Flavour Revolution – Peppermint

Stripped and Striped

Candy canes are one of many infamously striped items we enjoy in our daily life. Here are some of the other striped wonders the world has brought us:

Referees

Love them or hate them – and really, only a mother could love them – referees are a necessary element to most sports (albeit completely useless in baseball where computers can better detect balls and strikes). I have a theory that refs dress like zebras so fans can easily identify exactly where to direct their venomous hatred, when they feel their team has been wronged.

ref screws team

Sports Jerseys

Many teams out there on the sports landscape feature some kind of striping in their choice of jersey colours. Perhaps the most famous squad to don stripes (or in this case, pinstripes), is the New York Yankees. An urban legend exists that the Yankees adopted the pinstripe look to make portly star Babe Ruth look slimmer, but in actuality, the style was already used well before Ruth joined the franchise.

Clothes

Of course, the clothing industry is an obvious choice for striped items and some of the most iconic characters in pop culture have been known to wear these materials. Ronald McDonald sports striped socks. Similarly, two sociopaths, Dennis the Menace and Freddy Krueger, traditionally rock striped shirts. Some people think stripes don’t look good on them, while others don the look regularly.

Animals

The animal kingdom is full of creatures with stripes, including zebras, bumble bees, Bengal tigers, fish, raccoons, and even skunks. Therefore, Pepe Le Pew, Nemo, and Rocket Raccoon are among some of the popular characters that have streaks. And don’t forget that poor little kitty that always manages to accidentally gain stripes and become a target for Pepe Le Pew’s unwanted advances.

skunks as cats

Candy Stripers

I had to be careful not to type candy “strippers”, which is far more appealing than a trip to the hospital! Candy Stripers are often hospital volunteers, decked out in red and white striped uniforms. The whole concept originated in East Orange, New Jersey, all the way back in 1944, when a high school civics class project designed the uniforms to be used at the East Orange General Hospital.

Watermelons

My favourite fruit has a distinct striped pattern on its outer shell, which can be a telltale sign as to whether the melon is ripe, so long as the area between the stripes is light green. As beautiful as a watermelon looks on the outside, what we really care about is the delicious fruit inside. Watermelons should be a symbol of harmony and acceptance, because it’s what’s on the inside that counts.

Crosswalks

We use them every day – not that some drivers seem to really care or notice – to “safely” moved about the world. The most famous sidewalk in existence is likely the one The Beatles crossed on their Abbey Road album cover. Since its release, thousands of Beatle-files have tried to recreate the scene, including the Sip Family… and we looked pretty good doing it.

zebra-crosswalk

Billiards Balls

Solids versus stripes… like gang warfare, that’s what the game of billiards really comes down to. The first player to sink a ball (whether it be a solid 1-7 or a striped 9-15), then works the rest of the contest to eliminate the other balls that match the ball they originally pocketed. At times, I’ve been a decent pool player, but I’m no master of the parlor game. I’ll definitely never be a pool hall hustler!

Barber Poles

Back in the day, these red, white, and blue striped poles were essential in identifying locations where one could get their hair cut… that and the many customers emerging from the shops with fresh dos. Today, the barber pole is a thing of the past. I personally blame the Barber Shop movie franchise, but that might be reaching a little.

Jail Uniforms

Up until orange jumpsuits (Orange is the New Black, after all) became the norm, we associated black and white striped clothing with criminals. This is because the uniforms were a “badge of shame” and were only changed when rehabilitation of prisoners began to be favoured over punishment. That said, to this day, if you want to dress up as a jailbird for Halloween, a black and white striped costume will do.

inmate_apparel

Flags

Most national banners out there feature a striped pattern of sorts. Most notably perhaps, is the American flag, which is iconic for its 50 stars – each representing a state within the union – and also its red and white alternating stripes. Many other countries flags are comprised of stripes, such as the United Kingdom, Greece, Cuba, Uruguay, Costa Rica, and others.

Circus Tents

After American Horror Story: Freakshow, I can’t look at circus tents the same anymore, but striping is a traditional feature of the big top venues. When the Cirque du Soleil tour comes to the city each year, everyone knows its location thanks to the colourful tent that pops up in downtown Vancouver. It also helps that it’s located in the same spot annually, but the tent definitely draws attention.

Flavour Revolution: Crème de Candy Cane

  • 1.5 oz Burnett’s Candy Cane Vodka
  • 1 oz Crème de Cacao
  • Top with Milk
  • Splash of Lemon-Lime Soda
  • Dash of Grenadine
  • Garnish with a Candy Cane

Really, a striped pattern could be featured on absolutely anything. As for entries with “stripe” in their name, there’s the rock band The White Stripes and the Jamaican lager Red Stripe. Lastly, the main baddie in Gremlins is also named Stripe, thanks to his tuft of white hair.

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July 26 – Red Devil

Gingerbread Men

Well, apparently ‘Kick a Ginger Day’ just recently passed, but not being an observer of the holiday, I’d like to turn things in another direction and embrace our pale, freckled friends. Hell, some of them are pretty hot, as we’ll see in next week’s look at ginger females. Today, though, we breakdown the Top 5 ginger dudes… no kicking allowed!

#5: Richie Cunningham – Happy Days

While he may look like the biggest dork, Richie Cunningham is seemingly quite popular, with a group of loyal buddies, girls willing to date him, and particularly the Fonz even wanting (or willing) to be his pal. I guess the 50’s were truly a different time. Ron Howard is a Hollywood icon and is perhaps the most successful child actor of all-time. Whether he’s directing hit movies, returning to Mayberry, or narrating Arrested Development, this ginger has done it all and done it well.

Richie Cunningham

#4: Carrot Top

I urge anyone heading to Las Vegas to check out Carrot Top’s show at The Luxor. Even if you despise prop comedy (and there are certainly detractors of the art form), there’s something about Carrot Top’s energy and creativity that will leave you satisfied and exhausted from laughing. His manic delivery keeps the show running at super speeds and before you know it, the show is over and you’re wanting more redhead comedy.

#3: Ronald McDonald

While ‘Rotten Ronny’ here doesn’t do much for the ginger image – you know, looking all creepy and such – he is a global icon and one that most people identify with joyful childhood memories of Happy Meals, ball pits, and McDonalds birthday parties! While Grimace and the gang have faded into obscurity, Ronald is still a mascot and spokesperson for the brand. For better or worse, we may never bid farewell to the clown prince of hamburgers.

Ronald McDonald Joker

#2: Beaker – The Muppets

Poor Beaker has been suffering through ‘Kick a Ginger Day’ his entire life. Often the victim of Professor Bunsen Honeydew’s madcap inventions, this little lab assistant must absolutely hate going into work each day. Even though he’s a puppet, Beaker managed to appear during a professional wrestling match and help fellow ginger Sheamus pick up a victory thanks to a potion he whipped up. Now that’s some sweet redhead revenge!

#1: Philip J. Fry – Futurama

He may not be the brightest guy out there, but neither am I, so I feel Fry and I share some sort of bond… Brothers in Idiocy or something to that tune. Mrs. Sip and I have been going through all the Futurama episodes lately and it’s really made me appreciate the characters more than I did before. While we haven’t finished the series yet, I hope Fry has a happy ending (and not the naughty kind)… I know this fellow idiot got his!

Super Saturday Shot Day: Red Devil

Red Devil Shot

  • 0.5 oz Vodka (I used Loopy)
  • 0.5 oz Amaretto
  • 0.5 oz Cranberry Juice
  • Garnish with Cranberries

In closing, I have to give a shout out to my little buddy Furious B, a long-haired orange tabby. Wishing you many more adventures, vermin kills, and countless hours napping the day away!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I wanted to make sure the ‘Red’ title was a part of each recipe for these articles… mission accomplished (so far)! The Loopy Vodka (gifted to the Sip Advisor from Cousin Sip) was a nice touch with the Amaretto and I actually squeezed my own Cranberry Juice, which is not as easy to do as one would think. Luckily, I didn’t need much of it for a shooter.

February 26 – Life’s A Peach

Rough Starts

Sure it’s February and the weather may not be at its best in your neck of the woods. Maybe you’ve caught a winter flu or cold bug (like Mrs. Sip passed along to your friendly neighbourhood liquor slinger). But hey, things could be worse. You could be one of these people, having a not-so-peachy start to 2013:

Lance Armstrong

Lancelot finally revealed what made him so “Livestrong” en route to winning seven Tour de France titles. With his image tarnished, all the good he ever did for cancer research and being an inspiration to cancer victims and their families has been tossed out the window along with his legacy in cycling. At least he hooked up with Cheryl Crow… that you can never take away from the man.

Nike Slogan

Oscar Pistorius

The ‘Blade Runner’ went from hero to zero in South Africa (and around the world) when he killed his girlfriend, model Reeva Steenkamp. Pistorius shot Steenkamp four times, claiming he mistook her for a robber. Guess when you hear someone burgling your precious toiletries it’s better to shoot four times through the locked bathroom door first and let the jury ponder questions of self-defence later. The only person involved in the case with perhaps an even less peachy time of it than Pistorius is the chief investigating officer, Hilton Botha, who managed to botch most of the initial investigation. But hey, it’s really hard to get your investigation details right when your mind is probably on your own upcoming charge of attempted murder, right Mr. Botha?

National Rifle Association

Speaking of gun violence, with all the recent incidents in the United States, the NRA is really under fire. How the NRA continues to push their pro-weapon message, in spite of all the school shootings, mall massacres, and other tragedies is beyond this simple Canadian boy. It’s sad that it seems there needs to be even more unnecessary killings in order to finally get the message across. Then again, if the past is any indication, the NRA isn’t listening to any messages that don’t call for principals, babysitteres, and girl scouts to start carrying guns. Whoa, a completely serious Sip Advisor. I must apologize for that, readers. It won’t happen again.

Subway

The hoagie haven has been busted for serving 11-inch sandwiches instead of the advertised 12-inches. How many more 12-inch sandwiches could have been made with the inch that was missing from every sandwich Subway has sold over the years? That’s an extra bite or two of glorious sandwich goodness and I for one am outraged!!! Apparently, I’m not alone, as there are several pending lawsuits against the chain. It’s hard to believe people would actually file suit over this. Can they claim extreme mental anguish because of the missing inch? Does an extra inch really make the difference (Mrs. Sip says it does). I personally think all the litigants should get paid out in coupons for one-inch subs. There, problem solved!

Subway Sandwich

Victims of Russian Meteorite

Videos of this event have been astonishing viewers for weeks now. The crappiest part, aside from the more than 1,000 injuries, was the sonic boom that shattered so many windows in the area. Daytime temperatures in this part of Russia were only as high as -12-degrees Celsius, so you can assume that a lot of Russkies were freezing their asses off waiting for their insolation from the harsh climate to be restored. At least they have vodka and while it’s been proven to not actually heat a body, it’ll get ya drunk and make it easy for you to fall asleep, regardless of temperature. (Warning: passing out in extreme temperatures may cause frost bite, death, or your buddy to draw fallic symbols on your face).

Woman with Deadly Vagina

An unidentified Brazilian (the place, not the wax job) has been caught trying to kill her husband by putting a poisonous substance on her hoo-ha and demanding her husband pleasure her orally. Given she had recently asked for a divorce, that should have been his first clue to get the fuck outta Dodge. Lucky for our lethario, he has some bloodhound in him and smelled something fishy… and then he smelled something poisonous (*rimshot*).

To top it all off, the woman is being sued by her estranged husband… that’s right, sued… not criminally prosecuted, although sources say that is still a possibility. And we all thought Brazilian fart porn would be the country’s worst export in the sex department. Now we could see a rash of poison vagina murder copycat plots…

Poison Woman

Pope Benedict XVI

Shouldn’t the pope be saying that prayer and faith will heal him and help him continue to lead the church? His stepping down due to age and illness (the first pope to resign since Gregory XII in 1415) shows that his election was totally the wrong choice (although he was given 7-1 odds to take the job… do people gamble on the papacy nowadays?). Personally I think the Catholic Church should just select someone young and sexy in its next conclave. Is Justin Bieber available?

2012 Doomsdayers

The fact that we’re all (well, most of us are) still here in 2013 is enough to drive an apocalypse theorist nuts (if they’re not already there). It won’t be long before another theory emerges and these crackpots get back to building their bomb shelters and stocking supplies for the “end of days.” I happen to think that I’d thrive in a post-apocalyptic world. Liquor would be in high demand and if you search my home, that seems to be all I’ve hoarded for emergency purposes!

Drink #57: Life’s A Peach

Life's a Peach Drink

  • 1 oz Vodka (I used Pinnacle Strawberry-Kiwi)
  • 1 oz Peach Schnapps
  • Top with Lemonade
  • Garnish with a real Peach Wedge and a Fuzzy Peach candy

Yes, 2013 has been rough so far for the folks listed above. And to think, we’re only two months deep into the calendar. People still have another 10 months to completely mess up their year and everyone else’s. Never fear, though, my little sippers, I’ll always be here to make things better!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
I wasn’t entirely impressed with this cocktail. The Strawberry-Kiwi Vodka disappointed and didn’t blend well with the Peach Schnapps. With the drink done, I went to eat the Peach Wedge and realized, I don’t care much for peaches!