October 29 – Angel of Death

Posted on October 29, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Trick & Treat

Halloween is right around the corner and I’ve been studying up on the event. I want to make sure that every little sipper out there has a wonderful night. So, here is some info and tips on how to make that happen:

Facts about Trick-or-Treat

Drink #302: Angel of Death

1 oz Cupcake Vodka
1 oz Fluffed Marshmallow Vodka
Top with Milk
Garnish with Chocolate Shavings

I hope everyone has their candy purchased, costumes picked, and pumpkins carved. Have an amazing evening, y’all!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
This drink was a decent dessert option and the Chocolate Shavings were an enjoyable touch on top of the cocktail. Like the name suggests, the recipe seems angelic, but it can kill, too!

October 25 – Candy Corn

Posted on October 25, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Rest in Peace

Most people aren’t very comfortable going through cemeteries and you can count the Sip Advisor as one of those folk. That said, there are some really beautiful and unique graveyards out there. Here are some from the around the world, that have to be seen to be believed:

Merry Cemetery – Sapanta, Romania

Each person’s tombstone is marked with art that depicts that person or a memorable scene from their life, with the images joined by poetry to tell the story of the piece. Elements of humour are often found in the prose, as the local culture believes that death is a moment of joy with a better life to come. The Merry Cemetery has become a national tourist attraction.

Cementerio General – Santiago, Chile

Over two millions people have been interred at the Cementerio General. Every day people neighbour the plot space taken up by former presidents and other nobles of the country. The largest cemetery in South America features tombs piled on top of each other in rows that seem to stretch forever. This final resting place is decorated extensively with flowers and other mementos.

Père-Lachaise – Paris, France

Home to the remains of musician Jim Morrison (which causes rock music to often bellow through the cemetery) and writer Oscar Wilde (fans leave lipstick kisses on his tomb), among others, Père-Lachaise features numerous statues and winding streets lined with crypts. Joggers even use the sight for their daily exercise routine.

Forest Lawn – Los Angeles, California

Resting place for some of the world’s greatest stars, this site is located on the Hollywood Hills and overlooks some of the city’s studios below. Before it was home to famous corpses, it was the setting for D.W. Griffith’s climactic battle scenes in ‘The Birth of a Nation’. The place has been described as a “theme-park necropolis” thanks to all the dignitaries laid to rest there.

Waverley Cemetery – Sydney, Australia

Overlooking the Pacific Ocean, this cemetery has a wonderful view for those visiting or even interred at the site. The graves of many of the folks who shaped the country of Australia are located in Waverley Cemetery, as well as over 200 sites for casualties of war.

Lone Fir Cemetery – Portland, Oregon

This cemetery allows families to plant trees and flowers near the burial spots of their loved ones, causing Lone Fir to become a community garden of sorts as a result. Many of the Chinese immigrants who helped build the city of Portland are interred here. The Pioneer Rose Garden is also part of the property.

Haunted Mansion – Disney Parks

It’s always a treat to go through the cemetery area of the Haunted Mansion queues and read the clever passages on the tombstones. These markers are more than just entertainment for guests, though. They honour some of the notable members of the Disney organization. For example, Leota Tombs has a plot here. She was the inspiration for Madame Leota on the ride.

Drink #298: Candy Corn

Rim glass with Crushed Candy Corn
1.5 oz Cupcake Vodka
0.5 oz Amaretto
Top with half Orange Juice and half Milk
Splash of Club Soda

Perhaps after researching all these interesting graveyards, I won’t feel so apprehensive anymore while visiting or even seeing a cemetery… or perhaps everything will remain unchanged!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
Setting up the Candy Corn rim on this drink was a complete pain in the ass, as pieces kept on disintegrating and not behaving as I had hoped. That said, the cocktail actually tastes like Candy Corn… and I should know. I stupidly ate every single piece that fell apart, so now I’m an expert on what that particular treat tastes like. If I ever see a piece of Candy Corn again, it will be too soon!

October 6 – Obsession

Posted on October 6, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Curious Collections

Growing up as an aspiring Sip Magnate, I had a number of collections I was dedicated to: I collected hockey cards, wrestling figures, DVDs, and now liquor. Today, I’d like to look at some of the more specialized collections in the world, but don’t worry, I’m not here to gross anyone out and won’t look at the kind of people that collect their own ear wax or belly button lint. Here are some of the most interesting collections I found:

Soda

It’s hard to believe there’s even a culture of people that collect various beverages, but it does bring up a sort of nostalgia when you see a beloved product from your childhood that is no longer being distributed. The one problem with this collection is that you can only look at it and not taste it, which is the whole reason you probably enjoyed the product in the first place. I guess you could drink the beverage and just keep the can. That would make your collection even rarer.

Handcuffs

This dude (Joseph W. Lauher) must really be into BDSM to have so many pairs of handcuffs in his possession. I guess they do provide interesting stories and history, as well, but you can’t deny the handcuffs roll in sexual deviancy. Lauher has everything from thumbcuffs to leg irons and has even created pages about escape artists. If this gets you going, not that there’s anything wrong with that (Mrs. Sip!), you might want to check out his collection.

Sugar Packets

Phil Miller began his collection of sugar packets in 1978. While you wouldn’t think there’s much variance to packets around the world, you have to remember that most companies make their own packets complete with their own branding. Miller has two pages dedicated to packets found at restaurants and another for hotel finds. There’s even three pages full of U.S. presidents adorning the coffee enhancing products.

Chocolate Wrappers

Let’s be honest, everyone loves chocolate. Even those that suffer from lactose intolerance will find a loophole to be able to enjoy the cocoa stuff. Once you’ve eaten the treat however, is there really any reason to keep the wrapper. I say no, but Martin Mihál may tend to disagree. He has collected wrappers from around the world… seriously, it looks like every country is represented on his site. Brotha surely has diabetes by this point!

Scratch Cards

Mrs. Sip loves scratch cards. When we’re out grabbing groceries, she’ll often pick up a card for fun and the chance to win a couple dollars. Thankfully, she hasn’t taken her passion for scratching to the level Victor Paul Taylor has. Taylor could be sitting on a gold mine of winnings, but he may never discover how much money is actually there. He keeps his precious card in mint condition, including never having scratched any of the possible winners.

Toothpaste

Dr. Val Kolpakov may have taken his dentistry too far with this obsession. Sure, toothpaste comes in a variety of styles and flavours, but does that make them special? I suppose the same can be said for my liquor collection, but at least I drink the stuff. You just know that this is the kind of guy that gives out toothbrushes and toothpaste for Halloween… only his stuff is vintage, which means expired and probably not worth a dime.

Napkins

Ma Sip loves her festive napkins, but even she would never take her passion so far as to collect the mouth and hand wipes. Helena Vnouckova, on the other hand, has done exactly that, putting together a collection of napkins that would be suitable for any occasion. Although, I doubt she ever puts them out for use and instead hordes them for her selfish needs. Similarly, there’s also a guy who collects moist towellette packs. Perhaps the two should hook up!?

Condiment Packets

I’ve shared my love of various condiments with all you little sippers. And while I thoroughly believe that sauces make a meal, it has never crossed my mind to collect these condiment delivery devices. Like the sugar packets above, each eatery usually brands their own packaging, making items unique. I wonder if he has any discontinued sauces that could go for great sums of cash on the condiment black market!?

Drink #279: Obsession

1 oz Amaretto (I used Disaronno)
1 oz Crème de Cacao
1 oz Chocolate Liqueur
Top with Milk
Garnish with Chocolate Shavings

After researching for this article, it seems that if an item exists, someone collects it. Join me tomorrow as we look at celebrity collectors and the odd things they choose to spend their millions of dollars on!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
My favourite part of this cocktail was the Chocolate Shavings… that’s not to say the other ingredients weren’t good, as well, but the chocolate was delicious and it being dark and bitter helped balance the overall sweetness of the drink.

October 4 – Campfire Martini

Posted on October 4, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

It Ain’t So Bad

Now that we’ve nestled into the cooler months of the year, it’s nice to bring out a drink like this and reminisce about the summer gone by. Fall and winter aren’t all that bad, though. You just have to find ways to deal with the change. Here are my favourite ways to spend the “indoor” months!:

Get Caught Up on TV

Gone are the days of playing outdoors, but that’s not necessarily a horrible thing. Now we get to snuggle up under warm blankies and watch all the TV we neglected over the summer. Mrs. Sip and I have so many shows, past and present, to get up to speed on. Among them: Sons of Anarchy and Venture Bros. Plus, there’s also all the returning shows that we watch regularly: Walking Dead, Community, Big Bang Theory, Parks and Rec, etc.

Movie Marathon

In a similar vein to our TV habits, movie marathons are much easier to do without the sun enticing you to come outside and play. There were some pretty good flicks that came out over the summer that should be released to homes soon and there’s a lot of stuff to get caught up on from the past that you hear about over time. At least in my own theatre, I can eat all the potato chips I want and can suppress the enjoyment of popcorn.

Vacation to Tropical Locales

I don’t fully understand the need to go on vacation during your own summer. Why would you leave your home when it finally gets to the point where it’s worth living in? I like to save my vacation time for when the weather is garbage (raining buckets or freezing you to the core) and getting the eff out of dodge. Nothing can fend off those winter blues better than leaving winter far behind, in favour of sunny beaches, warm breezes, and poolside bars, if you can throw that in, too!

Winter Sports

From a simple ice skating session to more extraneous activities like skiing, snowboarding, and hockey, there’s much to do in the darker half of the year. I find the winter is a perfect time to mold your body back into shape as the desire to be anywhere other than the gym is lessened. If you’re a weightlifter, as I often purport to be, you’re also not sweating buckets in a stuffy gym, thanks to the cooler temperatures.

Picnic by the Fire

A favourite pastime for Mrs. Sip and I is to grab enough food for a King’s feast, turn up the fireplace, and spend an evening sans electronic distractions and clothing (if I can convince the missus!). Regardless of wardrobe choices, it can provide the perfect romantic setting for catching up with your best friend, sharing a few dozen laughs (I’m a pretty funny guy, after all), and forgetting all about the bitter cold that’s brewing outside!

Drink #277: Campfire Martini

Rim glass with Graham Cracker Crumbs
1.5 oz Smores Vodka (I used Three Olives)
Top with Milk
Splash of Chocolate Syrup
Garnish with a Toasted Marshmallow

What’s your best strategy for fighting off old man winter? I’m always looking to learn new techniques to enhance my all-round godness!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
This drink was delicious. A wonderful dessert martini that Mrs. Sip and myself couldn’t get enough of. The Graham Cracker Crumb rim works out better than most other rims. Creating the Toasted Marshmallow without the availability of a campfire was interesting… I had to use a small candle and hope for the best!

September 22 – Happy Birthday-tini

Posted on September 22, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Sip Advisor Appreciation Day

Guess what day it is today? That’s right, it’s MY BIRTHDAY!!! *streamers and confetti fall from the roof of every person reading this post* While I have yet to perfect the streamer technology, it is the duty of every little sipper to find some way to honour yours truly. If you’re having trouble coming up with a tribute, here are some suggestions I’m more than happy to pass along!:

Do a Site Drink Challenge

To this date, we’ve made 264 drinks and it would be some feat if a fine fellow or fellowette out there tried to have each and every one of them… in one day, no less. If you don’t feel up to the challenge, you could resort to doing a Site Shot Challenge, but even in that case, you’d have to down 38 shooters. Last idea, just try all the 5-star cocktails or original recipes. Ready, set, go!

Donate to the Cause

If anybody actually wants to do this, whether it is in monetary form, booze supply form, or some variation of a licensing or endorsement deal, please let me know. Remember, I’m conducting this project from Canada, home to some of the worst liquor taxes in the history of the known world. Monopoly money is also a form of currency that I operate under, so feel free to make it rain for me!

Suggest a Recipe or Article Idea

With a pretty steady readership, I’m still a little surprised more people don’t write in to voice their opinion, give me crap about my opinions, or suggest drinks and topics (for all the readers who have made comments to me in person, as I’ve have previously pointed out, my short term memory isn’t what it’s used to be since I started this blog!). Here’s your impetus if you want to let your voice be heard. If you think I’m the cat’s pajamas, let me know. Mrs. Sip has this theory that I’m not as cool as I think I am, so it would be wonderful to have some empirical evidence to back up my hypothesis!

Have a Parade

Using an array of booze-themed floats, disrupt the traffic patterns of your hometown and let chaos ensue. Don’t worry about any repercussions, as it won’t be long before a conga line of sorts grows from the multitude of Sip Advisor supporters. I want this to be the alcoholic version of a Pride parade… outlandish outfits, sex toys, and just a wild party atmosphere. The only difference: lots of liquor and public intoxication (I guess that happens at Pride, too)!

Have a Drink in My Honour

If this is how you choose to salute the Sip Man, you have to fully recite the following statement before AND after downing a shot or cocktail: “To the Sip Advisor, the greatest man on the face of the earth. May he always have a cocktail nearby and a Mrs. Sip sans clothing!” It would probably work best if you used one of my recipes, preferably an original formula, but I’m not going to tell you how to live your life!

Erect a Statue of My Likeness

I don’t care what material you use, although I am partial to macaroni art. I feel macaroni is one of the few substances that can truly project my supple curves. I don’t really have time to pose for you, so if you need a photo, just give me a shout and I’ll make sure to send one of me doing something epic like napping, playing video games, or sitting on a park bench feeding kitties.

This would work, too!

Get Blotto and Spread the Sip Gospel

This could be summed up as “Tell a Friend” about the site. The more this online booze heaven grows, the better for all you little sippers. Like some kind of demonic monster, I feed on the energy of my loyal readers and the tears of those who just can’t handle what I’m laying down. The more I level up with experience points, the better and soon the words “global phenomenon” and The Sip Advisor will always been mentioned together. Get in on the ground floor!

Like us on Facebook

That’s right, we have advanced to the point where we are pursuing social media as a legitimate advertising tool (I’m sure we’re ahead of the curve on this!) and our little slice of the global phenomenon can be found here. All posts will show up through that page, so you’ll never miss an update ever again!

Drink #265: Happy Birthday-tini

Rim glass with Sprinkles
1.5 oz Smores Vodka
1.5 oz Creme de Cacao
1 oz Amaretto
0.5 oz Chocolate Liqueur
Top with Milk
Garnish with Sprinkles (can’t have enough!)

It’s kind of ironic that my birthday marks the last 100 days of the year and therefore, this 365-day drink challenge. Let’s make it a memorable centurion of drinks!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
I liked this drink a fair bit. I don’t know if it was helped along by the fact that it’s my birthday recipe and I’m feeling all jovial, but the taste was very satisfying, as well. The Sprinkle Rim was amazing and I was so happy with how it turned out. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

September 17 – Bushwacker

Posted on September 17, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Blendz

Rum has greatly benefitted from the explosion of flavoured spirits, with perhaps vodka being the only alcohol that has enjoyed the expansion more. There are certainly some interesting rum-based selections out there. Here are some worth looking out for:

Cajun-Spiced Rum

Mrs. Sip picked this up for me while she was recently in New Orleans and today’s drink has inspired me to finally crack the bottle open and give it a shot. The Cajun Spiced Rum hails from the Old New Orleans Rum Distillery, which Mrs. Sip got to enjoy a tour of. We’ve all heard of spiced rums, but Cajun-spiced? Well, that’s a whole different story. If the spices do for my drink what they do for chicken, seafood, and other eats, then I think we’re in for some fun!

Captain Morgan: Tattoo/Bite

The Tattoo blend of blackberries, jalapenos, and black pepper is delicious and gets my endorsement for a cheaper but delicious rum. There are mixed reviews, but Mrs. Sip and I grabbed a bottle for our room in Las Vegas recently and made short work of the liquor. As for Bite, Ma and Pa Sip brought this back from one of their travels and put it out for a party shortly thereafter. It didn’t last very long once folks got a taste of the lime-infused spirit.

Bacardi Dragon Berry Rum

Recently, I picked up a bottle of Bacardi Torched Cherry Rum, which was quite delicious with its chocolate overtone. As a bonus, attached to the bottle was a sample size of Bacardi Dragonberry Rum (soon to be presented on The Sip Advisor). I can’t wait to try this spirit, which is said to be a mix of strawberry and dragon berry fruit. I’ll keep you little sippers updated!

Malibu Fresh/Red

I’m looking forward to trying both of these Malibu offerings. Fresh combines coconut rum with mint and I think this would be perfect for mojitos, while Red adds tequila to the coconut rum the company is best known for. I like how Malibu is working hard to try different flavours and I hope they continue to pursue this route in the future.

Ron Miel Honey Rum

As a fan of honey whiskey, I can only assume that honey rum would also fare well with my palate. That lingering sweetness that honey-flavoured alcohols offer is the perfect finish to a cocktail sip and works nicely to dull the sometimes harsher tones of the liquor (whiskey or rum) itself. The added essence also makes them fun to play with in the mixology world.

Whistling Andy Hibiscus-Coconut Rum

I’m not entirely sure who Whistling Andy is, but I like his gamble of putting hibiscus and coconut together. Mrs. Sip brought back with her some hibiscus leaves from Egypt a number of years back, which we used to make juice. Now I’m thinking we should use what’s still left of the shrubbery to blend our own infused rums! Things are about to get messy!

Anyone else notice the perfectly placed bikini butt in the background!

Redrum

This brand infuses the liquor with mango, pineapple, coconut, and berries, which must hit the tongue from a number of different directions. I’m very curious as to how it all comes together, so if anyone wants to send me a bottle for a through taste analysis, you know where to find me. Seriously, just because it’s murder spelled backwards doesn’t scare this hombre.

Sweet Georgia Belle

This product offers an interesting blend of peach and mango, as part of a rum liqueur. Perhaps it is meant to mimic the taste of a debutant, but that sounds like the company would be bordering on some serious legal implications. Let’s just assume they got wild and crazy and threw the two fruits together hoping for the best. I hope for that, too!

Drink #260: Bushwacker

1 oz Rum (I used Cajun Spiced)
0.75 oz Kahlua
0.75 oz Crème de Cacao
Top with half Coconut Cream and half Milk
Garnish with Coconut Shavings and Chocolate Sprinkles

What rum blends out there have you tried and thoroughly enjoyed or have come across and want to try, willing to give up your first born child to taste the beautiful elixir? Don’t worry, you’re far from alone!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
The Cajun Spiced Rum is quite tasty with a slight twist on the usual spiced rum concept. Between all the ingredients, you get hints of chocolate, coconut, coffee and spiced rum, all combining to make a very nice drink.

September 8– Double Jeopardy

Posted on September 8, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Come on Down

Not surprisingly, today’s drink turns my mind towards game shows. I’ve always been a fan of game shows… at least until they became what they are today, involving little talent or skill, where all you have to do is select a briefcase or have your car repossessed (actually, I really like Repo Games!). Here are some of my favourites in a two-day tour from childhood to present day!:

The Price is Right

My favourite show when I was younger and I was home from school when feeling ill or I was enthralled with all the joys of summer. Bob Barker is a friggin’ legend and Happy Gilmore knows all about messing with Barker’s beauties! Games like Plinko, Mountain Climber, and Hole-in-One (or Two), were among my favourites. To have your name called at the show would be a sure highlight and spinning the big wheel would be even better!

Family Feud

Good lord some of the people the producers ask to answer their polls are stupid… and some contestants are even dumber. No game show gets me shouting at the TV screen more than Family Feud, except perhaps Jeopardy, but in that case I’m calmly and educationately (yeah, I know it’s not a real word) answering queries. Mrs. Sip and I even bought a home edition of the game to give it a shot… I lost!

Kidstreet

I actually know two different people who appeared on this Canadian game show as youngsters. It was similar in fashion to the Newlywed Game, although you were teamed with your sibling and the final round was Classic Concentration-like with a rebus puzzle to be solved. The greatest draw for any child watching was the prize wall they teased the contestants with. Winners got their pick of all these toys and gadgets, which left a young Sip Advisor drooling.

Jeopardy!

While I prefer the Saturday Night Live Celebrity Jeopardy clips over the real show, it isn’t that bad on its own. I feel that I’d be a decent Jeopardy contestant, as I usually do well playing from home, but I’m really not the brightest bulb due to my lack of desire for reading and learning important information, so I probably wouldn’t be able to pull off a Ken Jennings-type run of 74 consecutive victories.

Fun House

I remember bits and pieces of this show from my childhood. I think every kid wanted to take a trip through the “Fun House,” grabbing tags that would correspond with various prizes. It always looked like kids on the show were having fun thanks to the outlandish games played. There was also an adult version of the show, titled College Mad House that would have put to shame any frat house kegger!

American Gladiators

Staying up late as a youngster is very memorable. I remember sleepover birthdays at the age of 24 (just kidding, I was probably 7 or 8 – we are talking about the original Gladiator series and not the revival, although I enjoyed that version, too) where we’d watch American Gladiators. The mini-games played on the show were eye-opening and I would have loved to get tossed around by any of the muscle-bound Gladiators or tackled the feared Eliminator obstacle course!

Guts

American Gladiators for kids (although they actually had that as well – Gladiators 2000), which climaxed with a trip up the Aggro Crag, a fake mountain, which challenged kids with lighting and smoke effects as they had to hit a series of checkpoints, while racing to glory. Even if you finished last, you walked away with a bronze medal. Too bad there wasn’t a home edition of the Aggro Crag handed out as a consolation prize, as well!

Beat the Geeks

Putting nerds in their proper place as stars! This show pitted contestants against “geeks” in a certain field (TV, movie, music) as well as a guest geeks from popular culture of the time, including South Park, wrestling, Friends, and even the ‘Nudity in Movies’ geek. I swear I could have been the Wrestling Geek on this show… sadly I’ll never know, unless he’s up for a good ol’ fashion mat duel. The fact there even was a wrestling geek was cool enough, as it is.

Drink #251: Double Jeopardy

1 oz Frangelico
1 oz Black Sambuca
Splash of Milk
Blend with Ice
Garnish with Peanuts

I loved it when Mrs. Sip’s parents had a satellite dish and we were able to watch the Game Show Network together. Seeing all the new shows mixed in with some classic footage was one of the reasons I stayed with her as long as I did!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
This drink wasn’t all that bad. I was curious about how the Sambuca would taste with all the other ingredients. Vanilla Ice Cream is supposed to be part of the recipe, but sadly, ours had gone kind of fuzzy and funky, so I just went with ice to get the frozen cocktail done. Galliano may have made a nice alternative in a pinch!

September 3 – Unicorn

Posted on September 3, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Animal Crackers

Recently, a big deal in social media was made over Scotland’s national animal (to be revealed very shortly). That got me thinking about the rest of the world and which creatures have had the honour of proudly and respectfully representing a country. No nation will be off limits, as I am definitely going to skewer my home country. Here are some of the best selections:

Unicorn – Scotland

For some reason, a mythological animal for Scotland actually makes sense given they’re a mythological country! I’m just messin’ with ya Scots. Don’t forget, we here in Canada still have strong ties to the U.K. despite our distance from the motherland. The unicorn was actually a symbol of the Scottish royal family. The more you know *rainbow swipe*!

Beaver – Canada

Speaking of my part of the world, we chose an animal which just begs for other citizens to make double entendres about how much we love it! Bring on the jokes, we can take them! The beaver is a very industrious animal, building their dams for shelter. They are also good recyclers, using trees that nobody needs anymore. Stupid oxygen-enabling trees!

Lion – Belgium/Bulgaria/Luxembourg/Netherlands/U.K.

Are there even lions in most of these countries (that aren’t caged in a zoo)? Did they just choose a bad ass animal to look cool among the international community, not realizing how many other countries also claimed the feline? A place like Ethiopia or Kenya having the lion as their national animal makes sense…since, you know, lions actually live there.

King Cobra – India

This is an intimidating choice, warning us all that the Indian population can be subdued with hypnotic music, but at the same time are deadly predators that can strike in an instant and cause accelerated death. If that’s really the case though, why does it take me so long to get a live person when I call for customer service?

See, cobras can be cute and cuddly!

Gallic Rooster – France

It kind of makes sense that France would relate themselves to a bunch of cocks, am I right!? I’m sure most French people are actually quite nice, but Parisians take the cake on being dicks. We once had a cab driver who refused to acknowledge our request to go to the Eiffel Tower until we flipped it and said “Tour Eiffel”… Va te faire foutre!!

Persian Cat – Iran

While most would view the Iranians with some fear and hostility, how can you do that when they picked a freakin’ fluffy cat as one of their national animals! Ma and Pa Sip have a Persian-ish cat at home and she’s a darling…unless you try to move her off the bed. Not very friendly to her fellow felines either now that I come to think about…

Dolphin – Greece

Of course the Greeks would pick the most sexual of creatures when selecting their national animal. They did, after all, invent a great deal of the carnal moves and positions in existence, rivaling the Indians and their Karma Sutra. Apparently, dolphins also play a role in Greek mythology, as helpers of mankind. Aquaman must be jealous!

Dodo – Mauritius

Good job Mauritius (wherever the hell you are) for picking an animal that has long been extinct. Perhaps your fate will be much the same. Seems like you’re asking for a rough future with your choice in animal worship.

Bull – Spain

Nothing like killing your national animal for the entertainment of screaming, blood-thirsty fans! What’s that, you also show it respect by tying up its testicles before you taunt, tease, assault, and slaughter the beast? Hmmm, you Spanish have a funny way of showing affection. At least the bull sometimes gets revenge with a thunderous gore!

Bulldog – U.K.

Scotland’s pick of the unicorn doesn’t look so bad anymore. At least it’s a majestic creature. Meanwhile, England picked one of the foulest mutts in the dog world. With a face only an owner could love and enough drool to flood an apartment, the bulldog seems an unlikely choice for people who a nation of prim and proper tea drinkers.

Drink #246: Unicorn

1 oz Irish Crème
0.5 oz Brandy
0.5 oz Kahlua
0.5 oz Vodka
Splash of Cointreau
Dash of Melon Liqueur
Top with Milk
Garnish with a Pink Marshmallow

What do you think of some of these national animals? Is there a country you wish I had targeted with my adept lampooning? I can take the heat, just as much as I can give it out! By the way, here’s a quiz on the subject of national animals (I hope you were taking notes)… enjoy!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I really enjoyed the Melon Liqueur finish. It went really well with the rest of the recipe, highlighted by the Irish Crème. Garnishing the cocktail with a Pink Marshmallow seemed like the perfect addition for a Unicorn-themed drink.

September 2 – Coffee and Donuts

Posted on September 2, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

Dirty Jobs

As we celebrate Labour Day and the average worker out there, I’m just happy to have the day off and not be anywhere near the realm of work (though living it up at the Bellagio in Vegas sure helps). That said, my job ain’t all that bad. On the flipside, here are some vocations that take some special people to get done:

Waste Collector

Affectionately known as a garbage man (or sanitation engineer if you’re being all PC about it), I have the utmost respect for these hardworking folk, Cousin Sip being one of them. I even tagged along with him on a couple occasions while in high school. The job is extremely physical and not without its dangers. Still, it is pretty cool to be riding on the back of one of these behemoth machines and throwing different smash-able items into the compactor.

Fast-Food Server

While I think it is prudent for every person out there to work one crappy job in their lifetime (mine was as a grocery store deli clerk for four years), so they respect every other position they have in the future, I thankfully never had to work at a fast food joint. The minimal pay and sometimes abusive working conditions just don’t seem worth it, but it can provide employees with a great skill set to use in their future.

Gas Station Attendant

Ah, where Mrs. Sip earned her crappy job cred, making minimum wage and having to deal with people trying to buy smokes without I.D. and people raging at the gas prices. Not to mention the ever-present threat of theft and armed robbery. Most stations now make you pay before you pump to cut down on gas and dash incidents. There have been some that ended tragically with usually young employees trying to stop an occurrence and being killed by the vehicle over a god damn fill-up.

Farmer

Most people would more than hesitate as soon as they heard they had to get up so early in the morning and spend their day dealing with backbreaking labour and uncooperative animals/machinery. These dedicated folk provide us with much of the food we need, including fruits, vegetables, grains, dairy, and meat. For that (and their daughters!), we thank them.

Construction Worker

This can include everything to do with construction, whether that’s building, well, buildings, road work, house repair, and everything else that could fall under that umbrella. Pa Sip was an iron worker for most of my childhood until his back just couldn’t do it anymore. And he’s far from alone as most leave the profession with wrecked bodies. Here’s hoping they have nice beds and couches to retreat to!

Parking Enforcement Officer

The abuse these poor folks take from people who always claim that their meter just expired or they didn’t see various signs or other warnings is totally out of proportion compared to what they get paid. Even people who aren’t being ticketed (and perhaps have never received a citation) target the noble parking violation officer with name calling and dirty looks.

Flight Attendant

We’ve all seen jerks on fligths… now imagine you had to deal with them longer than calling them dirty names under your breath. That is the life of a flight attendant. While I love travelling, I hate travel days, so I would deplore being in a constant cycle of being on the road and never getting to a destination you can enjoy. I salute you, servers of tiny liquor bottles and not enough ice!

Miner

How horrible would it be to live most of your life in the dark? Then add on top of that the danger of cave-ins, explosions, and other risks. Being a miner is also one of the dirtiest jobs out there, deep inside a dark dank cave, covered in filth. That stuff probably never completely washes out and you have to find a spouse that doesn’t mind getting a little dirty with you… but isn’t that what we’re all searching for!?

Drink #245: Coffee and Donuts

1.5 oz Glazed Donut Liqueur
1 oz Kahlua
Top with Milk
Garnish with a TimBit

What a perfect drink to celebrate the working Joe’s out there. What jobs do you think are the worst in existence? What is the most horrible job you ever had? Happy Labour Day, everyone!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
This is a wonderful dessert drink. I quickly falling in love with my Glazed Donut Liqueur, even if I think cocktail ideas using it will be limited. The recipe calls for a Maraschino cherry garnish, but I said eff that and went for a donut hole (TimBit) instead. I’m classy like that!

August 26 – Wedding Cake

Posted on August 26, 2013 by Daniel Wilson

I Thee Wed

Yesterday, Mrs. Sip and I celebrated our first wedding anniversary. With that in mind, I’m reflecting back to our special day last year. Weddings are a funny thing to plan. You put so much energy and effort into one day (a day you’re too busy to enjoy every detail of) and before you know it, the day has passed. I wouldn’t consider myself a wedding coordinator expert and I know every person has their own desires and budget, but for my money, these are the must-haves for your nuptials:

Live Band

While a DJ will get the music job done, I will never regret shelling out a little extra to have a live band at our wedding. Mrs. Sip and I are classic rock fans, so we picked a local band, The BobCats, which specializes in covers of The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, CCR, Van Morrison, and others. We’d seen the guys perform multiple times before and were thrilled when they were available to work our wedding and rock the joint to the early hours of the morning.

These guys were my second choice to play our wedding!

Photographer

This one is pretty obvious and I think very few couples get married nowadays without a professional photographer documenting their special day. Our photos are amazing and will provide instant memories of our wedding as we review them over time. Magnolia Photographic was the perfect choice for our wedding and I’m particularly fond of the stunning shots of Mrs. Sip, who looked drop dead gorgeous that day (and all other days!).

Videographer

When Mrs. Sip and I first started the wedding planning process video was not a priority. Hell, it wasn’t even on the list. Then you start talking to people who fully recommend getting a videographer and you start looking at videos and it suddenly becomes a must-have. We buckled and hired a great little company (RF Weddings) that provided us with an amazing video of highlights from the day. The way they blended song and images together was truly masterful and guests loved watching the same day edit during our reception.

Candy Bar

This was another idea that wasn’t initially on our original list of ideas, but I threw it on the “to do” list last minute after attending a friend’s wedding in Toronto which featured one. Choosing all the candy to put into the bar was a lot of fun, but tracking down containers to display the treats was a little more daunting (we wanted drink-themed glasses like martini and goblet styles). Still, we got it done (thanks to an extra shopping trip by Ma Sip) and the creativity of the friend I put in charge of setting up the station.

This was our actual wedding candy bar… looks pretty sweet, am I right!?

Entertainment during Photos

Mrs. Sip and I didn’t want to kill the buzz of guests between ceremony and reception, when most couples now disappear to do off-site photos with their wedding party. We had a strings band (Musical Occasions) play between the two events, while beverages and snacks were available and we also had a group come out that does magnetic photos of your invitees, which they can take home. On the subject, you also don’t want to force your guests to kill too much time between the ceremony and reception… keep that in mind.

Buffet

Not to take a shot at plate service for dinner, but I prefer buffets, which allow guests to grab exactly what they want, enjoy a variety of options, and eat until they’re about to explode. With all the craziness going down at our wedding, I only managed to load up my plate once and never even got to the dessert edition, although it looked spectacular. The folks at the Shaughnessy Golf & Country Club sure know how to put a spread together.

Limos

It’s your special day and you might as well be travelling in style. Unless you have a cool and unique car for transport, a limo is the best way to achieve this. Ace of Spades Limos worked diligently to get everyone where they needed be when they needed to be there. We used four different limos during the day (one for the bride and bridesmaids, one for the groom and groomsmen, one for the wedding party for photos, and one at the end of the night for the happy couple) and there wasn’t a single issue to deal with.

Hotel

In my books, it just doesn’t seem as special if you go through the whole wedding process, only to return to your normal home that night. Indulge in a little pampering and take off to a nearby hotel. We checked into the Pan Pacific along Vancouver’s waterfront. It was a mch needed respite as it allowed Mrs. Sip and I to get away after the wedding, digest the events of the day together, and enjoy some quality one-on-one time. Couples can also achieve this much needed getaway by immediately leaving for their honeymoon, which is a good way of forgetting all about any post-wedding issues!

Drink #238: Wedding Cake

0.75 oz Gin (I used Tanqueray)
0.75 oz Amaretto
Splash of Pineapple Juice
Splash of Orange Juice
Splash of Milk
Garnish with Wedding Bands (if you got them!)

What are the wedding must-haves that you insist on? Have any issues with my list? Too bad, it’s written in internet stone!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I already made the Wedding Cake Shot, so now it was time to try the martini edition. There are other versions of this drink, but I wanted to see how all these ingredients would work together. The Gin doesn’t overwhelm the taste buds, which surprised me and nothing is out of place at all with this cocktail. Getting the wedding bands to sit just right for the photo was a pain, but it was one of those ideas I just had to see through.

Sip Advisor

The Good, The Bad & The Bubbly

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