September 20 – Blue Hawaiian

Posted on September 20, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Mahalo

Mrs. Sip and I, along with members of the Sip Alliance are off to Hawaii in a couple days to celebrate my ‘Dirty 30’! I figured it would be a good time to look into things to do on the islands (I will focus on Oahu and the city of Honolulu, as that’s where we’re staying) and while the list could basically say “do absolutely nothing,” there are actually a few must-see and must-do attractions to be enjoyed!

Hike Diamond Head

While I’m vehemently opposed to any exercise while on vacation, the sights from atop Diamond Head are said to be spectacular, giving those brave enough to traverse the volcanic cone a view of the entire island paradise. I only wish it was like the 1975 game show The Diamond Head Game, where contestants stepped into a ‘money volcano’ and tried to grab flying cash!

Buy Something at the Aloha Stadium Market

When Mrs. Sip and I hit the market during our last visit, I grabbed a Hawaii 5-0 t-shirt that said “Book’em Danno” (my dad’s nickname for me when I was a wee little sipper), while Mrs. Sip grabbed a bottle of balsamic vinegar. There are so many other great items up for grabs here, but it doesn’t take too long before you tire of the search. Make sure to keep hydrated in the heat.

Pay Your Respects at Pearl Harbor and the USS Arizona Memorial

The Ben Affleck flick just doesn’t do the story justice… in fact, it probably detracts from the history. The site was home to Japan’s attack on the United States on Dec. 7, 1941, pulling the country into World War II. Make sure to grab your ticket for the attraction early in the day, as the limited vouchers are sold before the morning turns into afternoon.

Learn at the Polynesian Cultural Center

Eight different villages are honoured at the Cultural Centre, including Tonga, Samoa, New Zealand, Fiji, Tahiti, and others. Here, you can get a henna tattoo, learn how to hula dance, participate in tribal games, or even sample the utterly disgusting poi. A true highlight is the Royal Feast, which will leave you completely stuffed, as you enjoy Polynesian dancing and other performing arts.

Do an Island Pub Crawl

In researching this article, I found out there is a Dave & Buster’s in Honolulu, so that is definitely going on the list. Sadly, though, Senor Frog’s closed down this year due to a rent disagreement. When Mrs. Sip and I were on the island in 2009, we travelled around and found some amazing spots and drink deals. Pitchers of beer for $5 and $2 Mai Tais… this isn’t brain science!

Eat, Eat, Eat

There are numerous locations you have to visit in Hawaii for their culinary delectables. From American cuisine favourites at The Cheesecake Factory to romantic seafood meals at Duke’s and everything in between, there’s something for every taste on the island. Mrs. Sip and I found this hidden Mexican joint the last time we were there and hopefully we can track it down again!

Get Wet at Waikiki Beach

Whether you want to try your hand at surfing or snorkeling, play among the waves that crash against the shore, or just hang out on the sand and perfect your tan, hitting the beach offers all this and more. I like to grab a spot close enough to the bars on the other side of the street so that you’re primed for when hunger, thirst, or happy hour strikes.

Appreciate Wildlife at the Honolulu Zoo or Waikiki Aquarium

Perfect for kids and adults who still want to be young, both the zoo and aquarium are home to a number of amazing animal species. The zoo houses 1,230 animals that will keep you enthralled with their behaviour, while the aquarium is located right along the beach, the optimal setting for viewing creatures of the water. Must-see attractions for all ages.

Drink #263: Blue Hawaiian

0.75 oz Light Rum (I used Bacardi)
0.75 oz Vodka
0.5 oz Blue Curacao
Top with Pineapple Juice
Splash of Sweet & Sour Mix
Garnish with Lemon and Lime Slices

Do you have any suggestions for our upcoming trip and birthday celebration? We’ll try to squeeze it in among all the drinking and relaxing!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2.5 Sips out of 5):
There are other Blue Hawaii and Blue Hawaiian recipes, but I went with the traditional offering. It was a strong drink and needed a little dilution to taste decent. Perhaps using a Pineapple or Lemon-Lime Soda in the future would give it a little more zip.

September 19 – Daiquiri

Posted on September 19, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Rum-stravaganza

There are a lot of rum memes out there and I’ve narrowed it down to the best of the lot. Once again, I do it for all you little sippers… free of charge!

As I’ve written before, I often get an odd look when I’m pouring myself a drink in the early hours of the day. I personally see nothing wrong with a nip in the morning. Call it the breakfast of champions, if you will. At least now I know I’m not alone and I properly belong as an audio-animatronic on Pirates of the Caribbean!

I’ve always felt akin to felines and now I know we share the same feelings on rum and the fear of discovering it’s all gone. Luckily, I always keep a thorough stock of the spirit, usually in a variety of styles and flavours. Relax little kitty, you’re always welcome to come party with the Sip Advisor!

I hate running… but if I saw a group of people running with the thoughts that we were all chasing down some sweet liquor, I’d be right at the head of the group and doing everything I could, Wacky Races style, to finish first. Like this meme, though, the minute I learned everyone was just going for a jog, I’d quietly disappear!

Now this is my kind of exercise. Bringing your glass routinely to your lips is a form of bicep curls and if you’re constantly getting up and down to make a new beverage, that could be looked at as doing squats. Finally, drinking while also not dying can be thought of as breathing exercises, and now you’re getting a full body workout!

We can learn a lot from our elders, particularly this wise meme lady. I need to do a better job of having contingency liquor. Right now, I have everything in one basic spot and that’s not planning ahead properly. Most importantly, everyone should have one bottle stashed in their bedroom in case they don’t feel like getting out of bed!

Drink #262: Daiquiri

1.5 oz Light Rum (I used Bacardi)
Splash of Lime Juice
Dash of Simple Syrup
Garnish with a Lime Wheel

Today we drink the daiquiri, one of the world’s most noble cocktails. Join me, won’t you!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
Last month, I included the Wildberry Daiquiri as part of Frozen Cocktail Week, but it’s such a classic cocktail, it had to be done for Rum Week, as well. This version isn’t too bad, but there’s not a whole lot going on and the Light Rum taste isn’t masked as well as most might hope for. I like my drinks to play on the strong side, so that’s okay with me, but other’s might want to hesitate.

September 18 – Mai-Tai

Posted on September 18, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Rum Diary

There are some pretty good rum slogans out there, as companies try to capitalize on the liquor’s perception as a laid back spirit. Here are some of my favourites, as we sail through the Caribbean!:

Sailor Jerry’s – This is no girly rum.

One of my favourite libations of all time and a brand that could be the first inductee into my own personal liquor hall of fame (oh, that sounds like a good article idea!), I love Sailor Jerry’s. And yes, it is certainly not a girly rum… even though there’s a picture of a girl prominently on the bottle. I’ve probably gone through more bottles of Sailor Jerry’s than any other alcohol and that’s something to be proud of!

Malibu – Malibu… seriously easy going.

With the company’s blend of light rum and fruit flavours, one could definitely conclude that Malibu is “seriously easy going”! Is there anything finer in life than relaxing on a sandy beach, the sun bronzing your skin, with a rum-based cocktail in your hand? The all-inclusive industry was based on this theory and now those companies thrive in having people get their R&R on, accompanied by the divine secrets of sweet lady liquor.

Appleton – Raise your rum!

And toast the liquor gods, while you’re at it. This slogan is two-fold. On one hand, they’re talking about raising the quality of the rum you drink when you choose Appleton. On the other hand, it can be viewed as a toast and celebration thanks to the fine folks at Appleton. I’m a big fan of Appleton, something I know I’m not alone on. So, raise your rum to the Sip Advisor and let’s get bombed!

Bacardi – Live like you mean it.

I grew up on Bacardi, as it was my parent’s rum of choice and as a result, I’ll always have a place in my heart for the spirit. I like to think I live most days to the fullest and Bacardi has often helped me with that quest. The Sip Advisor becomes a whole different being when the rum is flowing and good times are set to be had. Every day should be cherished in some way and Bacardi is always a good start!

Captain Morgan – Got a little Captain in you?

I certainly have a little Captain in me… just not in that way… not that there’s anything wrong with that! I have a sense of adventure and of boozing my way through those glorious good times. Pirating is surely in my blood, somewhere along the family lines because I love rum, the water, being aboard ships, and causing mayhem. For those of you that don’t like those things, you can apply to my school of rehabilitation and we’ll get that all sorted out.

Parrot Bay – The Parrot is calling.

If the Parrot is calling, I’m certainly listening! And that’s even though I absolutely hate birds. At least the parrot is a colourful species, which helps you ignore all the other annoying bird elements for a short time. Then, once you get to the rum drinking, you completely put aside all of your hatred towards the aviary animals. We can all get along thanks to a little shared enjoyment of the finer things in life.

Drink #261: Mai-Tai

0.75 oz Dark Rum (I used Captain Morgan)
0.75 oz Light Rum
0.5 oz Amaretto
0.5 oz Triple Sec
Top with half Orange Juice and half Pineapple Juice
Float Grenadine
Garnish with a Maraschino Cherry and Cocktail Umbrella

Which rum slogans are you particularly fond of? Has the Sip Advisor slipped up and left your favourite line off this list. Come on, give me hell!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
While I wasn’t able to pull of the traditional Mai-Tai recipe (not having access to Orgeat Syrup), Mrs. Sip and I found an adapted recipe that subs Amaretto in its place. The drink was good, surprising Mrs. Sip who has a dislike for Amaretto and a love for Mai-Tais. If it passes her taste test, it can’t be written off!

September 17 – Bushwacker

Posted on September 17, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Blendz

Rum has greatly benefitted from the explosion of flavoured spirits, with perhaps vodka being the only alcohol that has enjoyed the expansion more. There are certainly some interesting rum-based selections out there. Here are some worth looking out for:

Cajun-Spiced Rum

Mrs. Sip picked this up for me while she was recently in New Orleans and today’s drink has inspired me to finally crack the bottle open and give it a shot. The Cajun Spiced Rum hails from the Old New Orleans Rum Distillery, which Mrs. Sip got to enjoy a tour of. We’ve all heard of spiced rums, but Cajun-spiced? Well, that’s a whole different story. If the spices do for my drink what they do for chicken, seafood, and other eats, then I think we’re in for some fun!

Captain Morgan: Tattoo/Bite

The Tattoo blend of blackberries, jalapenos, and black pepper is delicious and gets my endorsement for a cheaper but delicious rum. There are mixed reviews, but Mrs. Sip and I grabbed a bottle for our room in Las Vegas recently and made short work of the liquor. As for Bite, Ma and Pa Sip brought this back from one of their travels and put it out for a party shortly thereafter. It didn’t last very long once folks got a taste of the lime-infused spirit.

Bacardi Dragon Berry Rum

Recently, I picked up a bottle of Bacardi Torched Cherry Rum, which was quite delicious with its chocolate overtone. As a bonus, attached to the bottle was a sample size of Bacardi Dragonberry Rum (soon to be presented on The Sip Advisor). I can’t wait to try this spirit, which is said to be a mix of strawberry and dragon berry fruit. I’ll keep you little sippers updated!

Malibu Fresh/Red

I’m looking forward to trying both of these Malibu offerings. Fresh combines coconut rum with mint and I think this would be perfect for mojitos, while Red adds tequila to the coconut rum the company is best known for. I like how Malibu is working hard to try different flavours and I hope they continue to pursue this route in the future.

Ron Miel Honey Rum

As a fan of honey whiskey, I can only assume that honey rum would also fare well with my palate. That lingering sweetness that honey-flavoured alcohols offer is the perfect finish to a cocktail sip and works nicely to dull the sometimes harsher tones of the liquor (whiskey or rum) itself. The added essence also makes them fun to play with in the mixology world.

Whistling Andy Hibiscus-Coconut Rum

I’m not entirely sure who Whistling Andy is, but I like his gamble of putting hibiscus and coconut together. Mrs. Sip brought back with her some hibiscus leaves from Egypt a number of years back, which we used to make juice. Now I’m thinking we should use what’s still left of the shrubbery to blend our own infused rums! Things are about to get messy!

Anyone else notice the perfectly placed bikini butt in the background!

Redrum

This brand infuses the liquor with mango, pineapple, coconut, and berries, which must hit the tongue from a number of different directions. I’m very curious as to how it all comes together, so if anyone wants to send me a bottle for a through taste analysis, you know where to find me. Seriously, just because it’s murder spelled backwards doesn’t scare this hombre.

Sweet Georgia Belle

This product offers an interesting blend of peach and mango, as part of a rum liqueur. Perhaps it is meant to mimic the taste of a debutant, but that sounds like the company would be bordering on some serious legal implications. Let’s just assume they got wild and crazy and threw the two fruits together hoping for the best. I hope for that, too!

Drink #260: Bushwacker

1 oz Rum (I used Cajun Spiced)
0.75 oz Kahlua
0.75 oz Crème de Cacao
Top with half Coconut Cream and half Milk
Garnish with Coconut Shavings and Chocolate Sprinkles

What rum blends out there have you tried and thoroughly enjoyed or have come across and want to try, willing to give up your first born child to taste the beautiful elixir? Don’t worry, you’re far from alone!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
The Cajun Spiced Rum is quite tasty with a slight twist on the usual spiced rum concept. Between all the ingredients, you get hints of chocolate, coconut, coffee and spiced rum, all combining to make a very nice drink.

September 16 – Bahama Mama

Posted on September 16, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Rum Jams

Music and rum seem to be a match made in heaven. There are so many rum songs out there, particularly from Caribbean nations. Here are some good tracks I was able to dig up:

Rum and Coca-Cola – The Andrews Sisters

I love this tune. It will be played repeatedly when I’m on a rum bender… and that happens with awesome regularity. I’m shocked I had never heard this song before. With Ma and Pa’s passion for rum and cokes, combined with their love for tropical settings and everything that goes along with it, I don’t know why it’s never been played in their backyard on any of our glorious swimming days or at any of their family parties. Perhaps I have now been able to pass something along to them for future celebrations.

Dead Man’s Chest – Various

The rum playlist goes two for two with this pirate shanty. Playing this song will have you and your mates swinging your arms and your mugs of libations around and having a great time of it all. You might even start some swashbuckling adventures thanks to the theme. Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum! This song originally comes from the book Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson and has been featured in the Pirates of the Caribbean movie franchise. Yar!

Bundaberg Rum – Bill Scott

Bundaberg Rum has a reputation of being consumed by loud and troublemaking folk. You know, the kinds of jerks at the bar you don’t want to be around. In Australia, they’re referred to as yobbos, which is a great term. Four bars in Brisbane banned the rum in 2005 because of the disruptive nature it caused for some. Apparently, this is exactly what the Bundaberg company wanted, as its ads were geared towards the yobbos. As for the song, it’s alright, but not as good as the other two.

Little Drummer Boy – Various

Rum pum pum pum… I guess this doesn’t really belong. Let’s get drunk!

Drink #259: Bahama Mama

1 oz Dark Rum (I used Captain Morgan)
0.25 oz Coconut Rum
0.25 oz Kahlua
Top with Pineapple Juice
Splash of Lemon Juice
Garnish with a Maraschino Cherry and Cocktail Umbrella

What’s your favourite rum anthem? Make sure it’s loaded up the next time you crack a bottle of Bundaberg Rum and go on a rampage!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I really enjoyed this drink, despite its use of many ingredients I find to be hit or miss. This time, items like Pineapple and Lemon Juice were indeed hits. There are other Bahama Mama recipes out there, but I completely recommend the one I settled on.

September 15 – Cuba Libre

Posted on September 15, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Rum Runners

Today marks the start of Rum Week here at The Sip and by now, you surely know what that means… a small dose of rum education! So, put your thinking caps on (come on, I ask this of you so seldom), sharpen those pencils, and prepare to have your brains stuffed with useless knowledge. Only the best for my little sippers!

Caribbean: Putting The Punch In Rum

Drink #258: Cuba Libre

1.5 oz Gold Rum (I used Bacardi)
Top with Cola
Garnish with Lime Wedges

I love these infographics. They make my job so much easier. And don’t you think I deserve the odd day off, allowing me to kick back with a few Cuba Libres? You’re right, I’ve earned every bit of vacation time I have!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I used the original Cuba Libre recipe for today’s offering and, of course, it was delicious. I like to try all kinds of different Rums, looking for the right combo with Cola. I prefer Spiced Rums, but Gold Rum gets the job done in a pinch. Anytime you have a plain Rum and Coke, there must be an element of Lime added to the mix. Whether that be some fresh-squeezed Lime Juice, or at the very least, Lime Wedges as part of the recipe… that will combat the scurvy!

September 13 – Drunk Monkey

Posted on September 13, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Shows for the Sloshed

Let me set the picture: you’ve returned to your humble abode after a night out on the town and you’re looking for some viewing entertainment to go along with your nightcap. What do you choose to watch? Here’s what the Sip Advisor has on deck to satiate the inebriated mind!

Mr. T’s World’s Craziest Fools

This show hits on everything I want while under the influence: people doing stupid stuff and getting hurt (one of my favourite things to see in the history of the world), good writing that will leave you laughing your ass off, and lines delivered by the esteemed Mr. T. While the whole genre of amateur footage is one I’ve always appreciated, there’s just something about Mr. T ripping into all these “foos” that is so refreshing.

Tosh.0

In a similar vein to Mr. T’s show, comedian Daniel Tosh lampoons everything going on the wild, wild web, from YouTube videos to internet celebrities and everything in between. Tosh also gets his audience involved in the program with interactive jokes through Twitter, Skype and other social media enterprises. Tosh will not hesitate to rip any subject to shreds, or even reenact it himself, and fans love him for it.

Man vs. Food

Host Adam Richman is a total delight, as he tours the United States, trying food challenges and showcasing restaurants famous for their amazing meals. The one caveat with watching a show like this while drunk is that you have to have some great foods to feast on or else you’ll just get jealous and moody. Before you know it, you’ll be staggering your way to a local eatery in search of pulled pork and poutine and you won’t rest until your shirt is stained with gravy and barbecue sauce!

Aqua Teen Hunger Force

When you’ve downed a bunch of drinks, your attention span may be depleted. That’s what makes these 15-minute episodes (only about 10 minutes if the commercials are cut) so attractive. The characters (I guess that’s what you’d call an anthropomorphized hamburger meat, soft drink cup, and fry carton) are quickly loveable and the jokes are funny. The episodes can be a little crazy with pace, but it’s worth the ride time and again.

Wilfred

I’ve only just started watching this series, but I have no doubt that it will provide drunken evening entertainment for some time to come. The humour is raunchy and a little dark and there’s just something about a dude dressed in a dog suit smoking from a bong, drinking beer, and humping attractive women that I find so endearing. Australian Jason Gann plays Wilfred, who’s as naughty as a puppy can come!

Archer

Sterling Archer is a top-notch secret agent, despite his battles with alcohol and being a total ass. When Mrs. Sip and I got into this series, we watched all four seasons in the span of a few weeks, myself being plastered most nights (making wicked awesome drinks for all you little sippers) and Mrs. Sip joining me on many occasions. You start watching the show for Archer himself, but soon find yourself appreciating each character for what they bring to the show.

South Park

What could be better than a group of potty-mouthed youngsters taking shots at everything and anything? Nothing is off limits to creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone. I’d have to give Eric Cartman the nod as my favourite character, preferring to see him when he’s trying to start a new business venture to capitalize on some current trend, but I also enjoy a number of the secondary characters, with Randy Marsh topping that list.

Drink #256: Drunk Monkey

1 oz Banana Liqueur (I used Bols)
1 oz Melon Liqueur
1 oz Triple Sec
Top with half Cranberry Juice and half Pineapple Juice
Garnish with a Banana Slice

This list also works for people that are high. Really, any show is pretty good when you’re feeling a little fuzzy. I like to learn – or try to learn – when I’m tanked and will watch anything on the Discovery Channel or other educational networks… provided there isn’t a better adult cartoon on at the same time!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I took my photos before mixing the drink because the layering looked cool. All the ingredients shine at some point during each taste, but Mrs. Sip affectionately called it ‘banana in a cup’! There is also a Drunk Monkey Shooter I’d like to try that mixes Banana Liqueur with Sambuca, which will surely be an interesting blend.

September 12 – Furry Purple Squirrel

Posted on September 12, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Mascot Mess

Teams largely have mascots to engage young fans and as a merchandising opportunity. I don’t know why college teams have mascots, as well, but I guess alcohol and people dressed as animals is always a winning combination. Each major league (NHL, MLB, NBA, NFL) is guilty of poorly chosen characters. Here are some of the worst mascots in the wide world of sports:

Carlton the Bear – Toronto Maple Leafs (NHL)

How in the hell is a bear the mascot for this team? Did they just want to be able to sell oodles of merchandise using a cute teddy bear? The team’s mascot should really be a dude dressed up in a leaf costume and they could do this performance introduction, where the leaf blows through the sky and lands flat on the ground, only to be crushed by passersby. Just like the team itself… symmetry, my friends, symmetry. Leafs suck, btw.

Heh, golfing… just like the Maple Leafs every spring!

Raymond – Tampa Bay Rays (MLB)

There’s just no zip to this name and the character is even worse, described as a seadog and wearing large sneakers and a backwards ball cap. Raymond is really just a slacker, complete with unkempt facial hair. Why couldn’t the mascot be a sting ray, with the tag line “I killed Steve Irwin, so don’t mess with us!” Now that would be bad ass.

Bear – Utah Jazz (NBA)

They couldn’t even give their mascot a decent nickname? The marketing department sat around and just settled with Bear? I’d be more impressed with Bear if he occasionally picked up a musical instrument and belted out some jazz scat tunes. Then again, the Jazz name doesn’t even work in Utah and is only a carryover from the franchise’s New Orleans origins. Ridiculous all around.

Rowdy – Dallas Cowboys (NFL)

Rowdy looks like Fix-It Felix from Wreck-It Ralph… except he appears a little more Broke Back Mountain than the team would probably want. The Cowboys legacy as a rough and tumble team doesn’t hold up so well when Rowdy is paired with that lineage. He has to be the creepiest looking cowboy I’ve ever seen, making the blood of Clint Eastwood boil to extreme levels.

Spartacat – Ottawa Senators (NHL)

I don’t get the orange hair. Doesn’t the Senators organization know that the world hates gingers!? Not myself, I find them to be loveable folks, but I am a rare breed. Readers know of my love for cats, but this one just doesn’t sit right. The name is okay too, but I just don’t see the necessity for that orange hippie hair. Call me crazy (and I’m sure you have), but I just can’t get past that.

Screech – Washington Nationals (MLB)

How awesome would it be if the Washington Nationals mascot wasn’t a anthropomorphic bald eagle, but was, in fact, Screech from Saved by the Bell!? Other than that minor note, I really don’t have any problem with Screech. He falls in line with the team name and the city the franchise plays out of. I probably should have left him off the list… but that Saved by the Bell thing still bugs me.

Hip Hop the Rabbit – Philadelphia 76ers (NBA)

Sure, basketball teams need to cater to the hip hop market and fans of the music genre, but this is really taking things a little too far. Hip Hop looks like a “gangsta” Trix Rabbit on roids, who instead of searching aimlessly for the beloved cereal, performs slam dunks off trampolines to pass the time. Let’s just hope Hip Hop doesn’t become a casualty of the East-West Rap Feud.

Stinger – Columbus Blue Jackets (NHL)

How anyone could consider an insect cute and cuddly is a question I’ll never be able to answer. Still, this pest was able to find work with the Columbus Blue Jackets, despite being a yellow jacket bug. That mixed with the teams blue colours, has turned him green, just to confuse people even more. I foresee a large swatter and a satisfying splat in Stinger’s future!

Sparky the Dragon – New York Islanders (NHL)

Why a dragon is the mascot for this team is perplexing. Sure, the owner, Charles Wang (heh… wang) is of Asian descent, but is that enough to justify this move? Not to mention he simply transferred the character over from his former Arena Football League franchise and you have the makings of a mascot conspiracy. We must form a task force to get to the bottom of this!

Dinger – Colorado Rockies (MLB)

The Colorado Rockies entered Major League Baseball around the time that Barney the Dinosaur was huge for many youngsters. I guess they decided to capitalize on that marketing craze when conceptualizing Dinger. Apparently, making Dinger a Triceratops was based on reports of dinosaur fossils being discovered as the franchise built its Coors Field stadium. I have to say that I do like the name Dinger, though.

Bernie Brewer – Milwaukee Brewers (MLB)

This mascot has to be the closest thing to resemble a 1970’s porn star in the sporting world, complete with a full, bushy, handlebar moustache. I bet under that jersey is a chest full of wild, curly hair and if we keep travelling downwards, a Ron Jeremy-esque member. The Brewer probably drinks a ton, too, and may be the best candidate on this list to party with!

Youppi – Montreal Canadiens (NHL)

The only thing worse than a bad mascot is a bad mascot that was meant for another team. When the Montreal Expos were relocated to become the Washington Nationals, Youppi became a free agent, quickly snapped up by the Canadiens. I do have to give credit to Youppi for being the first mascot ever kicked out of a Major League Baseball game, which occurred in 1989 following LA Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda complaining to umps about the mascot’s behaviour.

Drink #255: Furry Purple Squirrel

Rim glass with Grape Candy Powder
1 oz Blue Curacao
1 oz Light Rum
1 oz Coconut Rum (I used Malibu)
Top with Club Soda
Splash of Lime Juice
Dash of Grenadine
Garnish with a Maraschino Cherry

I must admit, I left off the many amateur sport mascots that could have filled three of these lists. Olympic mascots have always been ridiculous too. Just to keep things simple, I only focused on professional team mascots. Did I miss any? Leave a message after the beep. BEEEEEEEP!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
This is an interesting recipe that includes floating the Coconut Rum on top of the drink right before serving. I picked this cocktail because it somewhat went with the topic of today’s post and because the blend of ingredients intrigued me. My Grape Candy Powder rim worked out better than others. I still don’t understand why every drink that purports itself to be purple never turns out that way and remains blue. Maybe I’m not using enough Grenadine, but then again, I don’t want to use a ton of Grenadine.

September 10 – Homeward Bound

Posted on September 10, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Welcome Back

Some players just don’t look right in jerseys that differ from the one they’ve worn for years. In most of the big leagues, athletes can sign one-day contracts so that they may retire as a member of the team that made their career. Other times, a trade brings that star back into the fold. Then, there’s always returning from retirement. Here is some of the greatest returns home in sports history.

Trevor Linden – Vancouver Canucks (NHL)

Trevor Linden, captain of the Vancouver Canucks was traded to the New York Islanders in 1998. After bouncing around to a couple other teams, the Canucks reacquired the heart and soul leader of their last championship appearance team. In Linden’s first game back (which I attended with the Sip Family), he notched a couple points and was named the second star of the game, allowing fans to dedicate all their energy specifically to one of the team’s most legendary figures. A few years later, Linden left the game the right way, serenaded by the fans who adored him for so many years, and making a final trip around the ice surface that hosted so many memories for all involved.

Doug Gilmour – Toronto Maple Leafs (NHL)

Growing up, for some bizarre reason that I may never be able to explain, I was a fan of the Toronto Maple Leafs. Please collect your jaws from the floor… sadly, it’s true. My favourite player was Doug Gilmour, a gritty and talented player, who nearly led the team to their first Stanley Cup since 1967. Gilmour was traded to New Jersey in 1997, but would return to the Leafs at the 2003 trade deadline, causing fans to rejoice. Sadly, in just his second shift back with the team, he collided knee-on-knee with Calgary’s Dave Lowry and was done for the season, later calling it a career that summer.

Hulk Hogan – World Wrestling Entertainment

In the 1980’s, Hulk Hogan’s symbiotic relationship with the then World Wrestling Federation launched both entities into the stratosphere. Working together, Hogan became one of the most popular wrestlers of all-time, while the WWF became the first promotion to enjoy national mainstream exposure and success. Hogan left the company in 1993 to perform in World Championship Wrestling and didn’t return to the soon-to-be-renamed WWE until 2002. He originally returned as a bad guy, but fans would not have any of that, cheering for Hogan to once again become the “Real American” character most had grown up with. They got their wish and fans feverishly ate up the nostalgia act.

Ken Griffey, Jr. – Seattle Mariners (MLB)

Ken Griffey, Jr. grew up in the Seattle Mariners organization, debuting in 1989 and even playing alongside his father, Ken Griffey, Sr. Griffey became the face of the franchise and even the entire league, adorning video games, posters, t-shirts, and other merchandise. The slugger was traded to the Cincinnati Reds in 2000, as he wished to play closer to home and be more involved in the lives of his children. Griffey’s numbers declined following the trade, but petitions were signed by Seattle fans to bring him back. Finally, in 2009, Griffey returned to the Mariners. His second tenure had its issues, like Griffey being accused of napping in the clubhouse during games, but he was honoured into the team’s Hall of Fame in August 2013.

Michael Jordan – Chicago Bulls (NBA)

After winning three straight NBA titles in the early 90’s, there was nothing left for Michael Jordan to accomplish. When his father was murdered that summer, Jordan retired from basketball and decided to try his hand at professional baseball, hoping to realize his father’s dream of him playing in the Majors. When his baseball dream fizzled out, it was back to the hard court and the Bulls for Jordan. Another three NBA Championships followed before Jordan left the game again in 1999. His last return to basketball was with the Washington Wizards, a team he had part-ownership with and had been President of Basketball Operations.

Mario Lemieux – Pittsburgh Penguins (NHL)

Like Jordan, Mario Lemieux kept returning to the game he loved after time away from the rink proved he still had too much passion for the sport to watch from the sidelines. Super Mario returned from cancer and a retirement to put up all-star level numbers and pad his legacy as one of the game’s greatest players. While he never won another Stanley Cup, he was an integral member of Canada’s gold medal victory at the 2002 Winter Olympics and also saved the Pittsburgh Penguins franchise as owner of the team, ushering in the Sidney Crosby era.

Drink #253: Homeward Bound

1.5 oz Spiced Rum (I used Sailor Jerry’s)
Top with Lemonade
Garnish with Lemon Wheel

What was your favourite return home? As above, it can be an athlete, an actor, or hell, it could be Ron Jeremy’s long-awaited return to the world of pornography!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
This was a simple, but very enjoyable cocktail. I love the name about as much as I adore Sailor Jerry’s Spiced Rum and the moment I saw this recipe advertised at a local bar, I knew I’d be making it when I went home. The caramel-flavour of the Spiced Rum works nicely with the tart Lemonade and makes for one fine drink!

September 9 – Wipeout

Posted on September 9, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Lightning Round

And we’re back… day two of our tour through the wasteland that has become my mind, as we reminisce about my favoruite game shows from past and present. Let’s spin the wheel, make the deal, and get down to some prize-winning action!

Lingo

This great game show is a little reminiscent of Wheel of Fortune (which will not be on this list because Pat Sajak pisses me off!) with the difference being that people try to guess a five-letter word based off of the first letter and any letters they reveal in their guess gets lit up too. After a team wins the round, they choose numbers out of a bin, trying to make a bingo-type line on their scoreboard to win a round. Fun stuff for all ages!

Chuck Woolery gets his balls played with!

Classic Concentration

This is another game show board game that I had when I was younger and I loved it. Players had to match prize panels to reveal the board underneath and then solve a rebus (pictogram) puzzle to win the game. Playing my home version, I loved collecting all the prizes I could and imaging how awesome my future dream home would be. Puzzle solving? Yeah, I was pretty awesome at that, too!

Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego

One of the best things about game shows as a kid is that you could actually learn something while being entertained. It is perhaps thanks to shows like Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego? that I realized how useless reading really was! I also learned a lot about geography that has since been washed out of my brain by years of alcohol abuse, but I’ll always have the memories… or not. Long live Rockapella!

Supermarket Sweep

The parody they did of this show on Married with Children was amazing with perennial losers, the Bundy family, lying, cheating, and stealing in their attempt to win $1000 worth of free groceries. There was also a version geared towards kids that involved toy shopping at Toys R’ Us. The show was called Super Toy Run and it allowed children the chance to gather as many action figures, dolls, games, and other gadgets as they could in a five-minute window.

Stump the Schwab

This sports trivia competition pitted contestants against Howie Schwab, a statistician with ESPN who really knew his stats! My only complaint about the show is that it was heavy in American sports stats, but why shouldn’t it be… it was an American show on an American network after all. I tried to play along, but often couldn’t keep up, especially if they delved into college sports.

Legends of the Hidden Temple

I didn’t get to see this show too often because it was a Nickelodeon series, but anytime we were travelling and our hotel had that channel, you can bet Broski Sip and I were trying to track down airings. This show was an early attempt at blending live action and computer animation, making it seem as if kids were in a virtual video game. The show offered some education too, with mythological tales setting up each episode.

Video & Arcade Top 10

A Canadian production that must have been a marketing godsend to video game companies. The show put four players against each other, competing to have the most points or get to the furthest level in whatever video game was being highlighted before time ran out. They also reviewed the top movies and music of the time and offered video game tips. The winner at the end of the competition would get to pull a ball from a bin and take home the corresponding prize.

Wipeout

By now, you little sippers know that I love seeing people take insane falls and this show has them in spades! The humour provided by hosts John Anderson and John Henson is an added bonus and sideline reporter Jill Wagner is a total pleasure for the eyes. Taking a shot at the show opening Qualifier, the prize-awarding Wipeout Zone, or any other obstacle course the show has punished contestants with would be an honour and privilege!

Drink #252: Wipeout

0.75 oz Melon Liqueur (I used Midori)
0.75 oz Amaretto
Top with Lemon-Lime Soda
Garnish with Raspberries and Strawberries

Looking back at all these shows, I see quite clearly that I had a wonderfully entertaining childhood. Sadly, they just don’t really do kids game shows anymore. I know there’s a Wipeout-themed series called Splatalot! out there, but I can’t think of much else that caters to the little ones… and that makes me sad. Have I missed your favourite game show? You know where to find me!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
This was a good drink, but it was sweet. I used the Berries on top to emulate the big balls used on Wipeout. This cocktail also provided my first opportunity to use Midori and for long-time readers, you know how much I love melons… and by that I mean the flavour, not the body parts (although I like those too)!

Sip Advisor

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