April 19 – Mad Fuzzy Melonade

The Pursuit of Pucker

Like Bilbo Baggins running out of his hut and through the shire, I yell, “I’m going on an adventure!”

The difference is, while Bilbo traversed much of Middle Earth and had to contend with orcs, dwarves, elves and other wacky creatures (not to mention singing), all I had to do was walk out dejectedly from a handful of American Walmart stores (although the front door greeters can often resemble Gollem) and set off to the next possible home of the magical elixir I was questing.

women of walmart

These are certainly not the greeters I’m accustomed to…

As much as I like drinks featuring the blue raspberry flavour, my absolute favourite taste is watermelon. I’m a fiend for the fruit, almost eating the rind to get every last morsel of watermelon goodness.

When I first heard of the existence of Watermelon Pucker, I knew that I would one day have to own the nectar, and have since always made a point of checking liquor and other grocery stores hoping to stumble upon my sought after treasure.

Repeatedly, it was not meant to be. The closest I could find in my home province of B.C. was Bols Melon Liqueur. Recently, I’ve also tracked down Midori, but neither of these is really meant to highlight the essence of watermelon.

watermelon-love

Imagine my surprise when Mrs. Sip and I stopped into a store at the Flamingo Hotel in Las Vegas last month and I found the beautiful concoction. As I always do, I headed straight for the liquor display (knocking down fellow customers in my wake) and started checking out the bottles available. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I caught the word “Pucker” on one of the mickeys.

It was only an offering of the cherry-flavoured Pucker, but I felt as if Las Vegas’ lady luck was smiling upon me that day. Behind the cherry bottle were two other Pucker varieties. I threw them off the display, causing the poor store attendant to summon security. And there it was… the last of the three options was my Watermelon Pucker.

Sweet baby Jesus, my long wait and hard effort had paid off. I never lost sight of the light at the end of the tunnel and for that, I was rewarded.

cat-saw-light

As we paid, I kept the bottle tightly pressed to my chest, stroking its smoothness and muttering “my precious.” It finally dawned on me that we were in an erotica store, complete with books on beginner BDSM and other naughty mementos.

Today, I share with you the sweet potion I rescued from an eternity without me. Just don’t let it go to your head!

Drink #109: Mad Fuzzy Melonade

Mad Fuzzy Melonade Cocktail Recipe

Sip Adivsor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
A sweet and sour drink, I enjoyed it despite the fact that it was not a very boozy drink (the Watermelon Pucker is only 15%). The drink tasted similar to a watermelon Jolly Rancher candy, so can’t complain!

April 2 – Lady Luck

Sex, Lies and Video Poker

I feel as if Lady Luck has always smiled down upon me. I can remember countless times that I’ve found money (and we’re not talking about nickels and dimes… the real shizzle) out and about: $5 outside a pub (after my drink had been bought for me, as well), or $20 as I waited in line to buy a wrestling action figure as a kid. You get the picture.

Lady Luck

This brings me to my greatest night out gambling in Las Vegas. The action may seem tame and the winnings mild to many, but it was a wonderful rush for me.

We were in Sin City to celebrate Broski Sip’s 21st birthday. The trip had gone very well to that point, but Mrs. Sip had now departed the group since she had to get back home early for school stuff (I had so far failed to bring her up to my Fonzie-like cool status… which is probably why she earns so much more than me now). We grabbed some drinks and hit the Treasure Island casino floor to try our luck.

Growing up, I played a lot of video poker on a handheld device I was given one Christmas. I decided to try my hand at that, too intimidated to play Texas Hold’em, Blackjack or anything else with live people.

Might have had a chance taking some money from this friendly fella!

Might have had a chance taking some money from this friendly fella!

Putting in a whopping $5, I figured I’d play until I was wiped of my massive funds and then concentrate on something I do best: drinking!

Early on I fluctuated back and forth, never making any serious gains, but I wasn’t losing much either. Then I started hitting some big hands. Two four-of-a-kind draws materialized in the span of about 10 hands and before I knew it, I was up $40. Not bad for video poker and starting small. The winning continued and I was having a ball. Surely casino officials would soon be approaching me for enrollment in the High Rollers Club now that I’d surpassed $50 in winnings!

What I expected to last about 10 minutes (if I was lucky) was now entering a second hour of play. I decided to set a drop out limit and when I finally came back down to about $50, I cashed out and proudly coddled the strip of paper that announced my earnings. It would have been nice to be back in the old days of casinos and actually have a massive bucket of coins to embrace, but then video poker may not have existed (and Back to the Future tells us that I would not have been born, in that case).

At least I knew when to stop!

At least I knew when to stop!

In need of a beverage top-up and not wanting to waste my precious windfall on grossly expensive casino cocktails, I made the trip back to my room, where we had a couple bottles of booze we needed to get through. En route, Lady Luck said, “Here’s one more little surprise… you’ve earned it!” and there, on the carpet in the hall was a crisp $20 bill, just lying there waiting for me. I looked around, and with the entire corridor empty, made the conclusion that nobody else deserved to claim this cash any more than me, so I snagged it and proclaimed, “This is the greatest night of my life!”

Drink #92: Lady Luck

Lady Luck Drink Recipe

  • 1 oz Gin
  • 1 oz Blue Curacao
  • Top with Orange Juice
  • Garnish with Orange Twist and Maraschino Cherry

This cocktail is sure to give you all the blessings you need to match my $50 record winnings. May Lady Luck look over you and all your loved ones as you join me in the High Roller Executive Club!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3 Sips out of 5):
My favourite detail about this cocktail is probably the garnish, with the Maraschino Cherry wrapped up by the Orange Twist. I wasn’t overwhelmed by the taste of the cocktail and it was a little thick thanks to the Orange Juice.