August 23 – Death Shot

Get the Tissues

There are some incredibly sad scenes in movies meant for children. Many of these incidents stick with kids, as they did with myself, and require some serious psychological therapy in adulthood. This is going to be a tough article to get through, so make sure you have a drink in one hand and a box of tissues in the other. Here are the Top 5 saddest scenes in kid’s movies:

#5: Rufio – Hook

The leader of the Lost Boys in Peter Pan’s absence, Rufio takes the longest time to accept Peter back into fold, even while other members of the group welcome their long lost front man. Rufio’s death is so shocking because of his young age and childhood exuberance. Not to mention, he and Peter had finally become friends-on again and Rufio is shot point blank by Captain Hook during a climactic battle scene featuring a number of humorous Lost Boys tactics. In a realm where death doesn’t seem to occur, Rufio’s tragic killing snaps viewers back into the real world. We all hoped Rufio would be bangaranging forever, but sadly, that wasn’t meant to be.

#4: Ellie Fredricksen – Up

I’m a huge Disney backer (mainly for the theme parks, although the movies are a’ight too), but man do they love killing off women. Perhaps they are closet misogynists or something. Mrs. Sip and I recently attended an orchestral performance of Pixar film songs and they played the entire opening to Up, complete with video… I don’t think there was a dry eye in the audience. The one thing that cushions the death in this movie is that Ellie lived her adventure and despite her sad passing, wasn’t cut down in her prime like some of the others on this list. It would have been nice, though, if the Fredricksen’s had been able to take that trip to Paradise Falls together.

#3: Optimus Prime – Transformers: The Movie

It’s hard to make a robot’s death matter, but they nailed it in this film. The saddest part about Optimus Prime’s passing is how his team of Autobots react, breaking down in grief from the crushing blow of their leader’s demise. Prime goes out with one of the greatest death bed speeches ever delivered, imploring his Autobots to continue fighting the good fight, while assuring Ultra Magnus that he can be the next leader of the crew. There are, in fact, a number of Transformer deaths in this movie and even more were supposed to occur, but were cut from the film. The losses largely took place to set up a new toy line for the franchise.

#2: Mufasa – Lion King

This is a rare case of Disney killing off a father instead of a mother. In Hamlet-esque style, Mufasa’s broski Scar engineers the death of the king and makes the young prince Simba believe he is to blame (and he kind of is). It’s heart wrenching to watch Simba nuzzle up to his dying dad before going on the run at Scar’s instruction. Simba, of course, grows into a fully-grown lion and with his father speaking to him from beyond the grave, returns to the Pridelands to battle his uncle for his rightful place on the throne… a game of thrones, if you will!

#1: Littlefoot’s Mom – Land Before Time

While the direct-to-video sequels took a much lighter tone, focusing on sing-a-long songs, the original film was gripping with its drama and tragedy. Littlefoot’s mom suffers mortal wounds at the hands and teeth of a ‘Sharptooth’ (aka the original King of the Jungle, the Tyrannosaurus Rex), while protecting her young son from harm. It’s so very sad seeing Littlefoot try to wake up his fallen mother, who can only muster some advice for her kin before dying. Littlefoot is now separated from his herd, as a result of the whole scene, and only the guidance of his mother’s voice can lead him back to safety with his clan.

Super Saturday Shot Day: Death Shot

Death Shot

  • 0.5 oz Tequila
  • 0.5 oz Sambuca
  • Garnish with a Raspberry

Honourable mentions to Old Yeller, Bambi’s mom, and Macaulay Culkin’s character in My Girl. Have I missed anything? What’s your pick for saddest scene in a children’s flick? After reliving all of these moments, it’s really no wonder that the Sip Advisor had anxiety issues regarding death as a little sipper. Perhaps a little more liquid therapy will be needed!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2.5 Sips out of 5):
This shooter was exactly what I thought it would be: punishing. I can’t say it tasted bad, but it was strong and I wouldn’t recommend it for those faint of heart… just like these films. The crushed Raspberry was a nice touch for garnish, given the article’s theme and the potent libation. Despite the two clear liquors, I purposely edited the shot to look dark for the finishing touch on this post.

Advertisements

October 17 – Wicked Witch of the East

Musical Mayhem

Today we look at my favourite musicals I’ve been dragged along, kicking and screaming, to see. What do musicals have to do with alcohol, you might be asking? Well, whenever Mrs. Sip wants to go to one, she usually plies me with booze to get me in the mood. It’s a similar process to serving chocolate fondue to your better half when you want them to play video games with you. What’s that? Us dudes are supposed to use this tactic for other benefits… oh my, how very wrong I’ve been!

Avenue Q

The way I always describe this show is “Sesame Street gone badass”. The musical features scenes of gratuitous puppet sex, while also including songs like “Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist” and “The Internet Is For Porn”. I actually introduced Mrs. Sip to Avenue Q, suggesting we see it in London’s West End after I saw an ad. She wasn’t onboard until learning that it had actually won a number of Tony awards, including Best Musical (2004), beating out Wicked, the show Mrs. Sip wanted to see. The show didn’t disappoint in it’s larger London venue or when I recently saw it again in a smaller venue at Vancouver’s Granville Island Theatre.

Avenue Q

Book of Morman

Mrs. Sip and I were lucky to see this amazing show during another trip to London recently. It’s the hottest show right now and tickets are hard to come by. We ordered months in advance… and then blanked on the date of our performance and missed it. They hold a lottery before every show to sell 21 tickets in the front row. Mrs. Sip and I entered and were fortunate to have our entry drawn! The show was produced by the creators of South Park, who have absolutely no problem lampooning everything under the sun from religion to race and Book of Mormon is no exception.

Rock of Ages

If you love 80’s rock from all the best hair bands, then this show is for you. The energy is fantastic, the music is rocking and there are a lot of laughs to be had, as the era is spoofed. Of course, the plot centers around a small town girl and a city boy coming together in Los Angeles, as they both reach for the heights of stardom. This is the first musical I’ve been to where they actually sell drinks routinely throughout the performance.

Jersey Boys

When you leave this musical, all you want to do is download some Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons tunes and go back in time to another era. I surprised Mrs. Sip with tickets to this show as a wedding shower gift… well, after Ma Sip forgot to pass the present along to her, on my behalf. The production, which we saw at Vancouver’s Queen Elizabeth Theatre, received an immediate standing ovation as it ended, not one of those “well, most people are standing, so I guess I’ll stand too” types of deals. Oh, what a night!

jersey-boys

Lion King

Hakuna Matata… what a wonderful phrase! Mrs. Sip and I saw the Lion King in Las Vegas and it was an enjoyable show. While I personally found that the movie is better, the musical tried to separate itself a little from its source material with a few songs that aren’t in the film and the costumes were out of this world. Perhaps best of all, is it was combined with a free buffet dinner at the Mandalay Bay resort.

Singin’ in the Rain

This is the first musical I ever took Mrs. Sip to as part of a dating anniversary gift. I suppose I set myself up for future trips to the theatre with that gesture, but I guess it’s all worth it. The best part of this show was when they flooded the stage during the titular number. Then, throughout intermission, as they worked diligently to dry the stage, I worked just as hard to make sure my stage was getting wet at the bar!

Singin' in the Rain

Aladdin

In its 10th year at the Hyperion Theatre at Disneyland’s California Adventure park, Mrs. Sip and I have watched the production a handful of times throughout our visits and have always enjoyed ourselves. The Genie sometimes updates his jokes, so it’s never the same show. Full of acrobats, big theatrical numbers, and even an elephant and a flying carpet, this mini musical never disappointing! Plus, since you’re already inside the park, the musical is free and you can bring a Churro in with you for snacking!

Wicked

Perhaps my favoruite element of going to a musical is the use of staging and how it is quickly changed in the course of a performance. This show had perhaps the best stage work I’ve ever seen and I can totally understand why it’s a hit production. The story of how the Wicked Witch became her wicket self is an interesting twist on the Wizard of Oz franchise, which is full of other possible origin tales.

Drink #290: Wicked Witch of the East

Wicked Witch of the East Drink Recipe

  • 1 oz Melon Liqueur
  • 1 oz Vodka
  • 0.5 oz Blue Curacao
  • Dash of Grenadine
  • Garnish with a Broomstick

Have any suggestions of shows I should check out in the future? I’m willing to try anything once, but if you send me down the wrong path, I’ll take away your little sipper membership and secret decoder.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
Okay, so I’ve pushed this cocktail back a number of times and Halloween seemed like the perfect time to finally get it done. It’s supposed to be layered, with the Melon Liqueur and Vodka mixed together and poured on top of the combined Blue Curacao and Grenadine, but although that didn’t work out, the blend of black with hints of green around the edges I felt looked neat enough. And the Broomstick garnish… I made that myself. I know, who would have thunk the Sip Advisor had some arts and crafts talent!

September 1 – Kir Royale

Your Majesty

There have been many fictional monarchs over the course of history. Some rulers are worthy of mention, while others have had subpar reigns. Here are some of the most liked and most hated to take the throne:

Joffrey Baratheon

As I’ve written before, I can’t wait to see this little brat get his comeuppance. It will happen and the only question is who will deliver that sweet blow? Will it be Tyrion Lannister, who has struggled to rein in Joffrey’s psychopathic behavior? Will it be Daenerys Targaryen, who is building an army to reclaim her family’s rightful place of power? My money is on Arya Stark, who only has sweet revenge on her mind. It will probably be someone we never expected, however. And if you are one of those self righteous people who has some inside knowledge because you’ve “read the book” (cough, cough, Mrs. Sip), don’t tell me a damn thing!

Joffrey

Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler

Jerry Lawler earned his crown in the Memphis wrestling territory and went on to hold that region’s championship countless times… it probably helped that he was usually an owner of the promotion. World Wrestling Entertainment used to also host an annual King of the Ring tournament, which was won by such dignitaries as Randy Savage (with Queen Sherri Martel), Steve Austin, and Brock Lesnar.

Queen of Hearts

Off with their heads! Poor Alice, stuck in Wonderland and having the most bizarre time ever… she goes from a quiet game of croquet to running for her life, while some mad queen wants her head served up by the executioner. And they call croquet a gentleman’s game (I don’t know that for fact, if you haven’t already noticed by now I just make stuff up as I go along). Luckily, Alice escape with her skull still attached to her body, but will she ever be the same?

Kingdom of Eternia

Most people are probably asking: what the hell is this. Well friends, this kingdom would consist of King Randor, Queen Marlena, Prince Adam, and Princess Adora. The last two are otherwise known as He-Man and She-Ra. Together, they were part of one of the greatest marketing concepts ever: combining action figures with cartoons and comics. I only wish I had come up with this billion-dollar idea.

He-Man & She-Ra

Evil Queen

There are few queens that are as wicked as the Evil Queen. She actually enlisted a huntsman to track down Snow White, the fairest of them all, kill her and bring back her heart as proof of the assassination. Her maliciousness has only been heightened on Once Upon a Time where she continues her battles with Snow White, Prince Charming, and all the other characters of Disney fantasy.

Burger King

I wish that I was king of burgers… I’m sure this would come with an endless supply of the meals from all parts of the world. You could probably summon a burger whenever you wanted one. Then, all you’d have to do is become buddies with the Fry King and Milkshake King and you’d have the full meal deal! As long as I didn’t have to look as creepy as the Burger King mascot, I’d be fine with the challenges and responsibilities of such a title.

Simba

Of course I had to have a kitty entry into this category. King of the Pride Lands, Simba has a rough go of things when he is led to believe that his actions caused his father Mufasa’s death. Thankfully, he meets Timon and Pumbaa, who restore his confidence. He also bangs his childhood sweetie, Nala, and then returns home to battle his uncle Scar over his right to the throne. Upon victory, he literally becomes the Lion King, although I have a feeling other kitties would challenge his claims.

Drink #244: Kir Royale

Kir Royal Drink Recipe

I think I’d be a good king, similar to how I preside over all you little sippers. I would make sure that my constituents are provided for in all realms of the booze world, including liquor, mixers, garnishes, and even drunken snackies like chips and pulled pork. If we really want to make this happen, let’s start a revolution tomorrow. Are you in!?

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
Mrs. Sip really liked this mix and she seemed to stumble upon the perfect fix for wines and champagnes that are a little too sweet. As for myself, I enjoyed the cocktail. The Blackcurrant Liqueur is a unique spirit and the Cherry garnish looked awesome!

March 30 – Vegas Blowjob

Entertain Me

Well, today we celebrate The Sip Legacy’s (that would be Mrs. Sip and I as a conglomerate) 11-year dating anniversary and it is purely coincidence that this shot was chosen for this momentous occasion. You think she’ll get the hint, fellas? *wink, wink*

This is the second year in a row that we’ve celebrated with a trip to Las Vegas. We love Sin City and we’re not even gamblers. I actually can’t remember the last time I put any money on the line during a stay here. Sure, it’s happened and I had one moderately successful night with video poker, but our main intention when coming to the city is to eat, drink, and be merry. To fulfill the merry portion of that mantra, we love going to shows along the strip. Here are some of our favourites:

Penn & Teller – Rio

These guys do it all, combining magic, comedy, drama, the whole shebang. When we attended this show, Mrs. Sip was wearing a low cut halter top and when the guys were looking for a volunteer for their knife act, I knew they’d pick her (despite her laughable efforts to look anywhere but at the guys). Sure enough they did and because of her participation we were able to get a front-of-the-line chance to meet with Penn and Teller after the show. Teller even spoke, which blew my mind, thanking Mrs. Sip and saying she did a great job!

Penn & Teller

Cirque du Soleil: Ka – MGM Grand

We are huge fans of the Cirque du Soleil shows in Vegas, as well as the ones that tour around the world. This martial arts-themed extravaganza, with its giant, rotating and moving stage, was completely mesmerizing particularly the climax of the show, where performers were running on giant spinning wheels and pulling off different tricks.

Cirque du Soleil: Love – Mirage

Keeping with the Cirque theme, what do you get when you take the amazing circus acts the troupe is known for and set the entire spectacle to the remarkable Beatles music catalogue? You have a surefire hit, that’s what. The soundtrack to this show is amazing, as are most Cirque soundtracks, but the reworking, mash-ups and brilliant original work of the group is particularly memorable.

Cirque Love

Cirque du Soleil: O – Belagio

Let’s discuss one more Cirque show while we’re at it. I’m a born swimmer and I love seeing high dives and crazy feats performed in water. The Cirque folk put a lot of work into their stage design and it pays off for this performance, as the stage can turn into a pool in no time, allowing for the performers to go from dancers to divers seamlessly.

Carrot Top – Luxor

I love Carrot Top’s energy and his frantic style. At the show we attended, he even passed out shots of Crown Royal to some lucky audience members, which made me respect the guy even more. Unfortunately he couldn’t hear a drunk Sip Advisor yelling, “I’m from Canada… I love Crown!” He even made a good impression on Mrs. Sip, who was hesitant at first to make this our show for the trip.

Carrot Top

There are other shows I would recommend, including Lion King (Mandalay Bay), and Jersey Boys (Planet Hollywood, although we saw it on tour in Vancouver). If they still were being performed on the strip, I’d also endorse Cirque du Soleil: Viva Elvis (Aria) and comedian Frank Caliendo (Monte Carlo).

After numerous trips to the city together, there’s still so much more we would like to see: Cirque du Soleil: Zumanity at New York, New York, Louie Anderson at The Excalibur, The Blue Man Group at Monte Carlo, and the list continues to grow with each visit.

Drink #89: Vegas Blowjob

Vegas Blowjob Shooter

  • 0.3 oz Banana Liqueur
  • 0.3 oz Spiced Rum
  • 0.3 oz Jagermeister
  • 0.3 oz Orange Juice
  • 0.3 oz Pineapple Juice
  • Garnish with a Condom

Here at Sip Adivsor Headquarters, we endorse safe sex. Just make sure you don’t accidentally ingest the rubber!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
Where to begin with this shot! We added the condom garnish for a little humour, but I think it really completed the drink’s appearance. Plus, it was banana-flavoured, so it actually added a little essence to the shooter.