink… did I mention how loser that is? I would love to celebrate a true Oktoberfest sometime in my life. Here are some other festivals that top my list of must-dos:

La Tomatina – Spain

Throwing tomatoes at a bunch of strangers… count me in! I wonder how many people end up with seed-related injuries as a result of La Tomatina. Similarly, Spain also has the Grape Throwing Festival, while Italy is home to the Battle of the Oranges. What is with Europeans and wanting to throw food at each other… starving folks around the world must be pissed about this!

la-tomatina

Holi Festival – India

While I really don’t want to ever go to India, the country’s Holi Festival looks really neat. On the plus side, many areas around the world have ripped off the event and I might not need to ever go to India. Basically anywhere you can find people throwing coloured dust at each other will get the job done. The Color Me Rad event takes place around the world, but includes a 5km run (which you have to pay for!), so eff that!

Calgary Stampede

There’s that Canadian content again! I would love to attend this cowboy and cowgirl dream sometime and it wouldn’t be too hard, given my proximity to Calgary and having a few friends based there. From what I’ve heard, the partying is crazy and there are free pancake breakfasts each morning to help you sober up and get ready for another day of tight jeans, plaid shirts, ten gallon hats and leather boots. Yeehaw!

Calgary Stampede

That’s my type of gunslinger!

Dia de los Muertos – Mexico

Otherwise known as Day of the Dead, this Mexican event puts Halloween celebrations to shame. If you’ve never seen a graveyard in Mexico that is a sight everyone needs to behold at some point in their life. Mexicans honour their deceased family and friends with decorative grave sites, which they maintain with great regularity. All the candles and embellishments are quite impressive.

Carnival/Mardi Gras – Brazil/New Orleans

So long as you don’t get robbed, beaten, sexually assaulted, or murdered, then this would be a fun time. Regardless of where you celebrate it, you’re sure to see a horde of beautiful women, from Brazil’s butt shakin’ beauties to all the tourists who take their game to New Orleans and drunkenly expose their naughty bits in exchange for beads and other trinkets.

Mardi Gras Kitty

Pingxi Lantern Festival/Obon Festival – Taiwan/Japan

These two festivals involve lighting lanterns and releasing them with the Pingxi Lantern Festival finishing with lanterns being released into the sky, while the Obon Festival ends with lanterns being let loose to float away in the water. The whole concept was used in Disney’s Tangled and was one of the most beautiful scenes I’ve ever witnessed in 3-D.

Songkran Water Festival – Thailand

I’m a huge fan of getting wet (take that as you may!) and any event that supports the worship of water is fine in my books. The Thai celebrate by soaking each other with all available items from buckets to squirt guns to hoses. My weapon of choice would be water ballons because then you also get that wonderful splat sound when you hit your target!

Songkran Water Festival

San Fermin Festiva – Spain

Known worldwide thanks to its main event of the Running of the Bulls, I don’t really need to attend for much else. Just let those suckers loose, get out of my way so I can have a little run before finding safety and it’s on to the next thrill. Who doesn’t want to risk getting gored into oblivion by a 2,000-pound beast? Surprisingly, only 15 people have died since 1910, as a result of the running.

Pride Festival – Worldwide

Mrs. Sip and I have yet to attend a Pride Festival, despite living in a part of the world that has a thriving LGBT community. The issue is that we’re always away over the August long weekend (usually in remote areas) and not around to partake in celebrations. We will have to rectify this if we ever have a free long weekend in the future.

Pride Festival

Monkey Buffet Festival – Thailand

Feeding monkeys and partying… that’s an easy sell for the Sip Advisor! Even after I was attacked by monkeys in Indonesia, I still love the little bastards. One can only hope that after feeding them, they will hang around long enough to share a drink with the ol’ Sip Advisor and then we can become true bros complete with swapping e-mail addresses and friendship bracelets.

Oktoberfest – Germany

The Sip Advisor has a decent amount of family living throughout Germany, so this is another festival that could be enjoyed legitimately with little trouble. Every time Mrs. Sip or I are in the country, it’s a boozefest, so why not combine the greatest beer festival known to man in our travels and visitations. At least we honour this tradition at home when we can’t make it to Munich, in person.

Drink #271: Das Boot (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Das Boot Shooter

  • 0.75 oz Jagermeister
  • 0.75 oz Sand Berry Liqueur
  • Garnish with an Orange Slice

I’ve already experienced St. Patrick’s Day in Dublin, so I left that off the list and it’s a good thing too. If I want to hit all of these events, it looks like I’m going to have a pretty busy calendar!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
I had originally wanted to use a Strawberry Liqueur Mrs. Sip and I picked up in Germany for this shot, but when I popped open the bottle, the liquid had solidified. I was able to get some out, but not knowing the status of it, I decided to err on the side of caution and toss the stuff in favour of Sand Berry Liqueur, also found in Germany. My boot shot glass really came in handy for this recipe!

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July 22 – Cincinnati Lunchbox

Burger Bar

Very few things compliment a tall, cold mug of beer like burgers do. I’ve been privileged to enjoy a number of fine selections. Here are some of my favourites:

Legendary Burger – White Spot

A darling of Western Canada (particularly the province of British Columbia), I can rarely remember a trip to White Spot that didn’t result in ordering this burger. You scan the menu every single time and even contemplate ordering something other than the norm, but you always end up asking for your favourite and you never regret doing so. The secret recipe Triple-O sauce is to die for and should be available to purchase.

Legendary Burger

Prime Rib Burger – The Keg

Ordered off of its bar menu, most Keg restaurants will allow this to be selected even if you’re in their main dining room, as well. The ones that don’t are listed near the top of my always growing ‘enemy list’. This burger is absolutely fantastic. The seasoning, combined with all the toppings makes for one tasty meal. Take my advice and throw in an extra buck for the bacon. Unbelievably, it’s one of the cheapest items on the restaurant’s menu to boot!

Whopper – Burger King

Flame broiled, yes please! The thing I love best about the Whopper is that it is loaded with toppings. Toppings are essential to any burger enjoyment and the King has read that message loud and clear. I appreciate that the chain has found its way into a number of airports, giving me an opportunity to have a decent meal on the run. Burger King is also one of the few food vendors in movie theatres around my parts, taking advantage of hungry moviegoers.

whopper

Big Xtra – McDonalds

Although I can only find this burger (known as the Big N’ Tasty in the U.S.) at Wal-Mart-connected McDonalds, it is worth the trip. In my opinion, all burgers need essential ingredients and this meal covers all the bases. You have your lettuce, tomato, mayo, ketchup, pickles, and onions… all the colours of the rainbow. Perhaps the only thing missing is a couple strips of bacon, but we’ll let that transgression pass.

Big Crunch – KFC

I had to include a chicken burger on this list and the best place in the world for bird meat is hands down KFC. I haven’t had a Big Crunch in a couple years, but just writing this has me craving the delicious 11 secret herbs and spices recipe. A little tip for chicken burger connoisseurs, try dipping your meal in ketchup before each bite, adding another wonderful flavour to the mix.

Big-Crunch

Kobe Beef Sliders – Milestones

Perhaps the only thing better than one big burger is three mini burgers! Most of my beef selections come sans cheese, but in this case, I’m happy to leave the mozzarella on. The Milestones sliders are topped with crispy onion straws and are accompanied by a delicious sesame mustard sauce for dipping. The appetizer is perfect for sharing and Mrs. Sip and I have been known to gorge ourselves on a couple starters prior to skipping dinner!

Bacon Deluxe – Red Mill Burgers

I learned of Red Mill Burgers watching Man vs. Food, as host Adam Richman toured a selection of restaurants in Seattle, Washington. Thankfully, that means the franchise’s locations are only a two-hour drive away for Mrs. Sip and I. Well worth it, I would say! When we arrived, the line-up for ordering was out the door and it didn’t take long to understand why. Loaded with toppings and the delicious Mill Sauce, I was in burger heaven and I enjoyed the euphoria the entire two-hour trip home!

Drink #203: Cincinnati Lunchbox

Cincinnati Lunchbox Drink Recipe

  • 1 oz Amaretto
  • Top with half Orange Juice and half Beer (I used GIB Hefeweizen)
  • Garnish with Orange Slice

All this talk of burgers has got me really hungry… and all this mentioning of beer has got me really thirsty. Why won’t someone satisfy my needs!? I don’t ask for much. Only to be fed, thirst quenched, and legions of fans who will do my bidding!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
Not a bad beer cocktail, but a little sweet and not really memorable… it doesn’t live up to the burgers listed above. I was looking forward to this drink, as Hefeweizen Beers are my favourite, but I think the Orange Juice took over too much.

 

May 3 – Sidecar

Sidekicking

The Sip Advisor has gone through numerous sidekicks over the years. I don’t have a good safety track-record with my associates and therefore find it hard to reel in replacements. Perhaps these guys and gals are looking for work. If so, please submit your resumes and head shots (females only) to Sip Advisor Headquarters, PO Box 84148. Best of luck to those applying!

Robin – Batman

Batman can get a lot of crazy stuff done on his own, but add in Robin and you have quite the dynamic duo. The ‘Boy Wonder’ is the quintessential sidekick. He knows his role as the number two and doesn’t overstep the boundaries of his part… except for his constant “holy, [insert something to do with their current predicament], Batman” musings.

batman-robin-cheap-budget

Dr. Watson – Sherlock Holmes

Without Dr. Watson around, surely Sherlock Holmes would go insane under the weight of his own superior intelligence. Watson is the calming force that helps Sherlock work his way through mysteries and there’s the odd time where the good doctor’s problem solving ability is crucial in cracking a case. Mmmm, cracking a case… right, we’re not talking about beer.

Barney Fife – Andy Taylor

While Sheriff Andy Taylor was the straight man and level-headed leader of the Mayberry Police Department, his counterpart, Deputy Barney Fife was his inept, hapless partner. Together, they made a good pairing that kept the town safe and orderly, although Fife usually needed Taylor’s help to keep him safe from himself.

barney-fife

Dale Gribble – Hank Hill

While Dale is the kind of sidekick that causes more issues than he solves, he certainly keeps things interesting for best friend Hank. Dale’s paranoia has frequently got the best of him and one has to wonder if his career as a pest removal specialist – and all those toxic chemicals – isn’t to blame for some of his delusions. Hank has to reel his friend in from time to time, which is easy for the serious leader.

Milhouse Van Houten – Bart Simpson

And everything’s coming up Milhouse! It’s hard to tell sometimes if Milhouse is friends with Bart because he likes Bart or if he just wants to remain closer to his crush and Bart’s sister, Lisa. If there isn’t some degree of friendship between the two boys, then Milhouse has gone through a lot just for his unrequited love. Bart has caused him to get into a great deal of trouble, and when pressed as to why he’s friends with Milhouse, Bart struggles to answer, saying it is largely due to “geographic convenience”.

Bart and Milhouse

Barney Rubble – Fred Flintstone

Fred’s little buddy Barney is always up for Fred’s shenanigans and despite warning him of what the end results could be, Barney often goes along with the scheme. The two pals are both members of the Loyal Order of Water Buffalos and even work together at the Slate Rock and Gravel Company quarry. That’s a lot of time to spend with one person, but if it works for them, who am I to judge?

Mini-Me – Dr. Evil

The pint-sized clone of Dr. Evil may be small in stature, but he’s just as wicked as his “daddy”. Mini-Me also has the advantage of being at a perfect level for biting adversaries in the shin or delivering a devastating low blow. You can never stay too mad at the little guy, though, because he has such a sweet grin… even if it is hiding his evil side.

kinopoisk.ru

Diddy Kong – Donkey Kong

These two primates play off of each other so well that they have been able to keep Donkey Kong Country safe from evil crocodiles and slithering snakes on multiple occasions. Donkey Kong played the role of mentor to his young protégé Diddy, as they bashed their way over all the baddies who meant them harm. Diddy (no relation to Puff Daddy) even branched out and took the lead in his own game, letting Donkey enjoy a comfortable retirement in his banana horde. He hasn’t been seen in years!

Dwight Schrute – Michael Scott

In his constant pursuit of a management position at the Dunder-Mifflin paper company, Dwight Schrute idolizes manager Michael Scott, even if his treatment at the hands of his boss isn’t always the kindest. Dwight is often placed into the role of Assistant to the Regional Manager, which he claims means Assistant Regional Manager. Meanwhile, he’s stuck doing Michael’s laundry and other menial tasks, while others are promoted ahead of him.

Drink #123: Sidecar

Sidecar Cocktail

When I was younger, Broski Sip was my sidekick and partner in crime. He’s since moved onto other endeavors, while I continue to pursue worldwide awesomeness. Mrs. Sip was offered his spot, but she declined, wanting to live a long life. So, I ask, who has the intestinal fortitude to join me in this pursuit? You will never regret it!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I’m learning quickly that I really enjoy Apricot Brandy. It very nicely accentuates the already delicious Triple Sec. The cocktail, as a whole, was good and an optional sugar rim could have been added for those who want an even sweeter taste.

April 9 – Toucan

Angry Advisor

Let’s see: coffee drinkers… check; religious zealots… check; birds… hmmm, haven’t ranted on that yet!

I hate birds. Just downright don’t like them. All they do is poop on people… I should know, their bombs have struck me twice in my life and that’s something you just don’t forget.

Kittypult

Not to mention Mrs. Sip and I currently have a bird infestation on the balcony of our place. When we first moved in, a bird had made a nest on the ground of the balcony and we had a baby pigeon. Not realizing what a mess that would turn out to be, we named it Baby Buster and then ignored the problem for several months. Before we knew it, our balcony became a shelter for the stupid creatures who completely ignored the wooden owl that’s supposed to scare them away. And once again an owl has failed me.

Now, it looks like a war zone of bird crap out there. So much so, that we are afraid to open that sliding door, even on the hottest summer days, fearing that we could be breathing in toxins from these vermin. Stupid birds.

Even birds seem to hate other birds. They seem to fight more than warring homeless people.

gothandhippiebirds

And it’s not just real birds that piss me off. Animated ones draw my ire, too. Tweety: stupid and annoying. The Roadrunner: stupid and annoying. Woody Woodpecker: stupid and annoying. Sorry about that, the adjective generator in my brain was overloaded the other day and the repair guys are supposed to show up sometime between 9am and 5pm today.

To be fair, I respect the poke playing hawks in the new Old Spice deodorant commercial, but that’s only because I fear them as well. Ducks (Donald, Scrooge, Daffy) and penguins (Opus, Chilly Willy, Wheezy) get a pass because they entertain me. And surprisingly, I do love me some Angry Birds (there’s something so satisfying seeing birds get launched into objects and the resulting mass destruction!).

I cheer when Peter Griffin fights the giant angry chicken. I cry every time Tweety and The Roadrunner get the better of Sylvester J. Pussycat and Wile E. Coyote, respectively, and my blood pressure rises every time I’m woken up by the cooing of a filthy bird on my balcony.

In closing, I am taking steps forward in organizing the Anti-Bird Movement (apparently I’m not alone). Our offices will be located in the Swiss Alps, so high in altitude that birds cannot find us and therefore we need not worry about their poop, their weird birdy noises, or their ability to steal French fries. While this drink may have been enjoyable, I’m feel great shame and sadness every time I make a drink that is bird-related. On the plus side, once you slam this cocktail, that’s one less feathered fiend in existence.

Drink #99: Toucan

Toucan Martini Cocktail

  • 1 oz Malibu Rum
  • 1 oz Peach Schnapps
  • Top with half Orange Juice and half Lemon-Lime Soda
  • Garnish with an Orange Slice covered in Coconut Shavings

Tomorrow marks our 100th post here at The Sip Advisor. I hope you’ll join us, as we look back at the first 100 days of this drinking challenge, through wild recipes, insane garnishes and wonderful time spent together.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
I may be guilty of kind of screwing this one up. Despite using Orange Juice, I was surprised to see how clear the drink was. After photos and drinking, I realized that I forgot to shake the OJ and that was why it was so clear. It still tasted decent, so I guess the essence of Orange Juice is good for something.

March 26 – The Crush

Sir Mix-A-Lot

I like to think of myself as an equal opportunity mixer and that is why I love playing with ingredients that don’t often get placed into cocktail recipes. Here are some of my favourites to work with and some I have yet to try, but am itching to crack open!:

Root Beer

My first favourite pop when I was a wee lad, I still enjoy root beer and now I can take that love to a whole ‘nutha level with my cocktail mixing. Root beer adds a different flavour to recipes, compared to other dark pops. The hint of vanilla can be a very nice touch and add a twist to any number of drinks. Barq’s, A&W, Mug… it don’t matter which one you’re using. They’re all good around these parts; just make sure to practice safe mixing.

Root Beer

Apple-Lime Juice

This has got to be one of my favourite grocery store finds in recent years. Every single drink I make with this juice turns out amazing. This all coming from a guy who used to be completely friends-off with apple juice after medicine I was once given to knock me out looked like apple juice, smelled like apple juice, but brother, it wasn’t apple juice. That reminds me, I need to grab another carton of this elixir!

Cream Soda

Imagine my surprise when I bought a can of Fanta cream soda recently and it came out clear. Thinking that my vision had finally quit on me after years of television and computer screens (plus the aforementioned drinking problem), I checked with Mrs. Sip to see if this was actually the case. I had expected the usual pink colour that accompanies cream soda, but this new clear look can be a good thing. It means that there is an option if you want the flavour, but not the colour. So, be careful if you want to make a pink-coloured drink to get cream soda that is actually dyed this hue.

My boys Ernie and Bert enjoy a cream soda... this could have been a telling sign, if you catch my drift...

My boys Ernie and Bert enjoy a cream soda… this could have been a telling sign, if you catch my drift…

Orange Crush

I’m shocked that orange-flavoured sodas don’t get used in more drinks. By comparison, one bartending website has 86 recipes for orange soda (and very few that actually interested this Sip Advisor), while there are a whopping 2,360 concoctions featuring orange juice. Today’s drink is an original recipe, which I hope you’ll all enjoy… I know I did.

Watermelon Juice

I have a can of Arizona watermelon juice that I’m just dying to experiment with. I love watermelon and cry on a daily basis when it’s out of season as I go through watermelon withdrawal. Sure you can still get your hands on the juicy fruit (not the gum), but you’ll probably pay an arm and a leg for it and good luck making drinks hopping around the bar with one hand to hold the shaker. What will I make with this juice… stay tuned to find out!

Drink #85: The Crush (An Original Sip Advisor Recipe)

Crush Cocktail

  • 1.5 oz Wiser’s Spiced Whiskey
  • 0.5 oz Peach Schnapps
  • Top with Orange Crush (or other Orange Soda)
  • Garnish with Orange Slice

Perhaps we should hold a reader vote to find out which rare mixer I use next… I welcome your comments, although I’ll likely just go ahead and pick a winner on my own volition!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
Using Orange Crush for cocktails has rekindled my love for this type of soda. Here, it tasted well with the Peach Schnapps and Spiced Whiskey and I’m glad I thought of combining the three ingredients. Definitely one for fans of the hue.

March 22 – Southern Frost

Meteoro-losers

Straight up: I hate weathermen, weather reports, weather gossip, weather channels, weather balloons, weather vanes (also hilariously known as weather cocks), and generally anything else having to do with weather reporting or prediction.

Mrs. Sip, on the other hand, is always updating me on what the weather will be like where we live and most frustratingly, what it will be like during our next vacation destination a month before we’re set to be there (I think this trait is hereditary, so hopefully it’s not passed down to our children… *shudder* children). Weather guys and gals can’t even get their forecasts right the day of, so how the hell can they accurately predict what the weather will be like a month ahead of time?

Weathermen Wrong

In any other industry, if you were wrong more than half the time, you would be fired and never work in that field again. For some reason, meteorologists get a pass and I’m not cool with that. But what’s more bizarre is that WE KEEP LISTENING TO THEM! (And I obviously do not include myself in that “we” because I’m clearly in the small percentage of the population who has leveled up and evolved beyond weather reporting).

I say the only way to check the weather is to look out your own window and examine what the sky is doing at that present time. If you live in a stable environment, then this should be all you need to do for weeks at a time. I live in a volatile, urban, rainforest (kind of wish I lived in the Rainforest Cafe), where you can have multiple weather patterns in a single day. Still, the check-out-your-window process works fine for me.

No Rain Indoors

I think a fitting punishment for all weathermen would be for them to be sucked into their own green screens and be mauled by the various monsters that have come to life thanks to CGI special effects. The hotties that are put into the role of weatherwomen, regardless of education and training, can be spared, provided they perform their duties in the buff, going forward. Now there are some chances of precipitation I can get behind!

I can’t believe there’s a whole channel dedicated to weather. What do I care if it’s snowing in Eastern Canada or if there’s a heat wave in Dubai? The Weather Channel should be turned into another sports channel, giving airtime to games like Dodge Ball, Ultimate Frisbee, and Hackeysacking. It could be called ESPN Stoner and it would be a haven for advertisers like Doritos, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut and Red Bull (I may have said too much now. I call dibs on the sports channel idea).

Back to weather reports, I think we can all agree that it only provides entertainment to seniors and for that reason alone, I suppose we can allow it to continually exist. I have great respect for our elders and I want them to enjoy a happy retirement and twilight years… they’ve earned it. *Sniff* Now I’m getting all emotional. Let’s get on with today’s drink.

Drink #81: Southern Frost

Southern Frost Drink Recipe

  • 1.5 oz Southern Comfort
  • Top with half Cranberry Juice and half Ginger Ale
  • Garnish with an Orange Slice and a Raspberry

Quite frankly, the only weather phenomena I want to hear about is one that I can drink. At least it will help me get through the daily weather report. God speed!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
While the drink tasted great, I was especially happy with the garnish job I put together. I’ve found Southern Comfort to be a really solid liquor contribution and the combo of Cranberry Juice and Ginger Ale works really well together.

February 1 – The Preacher

Losing My Religion

The first month of the 365-day challenge here at The Sip Advisor is in the books and what a month it was. We had visitors from all around the world and had fun taking shots at everyone from the entire east coast of North America, to couples choosing terrible baby names, to fellas looking for love in all the wrong places.

Today, in theme with the featured cocktail, I will look at some of the craziest religions out there. I have various beliefs and my own code that I follow (not a Dexter-like serial killer code, of course), but I’m not religious in any way. If you believe in something, than you have every right to. I just find these factions to be a little too far out there for my own liking.

Snake handler

Pentecostal Snake Handlers

Like the great intellectual, daring, and handsome hero Indiana Jones, I have no weaknesses… except snakes… god I hate snakes. So, given that I also don’t like church, it seems like two strikes to combine the two to form a religion and the third strike comes when you learn that the founder of the modern movement (among other leaders and parishioners) died from a venomous bite. There’s even a court case from Alabama (big surprise there), in 1991, where a pastor was convicted of attempted murder and sentenced to 99 years in prison after he forced his wife to put her hand in a tank filled with rattlesnakes. Divorce (of snakes?) was forbidden by his church, so this was his bright idea as to how he could get out of the marriage.  Snakes on a Plane would have been a drastically shorter movie if it had taken place in a church full of religious zealots and I can just see Samuel L. Jackson: “I have had it with these motherfuckin’ snakes in this motherfuckin’ church.” Famous Follower: Moe Szyslak (The Simpsons)

Mormonism

They don’t drink. Period. I am down with having multiple wives taking care of me, though, minus the multiple children I would have to take care of. Famous Follower: Mitt Romney (U.S. Presidential Candidate)

Scientology

Scientology

Any religion that’s origin starts with the words “Galactic Confederacy”, “alien ruler”, and hell, “spacecraft” are hard to take seriously. If you want to see a good tearing apart of Scientology, watch any episode of South Park that deals with the religion. They even angered one of their own voice talents (Isaac Hayes, who voiced Chef), who ended up quitting the show, despite the fact the animated comedy rips on every single religion at one time or another. Famous follower: While many Hollywood stars are members of the Church of Scientology, perhaps to gain connections in the industry, Tom Cruise is far and above the most recognized face of the religion and has seen his own career (and possibly marriage, too) take major damage as a result of his devotion.

Raëlians

Another faith that has its origins in alien beliefs. These people use the swastika as a symbol of peace… oh yeah, that’s going to go over really well. Then they have the gull to ask for territory in Israel to put an embassy for extra-terrestrials (and we’re not talking about the bicycle flying, Reese’s Pieces eating type)… even I know that’s beyond stupid… and I wrote the book on stupid. It’s called The Idiot’s Guide to Being an Idiot by The Sip Advisor. However, I will give them credit for their belief that women should be able to go as topless as men can. Equality for all, right? Famous Follower: Rael’s Girls posed for an October 2004 spread in Playboy magazine.

Pastafarians

Pastafarians

Hulk Hogan once ran a restaurant called Pastamania, but I don’t think even he showed such high praise and devotion to pasta, like these folks do. These peeps aren’t that bad, though, preferring to take a light-hearted view towards religion. Amongst their beliefs are that a Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe after drinking heavily (really sounds like my type of deity), that pirates are divine beings and that every Friday is a holy day. Wow, where do I sign up? Famous Follower: One site I was reading said Jesus Christ was a Pastafarian… I should really find more reliable sources!

Church of Euthanasia

My main issue with this group is how can the church exist when the followers advocate that people kill themselves? It seems a little oxymoronic that they hold events like any other church, but if they truly follow what they believe, then shouldn’t they all be dead? Their gripe is with the overpopulation of the earth and therefore they advocate suicide, abortion, cannibalism (only of already dead people, duh!) and sodomy (because it doesn’t result in procreation) . Now I’m listening! Famous Follower: If I listed someone here, would they have to kill themselves? In that case, I pick Elmo.

Jehovah's Witnesses

Jehovah’s Witnesses

You don’t believe in birthdays and Christmas??? Fuck it, I’m out! No further discussion… I’m out. Famous Follower: Toss up between Michael Jackson and Lark Voorhees (Saved by the Bell)… gotta give it to Lark!

I can’t even begin to delve into the cults and religions based on race that exist in the world. My head is spinning from all the information I’ve already had to research. Let’s just get on with the drink o’ the day!

Drink #32: The Preacher

The Preacher Cocktail

  • 1.5 oz Spiced Rum (I used Kraken Black Spiced Rum)
  • 0.5 oz Amaretto
  • Top with Cranberry Gingerale
  • Garnish with Orange slice

For those who want to subscribe to The Church of Sip, we convene every single day here. We will exercise your demons and get you drunk while doing so. Amen!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (5 Sips out of 5):
Cranberry Ginger Ale has to be one of my favourite finds throughout this project. Then you add Kraken Black Spiced Rum and Amaretto and you have the makings of an amazing cocktail.