November 13 – Warp Pipe

Posted on November 13, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Game Genie

Today we continue our look into the Sip Advisor’s favourite vidya games. This isn’t an article about the greatest games of all-time, just my top picks from childhood to adulthood, where that inner-child just never really went away. I’m not a massive video game guy, but I’ve always played this or that along the way!

Super Mario Bros.

This is one of the games that really boosted the video game industry and made Nintendo a household name. I’d say my favourite Mario game was Super Mario World (SNES), but I have also enjoyed all the original NES titles, as well as releases for Gameboy, N64, and Wii. The Wii version was great because you could play along with your friends all at the same time, although it usually ended up with us “accidentally” killing each other. One thing is certain: the games were far superior to the ill-advised movie!

Wrestling Games

As I’ve admitted before, I was a huge wrestling fan in my pre-teen and teenage years. Some of the best wrestling classics came out during this period, especially the games made by THQ in the late 90’s/early 2000’s. The company had the WCW license first and then switched over to WWE, putting out one amazing offering after another. My friends and I spent countless hours fighting our issues out in battle royals. The best part was, if you were eliminated, you had another chance with the next entering character.

GoldenEye 007

Similar to the wrestling games, thousands of hours were wasted maiming each other in this N64 classic. Even those who weren’t gamers in the slightest knew about GoldenEye and had probably played at some point. While the single player missions were spectacular, the multiplayer killfests were even better. Our group would play where any damage killed you and would alternate between remote mines and rocket launchers being the feature weapon.

Plants vs. Zombies

While I’m not the biggest fan of tower defense games, this entry, which has you defending your home against an invading horde of zombies, using plants with their own special powers is a total delight. A sequel has been released, but as of yet, it’s only available to losers with iPhones (sorry, I’m a little bitter it’s not available on computers like the original or even for Android users… that misses a lot of the market). I’m sure it will eventually be in my possession, but the waiting is the hardest part (thanks, Tom Petty!).

Donkey Kong Country

Oh man, I love these games so much, particularly the Super Nintendo trilogy. The re-launch of the series on the Wii was also a spectacular offering for the eyes and the ears (the fingers not so much, as they had to do all the work!). The thing that’s so amazing about these games is that they’re so visually beautiful with rich colours and the music is fantastic. Combine that with smooth gameplay and wonderful level layouts and this is one of the best 2-D side-scrollers to ever exist.

Rollercoaster Tycoon

I love amusement parks and all the rides they contain. Therefore, when these games were released, I was an early adopter. It was so much fun to build your own parks and achieve whatever tasks were outlined. I didn’t play around too much with rollercoaster design except to launch unsuspecting riders off of a dangerously built ride and send them flying through the air to a fiery death!

Tetris

There’s just something about Tetris that is so addicting. I especially enjoyed the N64 edition (The New Tetris), which Broski Sip, Cousin Sip, and I used to play a lot, challenging each other to see who could last the longest without dying. The more lines you made, the faster you were able to build the world’s greatest landmarks. Much like Donkey Kong Country, the music in this franchise has always been top notch and keeps you wanting to play the game.

Drink #317: Warp Pipe

0.75 oz Blue Curacao
0.5 oz Melon Liqueur
Top with Mike’s Hard Limeade
Garnish with Lime Wedges

That wraps up our look at my favourite video games of all-time. What are some of your favourite electronic pastimes? Perhaps you’ll steer me towards a new addiction, you pusher!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
Once again, we go to The Drunken Moogle for this recipe, as they seem to have the market cornered on awesome video game-themed drinks. I used the split-sized glasses to help accentuate that image of the pipes in Super Mario Bros. This backfired on me a little when I went to split them up for Mrs. Sip and myself and she decided to nap instead, leaving me with two cocktails to down. Luckily, they were pretty light and tasty and I enjoyed the double treat!

November 10 – Movember Rain

Posted on November 10, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

‘Stache Central

In honour of all the dudes out there that are growing mustaches that make their partners less attracted to them, all in the name of raising awareness for men’s health, particularly prostate and testicular cancer, here’s a look at some of the greatest whiskers in the media world!

Magnum PI – Tom Selleck is so associated with his trademark facial hair that the network wouldn’t allow him to get rid of it for his role on Blue Bloods. Can you believe Selleck turned down the role of Mitch Buchannon (later went to David Hasselhoff) on Baywatch because he didn’t want to be a sex symbol… uh, hey Tom, too late, buddy!

Hulk Hogan – Hogan’s Fu-Manchu plays a vital role in his image as a do-gooder and leader of Hulkamaniacs everywhere. So much so, that when he finally became a bad guy and leader of the reprehensible New World Order, a dirty black beard was added to show he had fully embraced the dark side.

Ned Flanders – Everyone’s favoruite religious zealot has had many storylines center around his nose neighbour. Usually when Ned is forced to shave the facial hair, good things come his way. Surprisingly, when he refused to rid his upper lip of fur, the omnibenevolent one was labeled and rebel and troublemaker.

Yosemite Sam – Sam has such a wicked moustache that it actually encompasses his entire face, including around his eyes. Sam is a mentor of mine, as just like him, I am prone to obscenity-laced tirades when I’ve been outsmarted by a no-good varmint.

Captain Hook – Whether the cartoon character or the live action depiction by Dustin Hoffman, Captain Hook’s trademark cookie-duster is comical and to be feared all at the same time. If you were in his position, wouldn’t you also grow a mustache and do anything else to distract from the hooked hand!?

Snidely Whiplash/Boris Badenov/Dick Dastardly – It seems that back in the day, you couldn’t be an animated villain without sporting some sort of soup strainer. These are some of the most despicable dudes to ever exist and they evilness was only accentuated by their lower brow.

Ron Swanson – The man’s man of the Parks and Rec crew just wouldn’t carry the same respect if he was sans mustache. He is such an aficionado that he’s gone on to teach others how to grow a great mustache and NBC even has t-shirts with Swanson’s likeness available in their shop.

Mario, Luigi, Wario & Wailuigi – These four guys have a yearly competition to see who has the best lady tickler. My vote goes to Wario and his lightning bolt-esque flavour saver!

Machete – What would an anarchist assassin be without a badass ‘stache!? For Machete, the facial fur is all part of the look meant to strike fear in the hearts of those he is paid to dispose of.

Cleveland Brown – In flashbacks, it’s revealed that Cleveland has had a rockin’ ‘stache since his teenage years and when his son shaves it off in an act of revenge, we learn why. Apparently Brown’s voice is created thanks to the hairs and without the mustache, it sounds squeaky and pathetic.

Inspector Clouseau – Clouseau’s mustache was based off of fellow fictional investigator Hercule Poirot, but I’ll take the funny man over the more serious detective any day… providing it’s the Peter Sellers version and not the Steve Martin one.

Borat – I just can’t imagine Borat without his goofy lip foliage. The Kazakhstan journalist has been an inspiration to me and millions around the world, showing us all what lengths we should go to in order to get a story done.

Ron Burgundy – What would a 1970’s newsman be without an epic crumb catcher? In fact, some posters for the upcoming Anchorman sequel prominently focus on the icon’s mustache and that’s all you really need to know before going into the theatre!

J. Jonah Jameson – The Spiderman hater sports a push broom similar to one Adolf Hitler… could there be a connection there? I’m sure Spiderman and all his employees would think so.

Evil Abed/Evil Cartman/Evil Spock – For some reason, a character can be turned “evil” simply by adding facial hair to their usual look. I’ve experimented with this theory every Movember, by becoming a complete and total dick throughout the month!

Drink #314: Movember Rain

Muddle Berries and Mint Leaves
1 oz Vodka
0.5 oz Chambord
Top with half Grapefruit Juice and half Pineapple Juice
Splash of Lemon Juice
Dash of Simple Syrup
Garnish with Mint Leaves and a Berry

Who possesses your favourite upper lip caterpillar? Unfortunately, this is one area where you won’t all be shouting my name. I just can’t seem to grow great facial hair. Good, yes… but great… not for the Sip Advisor.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
There’s a lot going on in this cocktail and I think that detracts from the overall enjoyment on the drink. When you get a focused sip of the Chambord, for example, it’s very good. On other sips, however, you get a mix of different juices and so on and it’s hard to pinpoint a taste. I’m not a fan of weird, combined, unidentifiable flavours, so it’s too bad that happens in this recipe. I tried to make the mint leaves look like a moustache… mission accomplished!

November 8 – Sweet Tweet

Posted on November 8, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Technologically Traditional

Yesterday, we looked at my favourite apps and while I’ve embraced the games and information tools available to tablet and smart phone users, there is a lot of technology I refuse to adapt to. Kicking and screaming, I’m trying to hold onto my familiar way of life. Here are some items I refuse to give up or learn.

Laptop Mouse

It may surprise some that the Sip Advisor, this internet guru you’ve come to love, still uses a mouse with his laptop. I hate that little square built into the actual computer that you’re intended to use. I find that it completely slows my progress down. I occasionally use Mrs. Sip ‘s laptop for some site work and I wish she’d regress back to a mouse so that I’m more comfortable operating her computer.

Touchscreen Keyboard

Recently, my old phone died on me and I was forced to upgrade. I had dreaded this day for some time, as I knew it meant losing my pullout keyboard. I think too many errors occur with the touch screen typing system and don’t even get me started on Mrs. Sip’s swiping texts that are littered with spelling errors and unrecognizable words. I often respond to her with a simple “?” because I have no clue what she’s writing me about. And sometimes I do it just to be a dick!

Websites (Instagram, Linked In, Foursquare)

While I’ve joined sites like Facebook, Twitter, and even Pinterest, there are numerous other social media hubs that I just can’t get into. I don’t get the rage over Instagram and the weird filters people use on their low-resolution pics, I don’t care to meet business contacts through Linked In (I mean, my contacts would just be winos and alcoholics anyway), and I don’t need to let everyone know I’m still sitting on my couch through Foursquare!

Cell Phone Photos

Speaking of low-res photos, I really don’t understand why people are relying on their cell phones to capture the greatest moments of their life. I get it that you’ve shelled out a fair amount of money for these devices and that bringing along an actual camera is another hassle to deal with, but you just can’t replace the quality of image a real camera provides. No matter how good cell phone pixel quality gets, it will never supersede the ol’ digital camera.

Ear Buds

Am I the only person in the world who absolutely despises these sound delivery devices? Everywhere I look, people have ear buds jammed into their head. That’s not to say I don’t like listening to music, but I prefer to have an actually set of headphones and not something that constantly feels like it’s going to fall out of the snugness of my earlobe. Perhaps my ears are made to the specifications desired for bud usage, but I hate those little things.

Tablets

I have nothing against tablets and I think they are actually pretty neat with the big screen and all the functions they can provide. That said, between my laptop and phone, I have no intention of ever purchasing one. Donations will be accepted (they always are!) at the Sip Advisor headquarters, however. If anyone is tired of their iPad, Tab, Surface, or Nexus, you know who to ship it to.

E-Reader

I barely read enough print books to justify having eyes and a brain, let alone an e-reader. Mrs. Sip spends countless hours on her digital book, which infuriates me to near madness. No, I don’t see the Sip Advisor picking up a Nook, Kindle, or Kobo anytime soon; unless it becomes the only way for little sippers to read my awesome work… then I’ll practically become the face of the industry!

Video Game Systems

I’ve said it before and I’ll probably have to say it again: I will not buy another video game console. After the Nintendo 64, I held out for years without buying a system until finally caving an buying a Playstation 2 near the dying days of the console. Then I said it again before becoming enamored with the Nintendo Wii, again in its later years of existence. Clearly, I’m not an early adopted and I may own all of these products right before they become useless!

Drink #312: Sweet Tweet

1 oz Rum
0.5 oz Galliano
0.5 oz Peach Liqueur
Splash of Lime Juice
Dash of Cherry Syrup
Garnish with Lime Wheel

Which items do you refuse to purchase and accept as the way things are done today? Am I the only one who refuses to give up the Discman, Sega Genesis, and MySpace!?

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
I “borrowed” this recipe from a photographed menu from the Mandarin Oriental Hotel in New York, which also offers guests the Garden of Google, Brbon Tumblr, and… the SipAdvisor. Hey, wait, hold on a second. Should I be asking for royalties? Perhaps a cease and desist order? I’ll have to contemplate my legal options! As for the cocktail, it wasn’t bad, but it was a little too sweet. I guess that was implied in the drink’s name.

November 5 – International Incident

Posted on November 5, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Drink Nation

I recently stumbled upon a report about the 10 greatest drinking nations in the world. Sadly, Canada did not make that list, but neither did our neighbours to the south… or even their neighbours to the south. Here are my thoughts on those that did crack the top 10 and where I think Canadians need to improve to better our future ranking.

10. Australia

While Australia has wine and beer creations to its credit, I can’t think of any liquors they’ve introduced to the world. The article does point out that former Australian Prime Minister Bob Hawke made the Guinness Book of World Records for downing 2.5 pints of beer in 2.5 seconds. If that’s the effort your politicians are putting forward, I guess you deserve to be on this list.

Wow, even the roos are getting in on the act!

9. Germany

The land of Oktoberfest; the event which has largely earned them this spot on the countdown. Germany is known for their beer making, beer serving (wenches impressively carrying eight beer steins at the same time), and beer consumption. Although the Czech citizens drink more beer than the Germans, that’s still not enough to topple this suds nation.

8. Uganda

How does an African nation make this list? Does professional wrestler Kamala (the Ugandan Giant) have something to do with this, forcing the country’s way onto the list through sheer intimidation tactics? Apparently residents will gather and sit around a pot of ajono (beer-like substance) and pass a long straw around. Not sure that earns their way onto this list.

7. South Korea

All this despite South Korea’s strict social guidelines. Apparently, it’s common practice in the country to get plastered on mixes of beer and whiskey and let loose, getting out all of your pent-up anger and frustration. So, basically what every drinker in the world does when they’re a few wobbly pops deep into the night!

6. Moldova

According to the World Health Organization, Moldova is the most liquored up nation in the world. Stats say that per person, each resident drinks 18 litres of alcohol in a year. Does that include children? The former Soviet nation’s favourite hangover cure is pickle juice and I’m down with that. Perhaps we could share some Moldovian fruit brandies, followed by pickles for breakfast!

5. Ecuador

The local liquor in Ecuador, Zhumir, is affectionately known as “hangover in a bottle”… that’s a challenge the Sip Advisor would like to take, given my invincibility towards the morning after suffering. Etiquette in the country dictates that you cannot start drinking until someone has made a toast, so if you’re all alone, make sure there’s a mirror in your room to cheers yourself.

4. France

Home to the Champagne region and too-many-to-count wineries. Apparently the people of France turn their nose up to selling liquor from other countries. That’s not really surprising, but it means they’re really missing out, especially with Belgian beers, Spanish sangria and English gin offerings so close to their borders.

What does this have to do with drinking? Nothing, but I’m posting it anyway! Suck it, France!

3. Russia

Russians drink vodka at all times of the day. It’s just their way of life. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, bedtime snack… no time of day is enjoyed sans vodka. Russia is the all-important buckle of the Vodka Belt. I’m totally down with people that don’t drink in normal conventions. We’d get along real well.

2. China

Sadly, this site has never received a viewer from the massive country of China. Thanks to the nation’s censorship laws, citizens often have to tether on to other countries internet signals to access non-governmental approved sites. I guess the more citizens you have (and China of course has tons) the more liquor you need to keep the population docile and happy and therefore your portfolio in the alcohol world grows.

1. United Kingdom

While I’ve always had a good time drinking in the U.K., I’m not sure I agree with the country taking the top spot on this list. That said, the country is lined with bars that are often packed to the brim with people looking to get boozed up. They can also be credited with much of the world’s gin production and for that, we thank them. Party on Brits!

Drink #309: International Incident

0.5 oz Irish Crème
0.5 oz Vodka
0.5 oz Amaretto
0.5 oz Coffee Liqueur
0.5 oz Macadamia Nut Liqueur
Splash of Milk
Garnish with Macadamia Nuts

If the fine folks in Mexico can’t even crack the list, despite their IP on tequila production, then us schlubs in Canada shouldn’t feel so bad. I also question nations like Ireland (although I guess it’s kind of part of the U.K.) and Belgium not cracking the top 10. I want answers, dammit!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
This recipe is intended to be a shot, but I increased the ingredient increments and turned it into a nightcap cocktail. The drink gave me my first chance to use our Macadamia Nut Liqueur, which I subbed for the originally scheduled Hazelnut Liqueur and it tasted great. A highlight of the cocktail was the hint of salt you got with each sip, thanks to the Macadamia Nuts garnish!

November 3 – Dragon’s Breath

Posted on November 3, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Mythological Mayhem

I’m not really one for mythological beings, but if forced to pick a few favourites (as I’m being charged to do so here) these are the creatures I would pick:

Dragon

I like some movies based around dragons. How to Train Your Dragon was really good and Pete’s Dragon was a childhood treat. In each of those films, the dragons (Toothless and Elliot, respectively) were of a friendlier, loveable personality. I’m also a fan of the Eddie Murphy-voiced Mushu, but not particularly in the movie Mulan, but for the little dragon’s appearance as co-host of the Disney Animation Building’s ‘How to Draw’ attraction.

Pegasus

The winged horse that I best remember from Disney’s Hercules cartoon, where it helped our hero Herc battle the forces of James Woods (otherwise known as Hades and evil incarnate). Wrestler Chris Benoit was also known as the Pegasus Kid and Wild Pegasus early in his career, as he toured Japan, Mexico, and Europe. Back to the stallion, one myth states that Pegasus was born from the spurting blood of a decapitated Medusa. Those Greeks sure no how to spin a yarn!

Centaur/Minotaur

Sometimes I wish I was half-man and half-beast… well, even more so than when I’m on a raging bender! What’s the difference between a centaur and a minotaur? A centaur has the body of a beast and head of a man, while a minotaur is of the opposite persuasion. While some may think that it’s hard to pick from one of these designations, I’d choose centaur in a heartbeat. That way I could look as gorgeous as I do now and be able to be a high profile athlete thanks to my tremendous lower body strength.

Unicorn

The national animal of Scotland (which still cracks me up to this day), was purported to have magic qualities. It was thought that the unicorn’s horn could be ground up and used in potions to help cure the ill. During medieval and Renaissance times, the horn of the narwhal was often sold to those looking to harness the unicorn’s powers. Nowadays, the horns of rhinoceroses are sold to those looking to increase their sexual virility. To sum up: horn = good.

Griffin

This creature mixes the head and wings of an eagle with the body of a lion. Geez, can you imagine if lions could fly. Good luck keeping them pent up in a zoo, even if they do sleep away most of the day. I like big cats like lions and such because I think they possess a surliness of sorts. Anyway, getting back on track, the griffin combines an animal I love with an animal I detest, so what does one do in cases like that? I guess you just focus on the positives… go Hufflepuff!

Gremlin

While I prefer gremlins when their still in their Mogwai state and they haven’t been fed after midnight, like the uber cute Gizmo, they do serve an entertaining and often hilarious role even when they’ve crossed over to the dark side. Gremlins are often portrayed negatively, which has upset supporters of their society. They’re usually seen tampering with in-flight airplanes and disrupting other machinery. They should not be trusted, should you ever come across one.

Kraken

I like Kraken Black Spice Rum and shouting “Release the Kraken!” when we’re swimming in Ma and Pa Sip’s pool is a favourite pastime of mine, so the Kraken is a must for the list. The Kraken is usually depicted as an enormous sea monster, similar to a giant squid or octopus. It is capable of bringing down an entire ship and has been blamed for numerous tragedies at sea. These false accusations have caused the Kraken to remain hidden, deep beneath the surface and we may never know of its actual existence.

Gargoyle

The Disney cartoon, Gargoyles, is one of those extremely underrated shows that had enjoyable elements for kids and adults alike. Along with the humour of gargoyles adapting to a 20th century New York City (after being awakened from thousands of years trapped in stone) many storylines were dark, complex, and featured adult themes such as betrayal and hatred. Being a self-effacing person, I’ve adopted Moe Szyslak’s line about being a gargoyle, although I’m told I have model cheekbones!

Phoenix

While the first thing I think about when I hear the word Phoenix (aside from the Arizona town, of course) is Jean Grey’s evil character in X-Men (making her so much more interesting that plain old, boring Jean Grey), the Pheonix is another mythological bird that must be vanquished from the world. The only problem is, the Phoenix will continually rise from the ashes of its predecessor and haunt me with loud noises, poop bombs, and dive-bomb attacks.

Werewolf

There’s a great episode (aren’t they all!) of American Dad where Steve thinks he’s been turned into a werewolf, while at the same time, Roger has taken in a wolf to overcome his distress after the death of his two sea monkeys. Don’t just take it from me, go watch the episode. I’ve never really been a huge fan of werewolves and the whole Twilight franchise did nothing to help with that matter. Team “Who Gives a Fuck” was a more accurate take on the series.

Drink #307: Dragon’s Breath

Rim glass with Caesar Spice
1.5 oz Dragonberry Rum
Top with Cranberry Juice
Splash of Lime Juice
Dash of Hot Sauce
Garnish with a Lime Wheel

What are your favourite mythological animals? And please don’t send me any replies citing Pokemon or anything else having to do with Japanese culture like Godzilla and Mothra. Seriously, those people come up with the craziest stuff!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I added just the right amount of Hot Sauce to this cocktail. It wasn’t so much that the drink was hard to enjoy and it wasn’t too little that you didn’t get a slight burn at the finish of each sip. I added a Caesar Spice Rim to give each sip that extra kick of heat!

November 1 – Day of the Dead Cocktail

Posted on November 1, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Burial Blitz

Halloween may be over, but we still have the Day of the Dead to celebrate. What better way to do so than look at interesting burial rituals from around the world! Here are some of the most bizarre:

Dining In (Papua New Guinea/Brazil)

Practiced by the Melanesians and Wari peoples, the ‘Feast of the Dead’ was used to bolster a lasting relationship between a recently deceased person and their loved ones. With the ingestion of the body, that dead person was also making one last sacrifice for the tribe, helping them get over their grief. Along these lines, the Yanomami will cremate a body first before consuming the ashes with a banana paste. Mmmm, that’s good eating!

Soul Searching (Tibet)

The Buddhist believe that the body is just a capsule for the soul to live. Therefore, when a person dies, the body no longer has any worth and is dismembered and left to be eaten by scavengers. Ground burial isn’t really a possibility in the frigid mountains of the region and so this is apparently the best way to deal with the deceased. Just think of all the condos that could be built if we no longer needed space for cemeteries.

Totem Poled (Pacific Northwest)

The Haida would take the bodies of their most respected citizens and crush it with clubs, making it fit into a box similar in size to a suitcase. It would then be placed upon a totem pole, which was to protect the individual and guide them into afterlife. Apparently this left quite the stench, though, as described by original missionaries to the areas. Bears must have also been a problem, as they searched for that ever-elusive picnic basket!

Hard Knock Life (Northern Europe)

The slave girl of a dead high-ranking Viking would be forced to have sex with every man in the village before being strangled to death and stabbed by a village matriarch. She would then be placed aboard a ship, with her master’s body and the ship would be lit on fire. This was all done to make sure the slave would serve her master in the afterlife and the Viking’s life force would be released through the mass sex (known today as rape).

Apparently you all aren’t good with grieving either!

Cliff Dive (China)

The Bo people buried their dead in caskets on platforms that jut out from the side of cliffs in southwest China’s Gongxian County. Why they did this is a mystery, as the civilization was largely wiped out by the Ming Dynasty centuries ago. Today, they are referred to as the “Sons of the Cliff” or “Subjugators of the Sky”. The cliffs also feature murals showing examples of how the Bo lived, similar to the Egyptians hieroglyphics.

Light My Fire (Bali)

This mass burning of bodies is at least followed by a feast of epic proportions, so at least you always have that to look forward to. The Hindu population of the island bury village members as they pass away in a mass grave. When there are enough bodies (I’m not sure of how many constitutes “enough”) the bodies are unearthed and placed on a float, which is showcased around the village (this ain’t no Disney parade), before being lit on fire in the hub of the settlement.

Immolation Sensation (India)

Today, we comfort a widow in the event their partner dies, but back in the day, it was a whole different story, particularly for women. In India, women were subjected to burn themselves to death during the funeral of their husband, in an act known as Sati. Of course, not all participants were willing. Some believe that the Sati was started to make sure wives wouldn’t poison or otherwise dispose of their husband to marry a lover. I hope Mrs. Sip keeps this in mind!

Drink #305: Day of the Dead Cocktail

1.5 oz Tequila (I used 1800 Reposado)
0.75 oz Grand Marnier
Splash of Orange Juice
Dash of Cinnamon
Garnish with Cinnamon-Dusted Orange Slice

Of course, there are many other burial traditions out there, but I found these to be the most interesting. Can you imagine having to take part in any of these? What burial techniques fascinate you? Until next time…

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
This cocktail wasn’t that bad. I like how the Cinnamon dusting kicked in at the end of each sip and added some spice and flavour to the drink. The Grand Marnier was my favourite component of the recipe and I feel the orange-flavoured liqueur works quite well with Tequila.

October 30 – Corpse Reviver

Posted on October 30, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Clever Costumes

There are some really funny costumes out there. Somehow, I’ve narrowed a limitless number of hilarious coverings down to a few favourites. There folks should be so proud of the honour I’m about to bestow upon them!

Just think about all the action this guy would get in a night, as every girl at the party would want to be the one featured in the Facebook post. Of course, he’d have to hold that sign up most of the time, but the benefits totally outweigh the effort. This is the kind of selfie I can get behind.

Mrs. Sip loves lobster… but maybe not this much! When this kid is old enough to realize what happened to them at such a young age, do you think they’ll want justice. Perhaps they’ll be in therapy thanks to flashbacks of being stuffed in a pot and nightmares of being cooked. Good parenting!

You would have to imagine that these two boys don’t even know what Breaking Bad is, but kudos to them for going along with a costume that is clearly the brainchild of their parents. Both boys nail the look of Jesse and Walter and you hope people handing out candy would appreciate the effort.

Poor puppy doesn’t know that its owners and everyone it walks by is having a laugh at its expense. The payback will come when the dog chews up its owner stuff, slobbers throughout the house and perhaps even leaves a few ‘presents’ for its people to have to clean up. Sweet revenge!

The problem with this costume is that it doesn’t work so well when any member separates from the group. Therefore, you have to choose the group members wisely because you’ll probably be spending the entire night with them or in a nearby proximity to them.

Drink #303: Corpse Reviver

1 oz Cognac (I used Courvoisier)
0.5 oz Apple Rum
0.5 oz Sweet Vermouth
Garnish with Body Part Gummies

If you think there are better costumes out there, let me know. I’m always looking for my next Halloween outfit and have no qualms about ripping someone else off!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2.5 Sips out of 5):
There is also the more popular Corpse Reviver #2 recipe, but I wanted to give the original some air time. Today’s recipe calls for Apple Brandy, but not having any on hand, I resorted to an Apple Rum, which provided some of the required flavour, but lacked the sweetness the Brandy might have offered. That was left for the Sweet Vermouth to provide and it did so to a reasonable degree.

October 28 – Witch’s Brew

Posted on October 28, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Happy Hunting

Drawing from my years of experience as a world renowned candy hunter, I’ve come up with some great tips for all the little sippers out there that are looking forward to a wicked Halloween haul. Some of these tricks and tip may not be of the highest moral value, but they’ll fill your pillowcases quicker than a pillow (just made that up… probably needs a little tinkering)!

Tip #1: Candy Clusters

The best way to maximize your Trick or Treat time is to find areas where there are numerous doors to knock on in a tight space. Apartment and town house complexes or even neighbourhoods where houses don’t have much yard space between lots are perfect to rack up the goodies without tuckering yourself out too much.

Tip #2: Return Trips

If a house is giving out something really awesome (full-sized bars, bags with multiple candies, etc.), there is nothing wrong with returning to that residence later in the evening. Don’t pester the poor people with repeated visits, but perhaps hit the place again on a second go-round of the neighbourhood.

Tip #3: No Pack Mentality

While you want to be with your friends and share this wonderful experience, don’t get bogged down by being in too big of a group. Let’s be honest, only a few of the people you’re usually with are actually your friends. Stick to smaller groups which makes it easier to travel and get your treat at each house before moving onto the next stop.

Tip #4: Courtesy Counts

Be very thankful and energetic at each stop. You never know if your costume, behaviour or other intangible might earn you a bonus piece of candy. Also, if you drop by the home of someone you know, make sure to acknowledge them, as your relationship to them or their kin may benefit your treat haul.

Tip #5: Split Shift

It won’t be too long before you’re running out of room in your bag and are tired of lugging the heavy sack around. There’s no shame in planning a route that lets you stop off at home, dump out your candy, and hit the road again for round two. Or, if with friends, make sure one of your homes is along the route for a recharging point.

Tip #6: Home Collection

Each time you go in and out of your own house, make sure to grab a treat for yourself (and one for your imaginary friend!), courtesy of your own parents. The leftover will largely be yours anyway, so you’re just getting ahead of the game.

Tip #7: Longevity Wins

Make sure you’re up for a full night of candy hunting. At the end of the evening, some folks might be giving out more than the usual one piece in order to get through their stock and be able to shut their lights off. This is when you pounce and take advantage of the fact that you have better cardio and durability than all the others. Your training has paid off!

Drink #301: Witch’s Brew

1.5 oz Raspberry Vodka (I used Absolut)
Top with half Tonic Water and half Cranberry Juice
Splash of Blue Raspberry Mixer
Garnish with Berries

Anyone else out there have any suggestions for the wee little sippers who will be hitting the streets in just a few days’ time? Feel free to pass them along.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I was pleasantly surprised by this cocktail. While I’m not a big Tonic Water fan, it didn’t detract from this drink, perhaps because I covered it with the Berry garnishes and the Blue Raspberry Mixer. This is one case where I wish I had access to liquid nitrogen to create a fog effect.

October 24 – Nerds

Posted on October 24, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Terrible Treats

There’s not a lot of candy out there that isn’t good, but some items draw some serious ire for the Sip Advisor. Here’s what tops the unwanted list:

Black Jelly Beans/Jube Jubes

I’ve grown to accept both of these evil devices, as my tastes have expanded, but there’s a reason why in a bowl of jelly beans or jube jubes, the black ones are the last to be finished, often with a clump of them remaining and some brave soul being dared to rid them from the world. And no, I’m not a racist, except towards those damn purple people, but that’s another story for another day.

Jelly Bellies

You just never know what you’re going to get with the mixed jelly bean flavours and that mystery can really stress a fella out. BeanBoozled packs even capitalize on this confusion with identically coloured candies on opposite ends of the taste spectrum. Some doppelgangers include Coconut or Baby Wipes, Tutti-Fruitti or Stinky Sock, Caramel Corn or Moldy Cheese, and Juicy Pear or Booger. I do have to give the company credit for their Cocktail Classics line, featuring Mojito, Bellini, Margarita, Pina Colada, Cosmo, and Daiquiri flavours!

Jawbreakers

The favourite candy of dentists everywhere! I’m always worried when eating a jawbreaker that I’m going to wreck my teeth. I’m just not patient enough to let the hard candy become soft, which is probably why I enjoy chewy Gobstoppers for their light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel ability. I remember having one of those massive giant jawbreakers when I was really young and having to smash it on the floor to make a piece small enough to fit in my mouth… then it was basically a choking hazard. Ah, the wonders of childhood!

Peeps

I’ve never really been a huge fan of marshmallow based candies and cookies. Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’d rather have a cream filling! Are you done giggling? How about now? Seriously, I’m just not that into marshmallows. Perhaps roasting them over the fire and exacting revenge on them via flames is the closest I can say I come to enjoying marshmallows. I do make concessions for marshmallows as part of baking, such as Rice Krispy Squares or Ma Sip’s famous delicacies.

Push Pops

The thing I hated about these candies is that your spit would end up all over your finger and hand as it came through the device holding it. I thought we were supposed to teach kids not to suck on their fingers and grow the eff up! There seems to be some sort of disconnect between the two ideas there. Similarly horrible were Ring Pops, although I do look fabulous in designer candy jewelry!

Milk Duds

Junior Caramels are much better, but when Mrs. Sip can’t locate any for her movie popcorn, she’ll grab Milk Duds, which can be very hard to chew and you normally end up choking on the piece as you try to swallow. We’ve also taken a shine recently to the Caramilk or Rolo bites that were released not that long ago. Basically, as long as the chocolate and caramel is soft, we’re pretty happy. Once Mrs. Sip dumps them into her popcorn, though, I no longer partake.

Drink #297: Nerds

1 oz Melon Liqueur
1 oz Blue Curacao
Top with Lemonade
Garnish with Nerds

Which candies do you deplore? We should have a candy burning festival and as all the awful items burn in hell, we should rejoice in the purity of our favourite treats and stuff ourselves full of glorious vices!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2.5 Sips out of 5):
I certainly wouldn`t associate Nerds or this cocktail with the ‘Terrible Treats’ moniker. I tried to put the Nerds on the rim of the glass, but they were too heavy to stay in place. To compensate, I just poured them on top of the cocktail and I think that worked well enough. The drink didn’t blow my mind and left me a little disappointed. Not to mention that I think all these candy drinks are slowly giving me diabetes!

October 23 – Skittles

Posted on October 23, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

It’s Good to be Bad

There are some horrific villains out there in movie land; characters that keep fans thirsting for sequel after sequel. Here are some of the best in the business!

Freddy Krueger – A Nightmare on Elm Street

I have to admit that after I watched the original A Nightmare on Elm Street for the very first time as a little sipper, I didn’t want to go to sleep that night. The thought of a monster like Freddy Krueger being able to attack a person in their dreams was a novel idea. With his signature bladed claw, I’d love to see a showdown between Freddy and Wolverine from X-Men. Both are virtually invincible and rely on slashing weapons. It would be one hell of a bloody battle.

Leatherface – The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

With a mask made of human skin, a bloody butcher’s smock, and an ear-shattering chainsaw in his hand, Leatherface is certainly one of the most imposing baddies in film history. The Leatherface character and costume was adopted by professional wrestling, mostly in Japan. I have seen Leatherface the wrestler live and it’s quite the sight to see a big hulking guy chase audience members around with a revving chainsaw (no blade, of course).

Jigsaw – Saw

I enjoy playing games, but I don’t think I’d ever want to cozy up to Jigsaw with a Monopoly board or Yahtzee Dice. I’d probably end up in one of his horrific traps, being challenged to justify my wasted existence as the Sip Advisor (I don’t think it’s a wasted existence, but John Kramer – the man behind Jigsaw – would probably think so). Billy, the creepy doll Jigsaw uses to deliver messages to his victims is as deranged and disturbing as dolls come. He would not fit in with The Muppets.

Ghostface – Scream

Although Ghostface has been parodied in the Scary Movie franchise, it’s still a pretty haunting character when you go back and watch any of the Scream films. The franchise has been brilliant with its story of a town of teens being terrorized by a spook that kills silently, but taunts its victims with phone calls prior to their death. The design of the mask is based on the famous painting ‘The Scream’ by Edvard Munch and was a legit Halloween costume before the films were made.

Hannibal Lecter – Silence of the Lambs

More of a cerebral monster here, but Hannibal Lecter also has a vicious side. Anthony Hopkins is synonymous with the character, his portrayal winning the star a Best Actor Oscar in 1991, but did you know Lecter was played by someone before Hopkins? Brian Cox played Lecter (or Lektor as the character’s name was changed to for copyright reasons) in the 1986 film Manhunter. John Lithgow also auditioned for that role and given his work as a serial killer on Dexter, he would have been great here, as well.

Pennywise – It

I’m not much of a fan of clowns to begin with, but after watching the It TV mini-movie, I’ll never look at those folks the same again. Pennywise, in clown form, has to be one of the most disturbing villains Stephen King has ever dreamed up… even without the sharp teeth and claws. I have to say that the TV mini-movie is really good for the first half, but totally falls apart in the latter half. Watch with caution or wait for the rumoured re-adaptation to finally come to fruition.

Michael Myers – Halloween

Committed to an asylum as a youngster after murdering his older sister, Michael Myers escapes and wreaks havoc on the Halloween season, tormenting his victims and racking up kills. Myers emotionless face is a frightening image to behold and would certainly stimulate nightmares. Perhaps even more scary is the fact Myers has lived through so many sequels that he seems unstoppable. Happy endings be damned!

Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13^th

Hockey can be violet enough, but when you put a mask on a killer seeking revenge and arm him with a machete, you’re certainly asking for trouble. Thanks to staff negligence, Jason Voorhees drowned as a boy at Camp Crystal Lake and returns to the site of his tragic end to mass murder camp counselors and others engaging in immoral behaviour. I won’t spoil the ending of the original movie, but Jason isn’t even the killer until the second film in the franchise.

Drink #296: Skittles

1 oz Kinky Liqueur
0.5 oz Vodka
0.5 oz Blue Curacao
Top with half Orange Juice and half Lemonade
Garnish with Skittles

Who’s your favourite horror movie baddie? Have I grossly neglected a villain on this list? I guess they’ll be hunting me down now!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
I always have a desire to “taste the rainbow” and while this cocktail was good to start with and looked fantastic, its score was bumped up even higher when the Skittles garnishes melted a little bit in the drink and gave it an extra boost of candy flavour. It was also fun to eat the little treats as you drank your way through the recipe.

Sip Advisor

The Good, The Bad & The Bubbly

Category Archives: Crazy & Classic Cocktails