October 23 – Skittles

It’s Good to be Bad

There are some horrific villains out there in movie land; characters that keep fans thirsting for sequel after sequel. Here are some of the best in the business!

Freddy Krueger – A Nightmare on Elm Street

I have to admit that after I watched the original A Nightmare on Elm Street for the very first time as a little sipper, I didn’t want to go to sleep that night. The thought of a monster like Freddy Krueger being able to attack a person in their dreams was a novel idea. With his signature bladed claw, I’d love to see a showdown between Freddy and Wolverine from X-Men. Both are virtually invincible and rely on slashing weapons. It would be one hell of a bloody battle.

Freddy_Krueger

Leatherface – The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

With a mask made of human skin, a bloody butcher’s smock, and an ear-shattering chainsaw in his hand, Leatherface is certainly one of the most imposing baddies in film history. The Leatherface character and costume was adopted by professional wrestling, mostly in Japan. I have seen Leatherface the wrestler live and it’s quite the sight to see a big hulking guy chase audience members around with a revving chainsaw (no blade, of course).

Jigsaw – Saw

I enjoy playing games, but I don’t think I’d ever want to cozy up to Jigsaw with a Monopoly board or Yahtzee Dice. I’d probably end up in one of his horrific traps, being challenged to justify my wasted existence as the Sip Advisor (I don’t think it’s a wasted existence, but John Kramer – the man behind Jigsaw – would probably think so). Billy, the creepy doll Jigsaw uses to deliver messages to his victims is as deranged and disturbing as dolls come. He would not fit in with The Muppets.

Ghostface – Scream

Although Ghostface has been parodied in the Scary Movie franchise, it’s still a pretty haunting character when you go back and watch any of the Scream films. The franchise has been brilliant with its story of a town of teens being terrorized by a spook that kills silently, but taunts its victims with phone calls prior to their death. The design of the mask is based on the famous painting ‘The Scream’ by Edvard Munch and was a legit Halloween costume before the films were made.

Scream

Hannibal Lecter – Silence of the Lambs

More of a cerebral monster here, but Hannibal Lecter also has a vicious side. Anthony Hopkins is synonymous with the character, his portrayal winning the star a Best Actor Oscar in 1991, but did you know Lecter was played by someone before Hopkins? Brian Cox played Lecter (or Lektor as the character’s name was changed to for copyright reasons) in the 1986 film Manhunter. John Lithgow also auditioned for that role and given his work as a serial killer on Dexter, he would have been great here, as well.

Pennywise – It

I’m not much of a fan of clowns to begin with, but after watching the It TV mini-movie, I’ll never look at those folks the same again. Pennywise, in clown form, has to be one of the most disturbing villains Stephen King has ever dreamed up… even without the sharp teeth and claws. I have to say that the TV mini-movie is really good for the first half, but totally falls apart in the latter half. Watch with caution or wait for the rumoured re-adaptation to finally come to fruition.

Pennywise

Michael Myers – Halloween

Committed to an asylum as a youngster after murdering his older sister, Michael Myers escapes and wreaks havoc on the Halloween season, tormenting his victims and racking up kills. Myers emotionless face is a frightening image to behold and would certainly stimulate nightmares. Perhaps even more scary is the fact Myers has lived through so many sequels that he seems unstoppable. Happy endings be damned!

Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th

Hockey can be violet enough, but when you put a mask on a killer seeking revenge and arm him with a machete, you’re certainly asking for trouble. Thanks to staff negligence, Jason Voorhees drowned as a boy at Camp Crystal Lake and returns to the site of his tragic end to mass murder camp counselors and others engaging in immoral behaviour. I won’t spoil the ending of the original movie, but Jason isn’t even the killer until the second film in the franchise.

Drink #296: Skittles

Skittles Drink Recipe

  • 1 oz Kinky Liqueur
  • 0.5 oz Vodka
  • 0.5 oz Blue Curacao
  • Top with half Orange Juice and half Lemonade
  • Garnish with Skittles

Who’s your favourite horror movie baddie? Have I grossly neglected a villain on this list? I guess they’ll be hunting me down now!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
I always have a desire to “taste the rainbow” and while this cocktail was good to start with and looked fantastic, its score was bumped up even higher when the Skittles garnishes melted a little bit in the drink and gave it an extra boost of candy flavour. It was also fun to eat the little treats as you drank your way through the recipe.

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June 20 – Screwdriver

Tool Time

The screwdriver is one of the handiest tools known to man… and not just because of its alcoholic properties! Here are some other inventions that we just couldn’t live without:

Roomba

This little creation will travel across your home and vacuum your floors as it goes. It’s perfect for pet fur, dirt, and other small messes. Hell, the thing is probably (scratch that, IT IS) smarter than me. If can change directions after bumping into an object and detect falls, as well as dirty spots. On Parks and Recreation, Tom Haverford even attached an iPod dock to his Roomba, creating DJ Roomba, which throws down the sickest beats while working its way around your party.

Roomba

Batteries

For everything from TV controllers to sex toys, batteries are an essential part of everyday life. Without them, we’d have to get off our asses to change the channel. One of the WORST things that can EVER happen to you is when batteries die on you. The worst for me was the Wii video game controller, which always seemed to go out while I was in the middle of a big boss battle. Oh, first world problems!

Pen

The pen is mightier than the sword (although the Game of Thrones folks would beg to differ) and as a scribe myself, I’ve felt great power when I wield the pen of destiny and begin etching my thoughts of intelligence. All us great philosophers feel a sense of omnipotence (that’s omnipotence, NOT impotence!) when writing. If only anybody would trust us enough to listen.

Chainsaws

If Leatherface has taught us anything, it’s that a chainsaw means business. Relied upon for everything from efficiently taking down a tree to terrorizing teenage travelers, the chainsaw must be loved and feared all at the same time. When you hear that engine revving, it’s probably wiser to run for safety rather than sticking around, hoping it’s just a lumberjack in the forest.

girl chainsaw

Perhaps I ran away much too quickly!

Umbrella

What I love about the umbrella is its dual-function ability. Yes, it can keep you dry on a wet, rainy day, but it can also double as a weapon. For example, I’ve found that swinging it at cars that cut you off in crosswalks might not be in the best interest of calming a situation, but it sure brings a smile to your face.

Toilet

Can you imagine life if we still had to use primitive things like holes in the ground and pots and pans to do our business!? And what would you do when you indulge in one too many of the Sip Advisor’s wonderful recipes? Thank you Mr. Toilet!

Drink #171: Screwdriver

Screwdriver Cocktail

  • Rim glass with Orange Sugar
  • Muddled Oranges
  • 1.5 oz Vodka (I used Absolut Citron)
  • Top with Orange Juice
  • Garnish with Orange Slice

I’m just waiting for someone to chirp that I’m a valuable tool and while you would be 100% correct, let’s not start throwing stones in glass houses. Which tool have I missed? Let me know your favourite and we discuss at length why you’re wrong!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
A very simple cocktail that had to be done at some point during this 365-day cocktail project. It was delicious, as I spiced things up with Muddled Orange Wedges and Fruitopia Orange Groove (thanks McDoanlds!), instead of plain old OJ. The results were very respectable, making me think I might have a future in this business!