Mixer Mania #43 – Stereotypes and Sodas

The love of watermelon, fried chicken and grape soda. These are all things stereotypically associated with African Americans… but I love those things, too. Well, maybe not the grape soda, but it is today’s feature mixer. Let’s take a look at some other odd stereotypes and try not to offend anyone:

Canadians Live in Igloos

Not only do I not live in an igloo, but I don’t know anyone that does. Heck, most folks I know – all typical Canadians – don’t even like being outside much during the winter months. It’s also pretty hard to build an igloo in my neck of the woods, where rain is much more common and we may only get a light snowfall once or twice a year.

Canada Sorry.jpg

Russians Drink Vodka Like Water

This Sip Advisor has been known to do this too, but I don’t have an drop of Russian blood running through my gorgeous body. While Russia does rank as one of the world’s highest consumers of alcohol, I have it on good authority that they drink all liquors like water and don’t confine themselves to simply vodka.

Japanese are Ninjas

Throughout our 2016 trip to Japan, where Mrs. Sip and I travelled extensively around the country, I did not come face-to-face with any ninjas. That makes sense though, as ninjas are supposed to lurk quietly in the shadows. I bet they were everywhere.

Blondes are Dumb, Have More Fun

If being dumb means having more fun, then sign me up! Hold up, given my dirty blonde locks, lack of intelligence and hard drinking ways, I may already be one of the posterchildren for this concept.

Blondes Dumb.jpg

French are Rude

While this might not apply to every French citizen, from my own experiences, I have witnessed a few examples to prove the theory true. Perhaps it needs to read: Parisians Are Rude. This is best exemplified by a cab driver who refused to understand our destination of “Eiffel Tower,” until we changed it to “Tour Eiffel.”

British Have Bad Teeth

In one episode of The Simpsons, Lisa needs braces for her teeth and is shown what will happen if she does not get them with the Big Book of British Smiles, depicting a bevy of unsavoury grins. Perhaps this is caused by another prevalent British stereotype of their cuisine being relatively awful.

Mixer Mania #43: Purple Haze

Purple Haze

  • Rim glass with Sugar
  • 1 oz Amaretto
  • 1 oz Root Beer Schnapps
  • Top with Grape Soda
  • Splash of Milk

What other stereotypes leave you scratching your head as to where the idea was ever conceived? I think I survived the article without causing too many international incidents!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I picked this drink to profile because of the interesting recipe. The result was a pretty decent drink that Mrs. Sip described as a girlie drink… I beg to differ!

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Mixer Mania #1 – The Good Doctor

One of my favourite pops – or sodas for the American audience – is Dr. Pepper. With that in mind, today, we look at those folks out there who are better known as doctors, despite having never earned a doctorate.

Doc Holliday

Although he left his career as a dentist for the wild, wild west, the nickname stuck and John Henry ‘Doc’ Holliday became a legend. Holliday is most famous for his role in the Gunfight at the O.K. Corral, where he joined with lawman Wyatt Earp and company to battle a group of outlaws in Tombstone, Arizona.

doc-holliday-wyatt-earp

Dr. Death

Professional wrestling is full of great nicknames and one of the best went to Steve Williams. The name came from William’s high school wrestling days, when he was forced to wrestle in a hockey goalie mask and his coach dubbed him with the moniker. Sadly, Williams died in 2009, following a battle with throat cancer.

Dr. J

Also known by his real name, Julius Erving, the Basketball Hall of Fame member was known for being a trailblazer in the art of slam dunks. The Doctor was a nickname given to Erving by a high school friend who he called The Professor. Other names, such as ‘The Claw’ and ‘Black Moses’ just didn’t stick as well as Dr. J.

julius-erving-doctor

Dr. Seuss

Born Theodor Geisel, he used the pen name Dr. Seuss, dating back to his college days. Among his most popular titles are How the Grinch Stole Christmas!, The Cat in the Hat, Horton Hears a Who!, and The Lorax, all of which have been adapted into films. Seuss won a special Pulitzer Prize in 1984 for his life’s work.

Dr. Dre

The rap icon, with hits like California Love, Still D.R.E., and Forgot About Dre to his credit, cut his first name, Andre, in half and added the Dr. portion at the front. Today, Dre is still kicking it, with his popular ‘Beats by Dr. Dre’ headphones. His son has followed in his footsteps, adopting the rap nickname Hood Surgeon.

Mixer Mania #1: The Mud Pie

the-mud-pie

  • 1.5 oz Root Beer Schnapps
  • 1 oz Dark Rum
  • 3 oz Hot Chocolate Mix
  • Top with Dr. Pepper
  • Garnish with a Maraschino Cherry

That wraps up the first Mixer Mania. Join us every Monday for 2017, as we delve into the mayhem of 52 different drink mixers. Should be a lot of fun!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
I was really curious to see how hot chocolate mix would pair with a fizzy drink. While the taste was good, mixing the hot chocolate powder and Dr. Pepper created a volcano effect that was hard to turn around and the only way to drink the cocktail was through a straw. Perhaps pre-mixing the hot chocolate, prior to adding the other ingredients would work better, but this looked cool.

April 25 – Gravity Wave

Sit Down, Shut Up

Last week, we looked at the Sip Advisor’s pet peeves on the field of play, committed by athletes. This week, we examine the fouls perpetrated by the fans on the sidelines… your fellow enthusiasts. Heck, one may be sitting next to you as you read this. Let’s get on with the list:

#5: TV Appearance

You know the people that work too hard to get on TV, usually yapping into their cell phone to make sure they’re getting the exposure they want… yeah, these people should be immediately ejected from the stadium and banned for an indeterminate amount of time. For one, they’re not paying attention to the action on the field of play and are more concerned with a brief game cameo. Second, they’re usually obscuring the view of other fans in that seating area. Is that really worth the price of admission?  People holding large signs can be lumped in with this group.

Fans with Signs

#4: Beer Run

I love a beer with my sports (albeit I’m not fond of the price, but whateves), but I certainly refuse to spend more time in concession line-ups than I do watching the contest. Even worse are those people who are constantly getting up and down throughout the game and blocking your view of the action. There must be some sort of cosmic law out there in the universe that says those who will be up and down throughout a game will be seated in the center of an aisle, while those who will be mostly seated will have spots on the aisle, repeatedly disturbed.

#3: Bandwagon Jumpers

If you’re not going to bother following the squad when they need the support the most, then you’re not a true fan. Sure, anyone can get behind a franchise that is loaded with stars and expanding its trophy case, but the true die-hards will be there through thick and thin. You only hope that when someone jumps off the bandwagon, they hurt themselves so seriously that they never get back on. Sadly, the world of fandom doesn’t work this way and the long-time fan suffers most, as ticket prices rise, which can be covered by those who only offer part-time backing.

bandwagon fan

#2: Yelling “Get in the Hole” for Every Shot

The obnoxious fan who started this trend should be drawn and quartered, all the while being pelted by golf balls. All you ever see today is fans shouting “get in the hole” for every single shot of a golf round. It’s particularly absurd on long par-5 tee shots, that have absolutely no chance of being sunk. I guess having some passion on the part of khaki-wearing, sweater vest-adorned golf fans is welcome, but not this way. Unfortunately, Tiger Woods followed this annoying phrase a little too closely and wound up losing his wife, kids, picture perfect image, sponsorship deals, credibility, and so much more.

#1: Leaving a Game Early

This is something I simply refuse to do. I paid good money for my seats and until the final buzzer, my ass will be stuck in said seat. Mrs. Sip and I recently attended a hockey game in Anaheim and were flabbergasted when the arena began emptying out before the shootout was even conducted. While I would NEVER leave a game early, I could at least understand if it was a blowout score, but taking off when things are all knotted up… that’s insanity! Incredulously, fans left the stadium before the Seattle Seahawks miraculous comeback over the Green Bay Packers, to punch their ticket to a second consecutive Super Bowl. Some missed out on the greatest rally the team will ever have.

Super Saturday Shot Day: Gravity Wave

Gravity Wave Shot

  • Rim glass with Caramel Sauce
  • 0.5 oz Irish Crème
  • 0.5 oz Jagermeister
  • 0.5 oz Root Beer Schnapps

I’m also greatly opposed to the wave, which is why I selected the shooter above. What’s worse is when some jackass has a few too many bevvies and tries throughout the entire game to get this crap going. What fan behaviour earns your ire? I’m curious to hear!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I gave this shot to Mrs. Sip (who is a pickier drinker than myself) prior to going out one night and she enjoyed it. I also liked it, but then again, I’m an easier to please audience. My greatest concern in constructing the shooter was how to garnish it. None of the ingredients have an obvious garnish partner, so I went with a Caramel Sauce rim, which pulled the whole thing together!

September 20 – Jager Barrel

Rush Week

With the upcoming DVD release of the movie Neighbors, I thought that this was as good a time as any to take a look at some of the best fraternities out there. Never a fan of the whole Greek system, I prefer my frats on the fictional side. Will the Delta Psi’s in Neighbors ever measure up? Time will only tell!

#5: Alpha Alpha – Undergrads

Rocko Gambiani is not very popular among his brothers, as they are more into the philanthropy and networking aspects of the fraternity, while Rocko wants to experience all the stuff these groups are typically associated with: hazing, partying, pranking, womanizing, etc. Rocko wasn’t even supposed to be a member of Alpha Alpha, but is begrudgingly accepted after passing the initiation tasks he places upon himself, upon learning the Alphas don’t do tests anymore.

Rocko Undergrads

#4: Lambda Lambda Lambda – Revenge of the Nerds

The Tri-Lambs were created when a bunch of outsiders needed a place to live and their subsequent feud with the guys of Alpha Beta and the girls of Pi Delta Pi, showed us all that nerds aren’t bad at all. The success of Revenge of the Nerds did nothing for nerd nation in the real world, but did spawn three sequels, a failed TV show, and cancelled remake. Perhaps the group’s greatest legacy was seen in a number of Tri-Lamb fraternities actually being created, with five currently existing in the U.S.

#3: Oozma Kappa – Monsters University

In a similar vein to Revenge of the Nerds, Oozma Kappa is made up of the outcasts who can’t get into the more popular groups. When Sully finds himself kicked out of Roar Omega Roar and Mike never gets in for not being scary enough, they join Oozma Kappa, hoping this unit of unpopular monsters will help them win the annual Scare Games and gain them re-entry into the renowned Scare Program. Once again, we learn that athletic ability isn’t the only trait needed to succeed.

Oozma Kappa

#2: Lambda Epsilon Omega – Old School

The best part about this fraternity, is that it’s open to anyone who wants to pledge. This includes folks who don’t even attend the nearby campus, and perhaps most notably, the geriatric Blue, who sadly passes away during his own birthday celebration, when two women flash the old timer. What a way to go! In typical fraternity challenge style, the boys need to complete a number of trials to keep their chapter open, while staying clear of the nefarious Dean of the school.

#1: Delta Tau Chi – Animal House

This film made being on double secret probation popular and also brought the toga party into the mainstream. John Belushi is an absolute stud in this film, stealing the show as the drunken troublemaker, John ‘Bluto’ Blutarsky, who we learn during the epilogue to the film, became a U.S. Senator, despite a GPA of 0.0. Animal House is actually one of the highest grossing films of all-time, thanks to its miniscule $2.8 million budget and worldwide success. Sadly, a TV spinoff only lasted 13 episodes.

Super Saturday Shot Day: Jager Barrel

Jager Barrel Shot

  • 1 oz Jagermeister
  • 0.5 oz Root Beer Schnapps
  • Garnish with a Lemon Wedge

It’s funny how many stories are about a ragtag group coming together to make their own fraternity succeed against the established houses. Even on Futurama, Bender takes the fledgling Robot House (aka Epsilon Rho Rho) and wages war against the members of SNΘΘΤΥ House. There’s also a really clever frat name in an episode of Boy Meets World. The group is called Magnum Pi, which is a wonderful homage to my boy Magnum P.I.!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
When you’re honouring the world of fraternities, Jagermeister has to be used in your shooter. This recipe originally comes from a cocktail that is supposed to use Root Beer as a mixer, so I shrunk it down to shot form and added Root Beer Schnapps, instead. It tasted quite nice, as anything with Root Beer does, in this Sip Advisor’s opinion!

March 8 – Pop Quiz

Learning Curve

While I’m happy to be done with school (although it may one day pull me back, kicking and screaming), there are a number of fictional institutes of learning that I haven’t minded attending on a weekly basis. Here are the top five schools of fine learning:

#5: Bayside High School – Saved by the Bell

It seems like the inmates run the asylum at Bayside. Mr. Belding can easily be wrapped around anyone’s finger and the collection of oddball teachers seem to have more fun making friends with their pupils than actually teaching them. Need a break from the stresses of teenage life? Why not hit up The Max for a bite to eat and a respite from the classroom. Upon graduation, you’d could even follow the gang to California University for some post-secondary tutelage.

SBTB

It truly was a perfect world!

#4: Acme Looniversity – Tiny Toon Adventures

I can only imagine the sheer joy (and pain) I’d experience while being taught by my idols; Wile E. Coyote, Sylvester J. Cat, and Yosemite Sam. The course catalogue would be interesting to scan through and might include classes like “Navigating Acme Products”, “Treating Exploding Cigar Injuries” and “Dressing in Drag to Confuse Enemies”. Remember, the teaching staff’s been getting laughs since 1933!

#3: Third Street School – Recess

This school will take you back to your earliest days of learning. To a time of first friends, crushes, and recesses. Recess depicted a time in life when kids don’t have many cares and can just be kids. The only thing to keep in mind is what you’re going to do at break time. Are you going to join an intense game of All the Balls? Perhaps you’ll hit Old Rusty, the jungle gym, for a few good slides. Just pray that you’re not stuck inside on a rain day or suffering through a dreaded detention sentence.

Recess

#2: Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters

Also known as Xavier Institute for Higher Learning, the only pre-requisite you’d have to figure out before attending would be finding your super power. I don’t think fending off hangovers is a talent suitable for a mutant academy, so I’m at a loss for what I could bring to the table. Still, a staff that includes a dude that shoots lasers from his eyes, a woman that can harness the power of weather, and a couple that can read your mind, would make classes very interesting.

#1: Greendale Community College – Community

This would be a truly epic school to attend, so long as every day featured one of the educational institute’s wacky competitions or other shenanigans. From paintball wars to the floor is lava games, each day would bring many unique opportunities. The faculty is a whole other level of insanity from Dean Craig Pelton to instructors such as Señor Ben Chang. Attending Greendale would certainly make your life more exciting, even if your degree wasn’t worth much in the real world.

Super Saturday Shot Day: Pop Quiz (A Sip Advisor Original Recipe)

Pop Quiz Shooter

  • Rim glass with Pop Rocks
  • 0.5 oz Root Beer Schnapps
  • 0.5 oz Bubble Gum Vodka
  • Splash of Lemonade

There are so many other institutions of learning that could have made this list, from Springfield Elementary (The Simpsons) to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry (Harry Potter) and everything in between. Mrs. Sip would probably have loved to attend Breaker High, the school aboard a world-travelling cruise ship (not to mention Ryan Gosling would be a fellow student), while I could see myself excelling at Shiroiwa Junior High School, being shipped off to outlast my classmates Battle Royale style!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
I had higher hopes for this original recipe (seven herbs and spices, of course!). It wasn’t bad, but it could have been better. When I think about it, Root Beer Schnapps and Bubble Gum Vodka have similar aftertastes and perhaps the two got lost in each other. Maybe a Bubble Gum Liqueur would have worked better than the Vodka version, but I don’t think that product exists yet.

March 21 – Bottle Cap

Penny Candy Perfection

I’m sure everyone can remember back to his or her childhood – liquor-decimated brain cells be damned – to the days when a trip to the local convenience store with your allowance money was special. Well, maybe this doesn’t apply to kids nowadays who seem to be ushered around everywhere and are never let out of sight of their helicopter parents. Do they even know the rush and reward of walking to get candy, blowing your allowance all in one place and finding that perfect treat for the walk home? Probably not, but that doesn’t mean us kidults can’t reminisce. Here were some of my favourites:

Double Bubble

I remember the odd time when the Sip Household would have one of those big tubs of Double Bubble chewing gum. Once, I had so many back-to-back pieces of the gum – hell, we were making gum sandwiches and burritos with the stuff – that I got a massive headache from all the chewing. This was the first of many brain injuries (as I’m sure you can tell) and led to a placement on the injured reserve list for months. Yeah, that last joke was about as funny as the comics they packaged with the gum!

Swallowing Gum - The Horrific Outcome!

Shockers

God bless the Wonka candy company (makers of Nerds, Runts, Gobstoppers, etc.), which capitalized on the popularity of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (book and movie). Shockers can certainly be credited for every cavity that has ever been filled in my mouth. These extremely sour, but fun to chew candies never lasted long around The Sip Advisor headquarters. Each of the five Shockers flavours – sour green apple, blue raspberry, grape, orange and cherry – tasted great, which often can’t be said for candy packs. There’s usually one slacker flavour that doesn’t pull its own weight, but not with this treat.

Pixy Stix

Man, kids are stupid. I remember acting like Pixy Stix were some kind of drug. Myself and friends would shoot a bunch of sticks before a hockey game and we were probably sugar buzzing so high that we’d come out, have a couple good shifts, and then crash hard. If the small “snack size” sugar packets weren’t enough, you had to upgrade your dose to those massive two-foot long tubes and before you knew it, you were a junkie.

Pixy Stix Billboard

Jelly Tots

When I decided to put together a candy table for my wedding last summer, I started to gather some favourite treats from past and present. When I found a package of Jelly Tots, I was instantly reminded of how much I enjoyed them in my youth. It had been a while since I’d had any, my need for candy replaced by liquor desires in my teens. The candy table was a hit, a highlight of the wedding, I dare say. Well, it was largely demolished by the time I and the rest of the wedding party returned from our photo excursion. I still managed to get some Jelly Tots, though!

Bottle Caps

What today’s drink is all about! The only thing that sucks about Bottle Caps candy are the grape-flavoured ones, which taste worse than most cough medicines. And it always seems like there are a disproportionate amount of those terrible death-tasting grape candies in each box. Give me more of the Cherry, Root Beer, Orange Crush and Cola pieces and sub out the grape candies for a lemon-lime soda tablet. Hell, throw in a Red Bull flavor… anything but yucky grape.

Drink #80: Bottle Cap

Bottle Cap Cocktail

  • 1 oz Root Beer Schnapps
  • 1 oz Raspberry Liqueur
  • Splash of Sweet & Sour Mix
  • Top with Cola
  • Garnish with Sour Soother

Thankfully, I still get a weekly stipend from Mrs. Sip, specifically for penny candy. It was part of our prenuptial agreement and I’m thankful every day that I had that written in. You can’t see me!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
This drink tastes exactly like a Bottle Cap candy. It’s not very heavy on liquor, which can sometimes be a nice change of pace. I wish I could have garnished the drink with an actual Bottle Cap, but it was made impromptu, so I settled for a yummy Sour Soother. C’est la vie!