October 29 – Angel of Death

Posted on October 29, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Trick & Treat

Halloween is right around the corner and I’ve been studying up on the event. I want to make sure that every little sipper out there has a wonderful night. So, here is some info and tips on how to make that happen:

Facts about Trick-or-Treat

Drink #302: Angel of Death

1 oz Cupcake Vodka
1 oz Fluffed Marshmallow Vodka
Top with Milk
Garnish with Chocolate Shavings

I hope everyone has their candy purchased, costumes picked, and pumpkins carved. Have an amazing evening, y’all!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
This drink was a decent dessert option and the Chocolate Shavings were an enjoyable touch on top of the cocktail. Like the name suggests, the recipe seems angelic, but it can kill, too!

October 28 – Witch’s Brew

Posted on October 28, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Happy Hunting

Drawing from my years of experience as a world renowned candy hunter, I’ve come up with some great tips for all the little sippers out there that are looking forward to a wicked Halloween haul. Some of these tricks and tip may not be of the highest moral value, but they’ll fill your pillowcases quicker than a pillow (just made that up… probably needs a little tinkering)!

Tip #1: Candy Clusters

The best way to maximize your Trick or Treat time is to find areas where there are numerous doors to knock on in a tight space. Apartment and town house complexes or even neighbourhoods where houses don’t have much yard space between lots are perfect to rack up the goodies without tuckering yourself out too much.

Tip #2: Return Trips

If a house is giving out something really awesome (full-sized bars, bags with multiple candies, etc.), there is nothing wrong with returning to that residence later in the evening. Don’t pester the poor people with repeated visits, but perhaps hit the place again on a second go-round of the neighbourhood.

Tip #3: No Pack Mentality

While you want to be with your friends and share this wonderful experience, don’t get bogged down by being in too big of a group. Let’s be honest, only a few of the people you’re usually with are actually your friends. Stick to smaller groups which makes it easier to travel and get your treat at each house before moving onto the next stop.

Tip #4: Courtesy Counts

Be very thankful and energetic at each stop. You never know if your costume, behaviour or other intangible might earn you a bonus piece of candy. Also, if you drop by the home of someone you know, make sure to acknowledge them, as your relationship to them or their kin may benefit your treat haul.

Tip #5: Split Shift

It won’t be too long before you’re running out of room in your bag and are tired of lugging the heavy sack around. There’s no shame in planning a route that lets you stop off at home, dump out your candy, and hit the road again for round two. Or, if with friends, make sure one of your homes is along the route for a recharging point.

Tip #6: Home Collection

Each time you go in and out of your own house, make sure to grab a treat for yourself (and one for your imaginary friend!), courtesy of your own parents. The leftover will largely be yours anyway, so you’re just getting ahead of the game.

Tip #7: Longevity Wins

Make sure you’re up for a full night of candy hunting. At the end of the evening, some folks might be giving out more than the usual one piece in order to get through their stock and be able to shut their lights off. This is when you pounce and take advantage of the fact that you have better cardio and durability than all the others. Your training has paid off!

Drink #301: Witch’s Brew

1.5 oz Raspberry Vodka (I used Absolut)
Top with half Tonic Water and half Cranberry Juice
Splash of Blue Raspberry Mixer
Garnish with Berries

Anyone else out there have any suggestions for the wee little sippers who will be hitting the streets in just a few days’ time? Feel free to pass them along.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I was pleasantly surprised by this cocktail. While I’m not a big Tonic Water fan, it didn’t detract from this drink, perhaps because I covered it with the Berry garnishes and the Blue Raspberry Mixer. This is one case where I wish I had access to liquid nitrogen to create a fog effect.

October 27 – Dracula’s Kiss

Posted on October 27, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Long and Winding Road

Well, my little sippers, here we sit, at the precipice to 300 drinks. It is a time of remembrance, of celebration, of extreme joy! I’m so happy to share these moments with you. Let’s do a quick group hug and get on with the awards!

Most Difficult Drink

I’m not sure all you little sippers know how hard I work in my pursuit of perfection for this site. And that’s not to say you should know, or even care. All I’m stating is that the effort I put into this site rivals and often surpasses my quality of work at my real job. I love you folks that much!

Nominees: Wicked Witch of the East (tracking down of garnish and layering issues); Roasted Mellow (had to hollow out marshmallow, which couldn’t always hold the liquor long enough); Jell-O Shot (they were fun to make once I had a process down, but took a fair bit of time)

Winner: Wicked Witch of the East – First, I delayed this drink multiple times because I couldn’t track down a suitable broomstick garnish to be used as a stir stick. Then, I went ahead and made one myself and I am not an arts and crafts buff. We’re not even getting into how the layering effect didn’t work because the broomstick was frustrating enough!

Best Site Searches

It will be hard to top the last two victors: “how do I get a blow job at new york new york las vegas” and “how to use trollop in a sentence”, but I’m sure there are some game applicants out there. Sometimes I’m baffled that certain searches have led readers to this site… like these gems!

Nominees: puppies farting green air; is adrenalin responsible for making a body fly in the air when electrocuted; jimmy snuka porno; sensual woman stripper in ms santa claus costume; how to complain about a sip advisor

Winner: “how to complain about a sip advisor” – What have I done to offend this little sipper? Is there a process for complaining about me? Which board would complaints about my work (few as they may be) be delivered to? So many unanswered questions, but you can bet this member of Sip Nation will have their membership revoked.

Best Garnish

The garnish game is something I enjoy, but also find vexing at times. When I don’t have the ingredients I want/need or they aren’t behaving how I’d like them to, it can be tough. Somehow, we get the job done, night in and night out. I hope you all appreciate the results.

Nominees: Skittles, Toasted Marshmallow, Fish Candies

Winner: Fish Candies (used on Water of Life) – Thanks to Ma Sip for letting me borrow some of the fish candies she always has out for guests during the summer pool months. The trick to getting them to cooperate with this drink was to alternate between layers of ice and then a couple fish, so as to make it look like the candies were swimming.

Top Shot

I love our Super Saturday Shot Day page; a place where I can assemble the best shooters from around the world. Check it out sometime for some recipes that will turn your drinking night upside down!

Nominees: Kinky Tease, Rainbow Cookie, Bazooka Joe

Winner: Kinky Tease – I mean, come on, of course I’m going to give the nod to a shot I invented myself! I did what any good barkeep would, put together two liqueurs (Kinky and Pomegranate) that taste good on their own and figured they’d be even better united. Mission accomplished!

Best Photo

I’ve taken over the reins of photo taking and editing at the Sip Advisor headquarters, pushing Mrs. Sip out of her positions with the company. While we thank Mrs. Sip for her service in those areas, there were simply other positions I preferred to put her in… if you catch my drift! Check out our Drink Menu for complete photo listings!

Nominees: Drunk Monkey, Happy Birthday-Tini, Campfire Martini

Winner: Happy Birthday-Tini – There wasn’t a clear-cut favourite this time around, as there had been for our 200th drink awards. That said, I love how the sprinkles highlighted this delicious drink. The whole package really made my birthday cocktail a perfect celebratory piece!

Best Drink

As usual, we finish the evening with our top award, Best Drink. Previous winners have included the PAMA-Jama and Raspberry Mojito. Like the Oscars, we have expanded our nominees for this award so they can all claim that they were Sippy-nominated!

Nominees: Happy Birthday-Tini, Village Idiot, Wonderful Night, Old Fashioned, Undercover Squirrel

Winner: Wonderful Night – I had to go with this cocktail because of how all the ingredients (there’s six of them) came together to surprise the pallet with notes of everything from peppermint to vanilla to citrus. Each sip was a new adventure!

Drink #300: Dracula’s Kiss

Rim glass with Grenadine
1.5 oz Cherry Vodka (I used Grey Goose Cherry Noir)
Top with Cola
Splash of Grenadine
Garnish with Garlic Clove

This may very well be the last awards ceremony of this project, but fear not, my little sippers, I have big plans in store for 2014 and beyond!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I’ve wanted to try the Grey Goose Cherry Noir Vodka with Cola for some time and this was finally my chance. They work pretty well together. I thought the Garlic garnish was a clever little touch! My only disappointment with the drink was how the Grenadine Rim looked good in actuality, but didn’t really translate to photo form.

October 26 – Bazooka Joe

Posted on October 26, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Tales from the Candy-keeper

There are numerous urban legends based on candy. Here are some of the juicier tales out there:

Recharge on Mars

Rockers sure know how to party. That’s why this legend involving Rolling Stones front man Mick Jagger, singer Marianne Faithfull, and a Mars chocolate bar persisted for so long. When a party at guitarist Keith Richards’ home was broken up by police, rumours began flying that Jagger was interrupted while eating a Mars bar that was inside Ms. Faithfull (I’ll let your imaginations put that one together). The story was entirely untrue, but I bet Mars bar sales skyrocketed, with deprived lovers looking to spice up their sex life!

You’re right, Mick! It is a pretty funny story!

Pop Rock N’ Roll

As the story goes, if you mix Pop Rocks with Cola, this diabolic concoction would cause you to explode. The legend was enhanced when people claimed that Mikey, the Life Cereal ad campaign kid (you know, “Hey, Mikey likes it!”) was an original victim of the blast. A similar tale has recently surrounded Mentos and Cola, because the two products do combine to create fizz and can launch a bottle into orbit. The cute Pepsi girl of the 90’s was said to be a casualty. In both cases, no one has actually died from ingesting the two items together.

Hole-in-One

Creator Clarence Crane was said to have designed Life Savers with a hold in the middle after his daughter tragically died choking on a candy. The hole was to allow oxygen to pass through a person’s body, even if stuck in one’s throat. The reality, however, is quite a bit different. Crane fashioned his new invention after the floatable inner tubes that were becoming all the rage following the Titanic disaster in 1912.

All Wrapped Up

Legend had it, that if you found an image of Indian, complete with bow and arrow, on your Tootsie Roll or Pop wrapper, you would be the recipient of any number of prizes, ranging from Tootsie treats for life to a new bicycle to unimaginable wealth and celebrity (I added that last one myself!). I would have loved to have found that Indian, as I very much enjoy the Tootsie products. Sadly, the story is completely fabricated.

Jaw Dropper

It’s hard to believe this one is actually true, but it has been verified by the fine folks at MythBusters. If you place one of those massive jawbreakers in the microwave it will explode. Why someone would ever put a jawbreaker into the microwave is a yet-to-be answered question, but here’s my theory: why not. Those jawbreakers are a pain in the ass (or more aptly, mouth) to get through and perhaps someone tried to accelerate the process.

Spider Yum

When Bubble Yum gum hit the market and became quite popular, stories began to circulate that the gum contained such grossities as spider eggs, spider legs, or spider webbing. These were all probably started by a rival gum company in hopes of curtailing the popularity of the world’s first soft gum. Bubble Yum’s parent company fought these rumours publicly with full-page newspaper ads ensuring people of the quality of their product. Most people actually listened and Bubble Yum lived on.

Razor’s Edge

Remember when we were all wee little sippers and when we returned home our parents sifted through our well-earned Halloween stash (probably contemplating which treats they’d take for themselves) to make sure there was no evidence of tampering? Good thing they did. In 2000, James Joseph Smith stuck needles into Snickers bars he planned to hand out and one boy bit into the chocolate bar. Smith was arrested and charged with adulterating a substance with the intent to cause harm… asshole!

Pick Your Poison

Similarly, the threat of poisoned candy given out at Halloween has always existed, but the only evidence of this occurring happened when some sick bastards poisoned their own children, including one loser who laced his kid’s Pixy Stix with cyanide to collect a $20,000 life insurance policy. Most cases were just overeating by the public (no surprise there) and not waiting to hear the actual results of why someone became sick.

Drink #299: Bazooka Joe

Rim glass with Bubble Gum
0.5 oz Irish Crème
0.5 oz Banana Liqueur
0.5 oz Blue Curacao

Are there any candy urban legends you’d like to pass my way? I’m a skeptical one, but I’ll give it a chance!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I liked this shooter and always have. Truth be known, when I was taken out on my 19th birthday for my first legal drinks, this was the first shot that was ever ordered for me. I still marvel at how these three ingredients combine to fake the taste of bubble gum, but somehow it all comes together.

October 25 – Candy Corn

Posted on October 25, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Rest in Peace

Most people aren’t very comfortable going through cemeteries and you can count the Sip Advisor as one of those folk. That said, there are some really beautiful and unique graveyards out there. Here are some from the around the world, that have to be seen to be believed:

Merry Cemetery – Sapanta, Romania

Each person’s tombstone is marked with art that depicts that person or a memorable scene from their life, with the images joined by poetry to tell the story of the piece. Elements of humour are often found in the prose, as the local culture believes that death is a moment of joy with a better life to come. The Merry Cemetery has become a national tourist attraction.

Cementerio General – Santiago, Chile

Over two millions people have been interred at the Cementerio General. Every day people neighbour the plot space taken up by former presidents and other nobles of the country. The largest cemetery in South America features tombs piled on top of each other in rows that seem to stretch forever. This final resting place is decorated extensively with flowers and other mementos.

Père-Lachaise – Paris, France

Home to the remains of musician Jim Morrison (which causes rock music to often bellow through the cemetery) and writer Oscar Wilde (fans leave lipstick kisses on his tomb), among others, Père-Lachaise features numerous statues and winding streets lined with crypts. Joggers even use the sight for their daily exercise routine.

Forest Lawn – Los Angeles, California

Resting place for some of the world’s greatest stars, this site is located on the Hollywood Hills and overlooks some of the city’s studios below. Before it was home to famous corpses, it was the setting for D.W. Griffith’s climactic battle scenes in ‘The Birth of a Nation’. The place has been described as a “theme-park necropolis” thanks to all the dignitaries laid to rest there.

Waverley Cemetery – Sydney, Australia

Overlooking the Pacific Ocean, this cemetery has a wonderful view for those visiting or even interred at the site. The graves of many of the folks who shaped the country of Australia are located in Waverley Cemetery, as well as over 200 sites for casualties of war.

Lone Fir Cemetery – Portland, Oregon

This cemetery allows families to plant trees and flowers near the burial spots of their loved ones, causing Lone Fir to become a community garden of sorts as a result. Many of the Chinese immigrants who helped build the city of Portland are interred here. The Pioneer Rose Garden is also part of the property.

Haunted Mansion – Disney Parks

It’s always a treat to go through the cemetery area of the Haunted Mansion queues and read the clever passages on the tombstones. These markers are more than just entertainment for guests, though. They honour some of the notable members of the Disney organization. For example, Leota Tombs has a plot here. She was the inspiration for Madame Leota on the ride.

Drink #298: Candy Corn

Rim glass with Crushed Candy Corn
1.5 oz Cupcake Vodka
0.5 oz Amaretto
Top with half Orange Juice and half Milk
Splash of Club Soda

Perhaps after researching all these interesting graveyards, I won’t feel so apprehensive anymore while visiting or even seeing a cemetery… or perhaps everything will remain unchanged!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
Setting up the Candy Corn rim on this drink was a complete pain in the ass, as pieces kept on disintegrating and not behaving as I had hoped. That said, the cocktail actually tastes like Candy Corn… and I should know. I stupidly ate every single piece that fell apart, so now I’m an expert on what that particular treat tastes like. If I ever see a piece of Candy Corn again, it will be too soon!

October 24 – Nerds

Posted on October 24, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Terrible Treats

There’s not a lot of candy out there that isn’t good, but some items draw some serious ire for the Sip Advisor. Here’s what tops the unwanted list:

Black Jelly Beans/Jube Jubes

I’ve grown to accept both of these evil devices, as my tastes have expanded, but there’s a reason why in a bowl of jelly beans or jube jubes, the black ones are the last to be finished, often with a clump of them remaining and some brave soul being dared to rid them from the world. And no, I’m not a racist, except towards those damn purple people, but that’s another story for another day.

Jelly Bellies

You just never know what you’re going to get with the mixed jelly bean flavours and that mystery can really stress a fella out. BeanBoozled packs even capitalize on this confusion with identically coloured candies on opposite ends of the taste spectrum. Some doppelgangers include Coconut or Baby Wipes, Tutti-Fruitti or Stinky Sock, Caramel Corn or Moldy Cheese, and Juicy Pear or Booger. I do have to give the company credit for their Cocktail Classics line, featuring Mojito, Bellini, Margarita, Pina Colada, Cosmo, and Daiquiri flavours!

Jawbreakers

The favourite candy of dentists everywhere! I’m always worried when eating a jawbreaker that I’m going to wreck my teeth. I’m just not patient enough to let the hard candy become soft, which is probably why I enjoy chewy Gobstoppers for their light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel ability. I remember having one of those massive giant jawbreakers when I was really young and having to smash it on the floor to make a piece small enough to fit in my mouth… then it was basically a choking hazard. Ah, the wonders of childhood!

Peeps

I’ve never really been a huge fan of marshmallow based candies and cookies. Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’d rather have a cream filling! Are you done giggling? How about now? Seriously, I’m just not that into marshmallows. Perhaps roasting them over the fire and exacting revenge on them via flames is the closest I can say I come to enjoying marshmallows. I do make concessions for marshmallows as part of baking, such as Rice Krispy Squares or Ma Sip’s famous delicacies.

Push Pops

The thing I hated about these candies is that your spit would end up all over your finger and hand as it came through the device holding it. I thought we were supposed to teach kids not to suck on their fingers and grow the eff up! There seems to be some sort of disconnect between the two ideas there. Similarly horrible were Ring Pops, although I do look fabulous in designer candy jewelry!

Milk Duds

Junior Caramels are much better, but when Mrs. Sip can’t locate any for her movie popcorn, she’ll grab Milk Duds, which can be very hard to chew and you normally end up choking on the piece as you try to swallow. We’ve also taken a shine recently to the Caramilk or Rolo bites that were released not that long ago. Basically, as long as the chocolate and caramel is soft, we’re pretty happy. Once Mrs. Sip dumps them into her popcorn, though, I no longer partake.

Drink #297: Nerds

1 oz Melon Liqueur
1 oz Blue Curacao
Top with Lemonade
Garnish with Nerds

Which candies do you deplore? We should have a candy burning festival and as all the awful items burn in hell, we should rejoice in the purity of our favourite treats and stuff ourselves full of glorious vices!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2.5 Sips out of 5):
I certainly wouldn`t associate Nerds or this cocktail with the ‘Terrible Treats’ moniker. I tried to put the Nerds on the rim of the glass, but they were too heavy to stay in place. To compensate, I just poured them on top of the cocktail and I think that worked well enough. The drink didn’t blow my mind and left me a little disappointed. Not to mention that I think all these candy drinks are slowly giving me diabetes!

October 23 – Skittles

Posted on October 23, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

It’s Good to be Bad

There are some horrific villains out there in movie land; characters that keep fans thirsting for sequel after sequel. Here are some of the best in the business!

Freddy Krueger – A Nightmare on Elm Street

I have to admit that after I watched the original A Nightmare on Elm Street for the very first time as a little sipper, I didn’t want to go to sleep that night. The thought of a monster like Freddy Krueger being able to attack a person in their dreams was a novel idea. With his signature bladed claw, I’d love to see a showdown between Freddy and Wolverine from X-Men. Both are virtually invincible and rely on slashing weapons. It would be one hell of a bloody battle.

Leatherface – The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

With a mask made of human skin, a bloody butcher’s smock, and an ear-shattering chainsaw in his hand, Leatherface is certainly one of the most imposing baddies in film history. The Leatherface character and costume was adopted by professional wrestling, mostly in Japan. I have seen Leatherface the wrestler live and it’s quite the sight to see a big hulking guy chase audience members around with a revving chainsaw (no blade, of course).

Jigsaw – Saw

I enjoy playing games, but I don’t think I’d ever want to cozy up to Jigsaw with a Monopoly board or Yahtzee Dice. I’d probably end up in one of his horrific traps, being challenged to justify my wasted existence as the Sip Advisor (I don’t think it’s a wasted existence, but John Kramer – the man behind Jigsaw – would probably think so). Billy, the creepy doll Jigsaw uses to deliver messages to his victims is as deranged and disturbing as dolls come. He would not fit in with The Muppets.

Ghostface – Scream

Although Ghostface has been parodied in the Scary Movie franchise, it’s still a pretty haunting character when you go back and watch any of the Scream films. The franchise has been brilliant with its story of a town of teens being terrorized by a spook that kills silently, but taunts its victims with phone calls prior to their death. The design of the mask is based on the famous painting ‘The Scream’ by Edvard Munch and was a legit Halloween costume before the films were made.

Hannibal Lecter – Silence of the Lambs

More of a cerebral monster here, but Hannibal Lecter also has a vicious side. Anthony Hopkins is synonymous with the character, his portrayal winning the star a Best Actor Oscar in 1991, but did you know Lecter was played by someone before Hopkins? Brian Cox played Lecter (or Lektor as the character’s name was changed to for copyright reasons) in the 1986 film Manhunter. John Lithgow also auditioned for that role and given his work as a serial killer on Dexter, he would have been great here, as well.

Pennywise – It

I’m not much of a fan of clowns to begin with, but after watching the It TV mini-movie, I’ll never look at those folks the same again. Pennywise, in clown form, has to be one of the most disturbing villains Stephen King has ever dreamed up… even without the sharp teeth and claws. I have to say that the TV mini-movie is really good for the first half, but totally falls apart in the latter half. Watch with caution or wait for the rumoured re-adaptation to finally come to fruition.

Michael Myers – Halloween

Committed to an asylum as a youngster after murdering his older sister, Michael Myers escapes and wreaks havoc on the Halloween season, tormenting his victims and racking up kills. Myers emotionless face is a frightening image to behold and would certainly stimulate nightmares. Perhaps even more scary is the fact Myers has lived through so many sequels that he seems unstoppable. Happy endings be damned!

Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13^th

Hockey can be violet enough, but when you put a mask on a killer seeking revenge and arm him with a machete, you’re certainly asking for trouble. Thanks to staff negligence, Jason Voorhees drowned as a boy at Camp Crystal Lake and returns to the site of his tragic end to mass murder camp counselors and others engaging in immoral behaviour. I won’t spoil the ending of the original movie, but Jason isn’t even the killer until the second film in the franchise.

Drink #296: Skittles

1 oz Kinky Liqueur
0.5 oz Vodka
0.5 oz Blue Curacao
Top with half Orange Juice and half Lemonade
Garnish with Skittles

Who’s your favourite horror movie baddie? Have I grossly neglected a villain on this list? I guess they’ll be hunting me down now!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
I always have a desire to “taste the rainbow” and while this cocktail was good to start with and looked fantastic, its score was bumped up even higher when the Skittles garnishes melted a little bit in the drink and gave it an extra boost of candy flavour. It was also fun to eat the little treats as you drank your way through the recipe.

October 22 – Tootsie Pop

Posted on October 22, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Candy Mascots

While every brand of cereal seems to have had a mascot for commercial purposes, finding mascots in the world of candy proved to be a little more difficult. Still, after diligent research, here are some of the best of the bunch:

Bart Simpson – Butterfinger

A lot of companies have capitalized on the enduring success of The Simpsons, highlighted by Bart Simpson becoming the mascot for Butterfinger chocolate bars. Most commercials would feature Homer trying to get his grubby paws on Bart’s chocolate, only to be thwarted by his rotten son. Then, Bart would deliver a catchphrase like “Nobody better lay a finger on my Butterfinger!” After 12 years of disassociation, Bart will return to the brand sometime in the very near future.

Mr. Owl – Tootsie Pops

This pompous prick of a bird (aren’t they all horrible) took pride in stealing people’s Tootsie Pops, licking them twice and then chomping into the entire treat. Meanwhile dumb kids stood around seeing if the vermin would solve the age old question of how many licks it takes to get to the center of the lollipop. Thanks to Mr. Owl’s lack of cooperation, Universities have actually wasted time testing Tootsie Pops lickability with widely ranging results. Some studies say it only takes 150-350 licks, while others say it’s in the thousands.

Red and Yellow – M&Ms

Red and Yellow are a comedic pair with Red being a smart ass leader to Yellow’s less intelligent lackey persona. This usually means that Red gets the guys into some sort of trouble, despite Yellow’s warning of issues ahead. M&Ms have also added Green, Brown, Blue, and Orange characters over the years. Brown is probably the most recognizable as she’s a sassy female, spurning the advances of men who want to be with the candy-coated snack.

Yipes – Fruit Stripe Gum

Yipes the Fruit Stripe zebra has outlasted his entire family to remain as the sole mascot of the brand. He was originally introduced with Connor the Tiger, as well as an unnamed elephant and mouse. Yipes is known to be quite active, as tattoos packaged with the gum portray him rollerblading, snowboarding, playing sports, and, of course, eating grass. Using the zebra mascot, Fruit Stripe raised $100,000 for the preservation of endangered animals in 1996.

Bazooka Joe – Bazooka Joe Bubble Gum

Starting in 1954, Bazooka Joe appeared on comic strips wrapped around pieces of Bazooka Joe Bubble Gum, along with characters such as Pesty, Mort, Hungry Herman, Toughie, and Walkie Talkie. The comics were discontinued in 2012 thanks to a drop in bubble gum sales (a sad day, indeed!). Despite losing his comic strip gig, rumours have circulated that Bazooka Joe may have a future in the movie industry. Plans for a film adaptation of the comics were announced in 2009.

Floyd D. Duck – Bubble Yum

This water bird is one bad ass punk, complete with nose ring, frosted tip mohawk, spiked collar, and… ankle bracelet??? Isn’t an ankle bracelet something you’d expect a young, sexually-charged female ducky to be adorning? Anyway, Floyd D. Duck blows bubbles in the face of authority and won’t take any guff from pigs – both the animal kind and the police variety. Can ducks even blow bubbles? It seems like a beak of that size would prevent the lip formations necessary for bubble making.

Willy Wonka – Willy Wonka Candy Company

The candy company born from Roald Dahl’s classic children’s novel Charlie and the Chocolate Factory came into being in 1971, the same time the first film based on the novel was released. With Willy Wonka, the new enterprise had a perfect mascot and spokesman already built in. Being portrayed by Gene Wilder and Johnny Depp doesn’t hurt, either. Today, the company sells products such as Nerds, Gobstoppers, Laffy Taffy, Pixy Stix, Runts, and Kazoozles… everything you’d expect from the eccentric candy mogul.

Freddo – Cadbury’s Freddo

Mrs. Sip and I first learned of Freddo the Frog when she was spending a semester in Australia. Apparently the frog-shaped chocolate bars are also sold in New Zealand, Ireland, the U.K., and Zimbabwe, of all places. Freddo has been featured in two online animated series, expanding his backstory, and was even part of Cadbury’s 2006 recall over a possible salmonella scare. That’s one crazy life for this amphibian.

Drink #295: Tootsie Pop

0.5 oz Chambord
0.5 oz Amaretto
Splash of Vodka
Splash of Sweet & Sour Mix
Splash of Cola
Garnish with a Tootsie Pop

It seems like candy mascots got their greatest availability of work from bubble gum products. Remember that the next time you’re trying to scrape the stuff off of the bottom of your shoes or you touch a gob of gum left under a table or seat by some inconsiderate asshole!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
This cocktail tasted like a Tootsie Pop and I loved eating the suckers I used for garnishing after the drink was done. It heightened the entire experience. Perhaps most enjoyable with the drink was how Chambord and Sweet & Sour Mix work together for a sour raspberry flavour.

October 21 – Gummy Worm

Posted on October 21, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Macabre Memes

There are some hilarious Halloween memes out there and I’ve taken the painstaking task, upon myself, to collect these gems for all you little sippers. Grab your favourite bevvy and enjoy some laughs on my behalf!

What a cardinal idea! Imagine all the times you’d hear, “And I would have gotten away with it all, if it wasn’t for you meddling kids!” Now you just have to decide which member of the Scooby Gang to go as. Fred’s ascot creates too many questions, as does Shaggy’s drug addiction. I guess this one goes to the dogs!

A brilliant theory which makes me want to track down the JW’s that disturb me on lazy weekend afternoons and repeatedly knock on their doors… until they give me some damn candy, of course. And when those treats never come to fruition, you continue to knock and piss them off until they realize what they have been doing for years is just as annoying.

I’m not sure why they settled on 1983, but given that was the year I was born, I can only assume I was the one who originally came up with this amazing concept! Halloween is a prevert’s dream and thanks to all the women who dress however they damn well like (women’s lib!!!), dudes are treated to a visual feast of epic proportions. Smile on, my brothers!

I’m learning so much with my research for this post. You could probably put together a couple months worth of TP supply if you just pissed off a few teenagers and let them trash your place. Unfortunately, if those teens chose to go the egging route, you’d have a more difficult time of multi-purposing their prank, unless you had a number of skillets available and could quickly gather up the yolky goop.

Don’t worry little kitty, we’re almost through the season of ghouls and ghosts… although, that’s not what really sets off our pets, it’s the constant doorbell ringing of Trick-or-Treating kids and the setting off of fireworks and firecrackers. My familiy’s little ones do not enjoy Halloween night. Hopefully they find a good hiding spot to rest through the evening of torture.

Drink #294: Gummy Worm

1 oz Cointreau
1 oz Raspberry Vodka
Splash of Blue Curacao
Top with Lemon-Lime Soda
Garnish with Gummy Worms

I hope you enjoyed these laughs and if you see anything you want to send my way to return the favour, by all means, go right ahead!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2.5 Sips out of 5):
I subbed in Cointreau because I didn’t have the Mango Vodka the original recipe called for and that may have detracted from the drink. The cocktail did taste sort of like a Gummy Worm and the garnishes went over quite well.

October 20 – Jolly Rancher

Posted on October 20, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Candy Class

Well friends, the week you’ve all been waiting for is finally here: Candy Cocktail Week! Today we take a crash course on the candy industry thanks to a wonderfully crafted infographic. This proves once again that the Sip Advisor is the only education you need!

How the Candy Industry Started #Candy #Industry #Started #Infographics

Drink #293: Jolly Rancher

2 oz Vodka
1 oz Midori
Top with Cranberry Juice
Garnish with Jolly Ranchers

When you go out and share your newfound knowledge with all you friends, just remember who made you the intelligent candy connoisseur you’ve now become… your welcome!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
Candy Cocktail Week got off to a great start with this drink that actually tastes like the candy. It was hard to get the usual sticky Jolly Ranchers to stay on the glass long enough to snap a couple photos, but I got it done. The Melon Liqueur was particularly nice in this recipe.