Flavour Revolution – Watermelon

Seed Money

By far, my favourite fruit is watermelon. That said, the other day, the Sip Advisor picked up a little round watermelon for $3.99. Not per pound, just $3.99, straight up. That’s a pretty good deal. Some of the other price points that will appear on this list… eh, not so much! Here are some of the most expensive fruits of all-time:

Densuke Black Watermelon

Let’s get the ball rolling with some watermelon selections. Apparently, only 100 of these black, non-striped melons are grown each season, with one being sold at auction for $6,100. Sure the behemoth weighed in at a whopping 17 pounds, but I’ll take my $3.99 melon, thank you very much. There are also square watermelons, which blew up the internet a couple years back with their $200 cost.

Cat Watermelon

Lost Gardens of Heligan Pineapples

I would have never thought of England as a breeding ground for pineapples. Tropical countries, sure, but not a nation that is often the butt of weather jokes. Even more shocking is the method used to develop these fruits, which uses straw, manure, and horse urine, classified as “Victorian techniques!” Doesn’t sound very appetizing to me and we haven’t even brought up the $16,000 price tag.

Yubari King Melons

These melons are given as gifts, so I’m wondering who out there wants to get close enough to the Sip Advisor that come my next birthday, you might flip a set of these melons my way. What’s that? You don’t want to spend $12,500 on this purveyor of such pleasure? Well, that just makes me sad.

Life Melons

Strawberries Arnaud

At least in this case you get a bowl of strawberries and not just one, but the price point ($1.4 million) is completely ridiculous… even if it’s garnished with a 4.7 carat diamond ring. I wouldn’t pay that if Mrs. Sip was given the cash and had to personally serve me the berries, while wearing little to no clothing… or maybe I would!

Ruby Roman Grapes

These grapes are each about the size of a ping pong ball, but why does that make them so valuable? At least there are 25 in the bunch, but $6,400 seems excessive. Imagine taking these grapes and playing the most expensive game of beer pong, ever? There would have to be something like fine champagne or luxurious cognac in the cups!

Flavour Revolution: Love Potion #9

Love Potion #9 Martini

  • 1 oz Watermelon Pucker
  • 1 oz Vanilla Vodka
  • Top with Cranberry Juice
  • Splash of Pineapple Juice
  • Garnish with a Watermelon Ball

So, how much would you pay for some of your favourite fruits? As far as watermelon is concerned, it’s almost cheaper for me to settle for the 21st Amendment Hell or High Watermelon or Parallel 49 Seed Spitter beers and call it a day!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
There are other recipes under the same Love Potion #9 name. This martini was very tasty, with hints of vanilla, watermelon, cranberries, and pineapples. It was a fruit salad for the mouth and a perfect recipe for this article… best of all, it didn’t cost an arm and a leg to enjoy!

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April 19 – Mad Fuzzy Melonade

The Pursuit of Pucker

Like Bilbo Baggins running out of his hut and through the shire, I yell, “I’m going on an adventure!”

The difference is, while Bilbo traversed much of Middle Earth and had to contend with orcs, dwarves, elves and other wacky creatures (not to mention singing), all I had to do was walk out dejectedly from a handful of American Walmart stores (although the front door greeters can often resemble Gollem) and set off to the next possible home of the magical elixir I was questing.

women of walmart

These are certainly not the greeters I’m accustomed to…

As much as I like drinks featuring the blue raspberry flavour, my absolute favourite taste is watermelon. I’m a fiend for the fruit, almost eating the rind to get every last morsel of watermelon goodness.

When I first heard of the existence of Watermelon Pucker, I knew that I would one day have to own the nectar, and have since always made a point of checking liquor and other grocery stores hoping to stumble upon my sought after treasure.

Repeatedly, it was not meant to be. The closest I could find in my home province of B.C. was Bols Melon Liqueur. Recently, I’ve also tracked down Midori, but neither of these is really meant to highlight the essence of watermelon.

watermelon-love

Imagine my surprise when Mrs. Sip and I stopped into a store at the Flamingo Hotel in Las Vegas last month and I found the beautiful concoction. As I always do, I headed straight for the liquor display (knocking down fellow customers in my wake) and started checking out the bottles available. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I caught the word “Pucker” on one of the mickeys.

It was only an offering of the cherry-flavoured Pucker, but I felt as if Las Vegas’ lady luck was smiling upon me that day. Behind the cherry bottle were two other Pucker varieties. I threw them off the display, causing the poor store attendant to summon security. And there it was… the last of the three options was my Watermelon Pucker.

Sweet baby Jesus, my long wait and hard effort had paid off. I never lost sight of the light at the end of the tunnel and for that, I was rewarded.

cat-saw-light

As we paid, I kept the bottle tightly pressed to my chest, stroking its smoothness and muttering “my precious.” It finally dawned on me that we were in an erotica store, complete with books on beginner BDSM and other naughty mementos.

Today, I share with you the sweet potion I rescued from an eternity without me. Just don’t let it go to your head!

Drink #109: Mad Fuzzy Melonade

Mad Fuzzy Melonade Cocktail Recipe

Sip Adivsor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
A sweet and sour drink, I enjoyed it despite the fact that it was not a very boozy drink (the Watermelon Pucker is only 15%). The drink tasted similar to a watermelon Jolly Rancher candy, so can’t complain!