Tag Archives: Oysters

Love & Hate – Pickleback

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Over the next week, I’ll take a look at items to love and hate over the course of a meal: starter, main, dessert. Today, we look at appetizers, which offer a great snack, shared plate or meal. Here are some appies the Sip Advisor loves:

Chicken Fingers/Wings

Since my earliest days, Chicken Strips have played a large role in my dietary life and that continues to this day. With them being one of the few things Boy Sip will eat, they are often served in our home and also while out and about. I also like Chicken Wings, but prefer them boneless where possible. The fun thing about wings is all the crazy flavours you can use to change up the experience.

Sliders

Whether beef, chicken or pork, everything is more fun when in miniature form, and that includes sandwiches and burgers. Sliders basically takes countless restaurant favourites and shrinks them down to the point that you can have a few of them, rather than one bigger serving. This makes it easy to share amongst your group, while also getting to try multiple items.

Chicken Wings

Poutine/Dirty Fries

Crispy fries, covered with any number of toppings, can be incredibly satisfying. One of my favourite tavern meals is a Teriyaki Pulled Pork Poutine, found at the Billy Miner Pub in Maple Ridge. Honestly, it’s the only reason to travel to that locale. Ma Sip and I recently collaborated on the idea of doing a poutine bar (a more dangerous version of a salad bar), where a few different proteins were offered, along with a number of other fixings.

Pretzels

The Sipplings love soft pretzels and they provide a good way of tiding them over while Mrs. Sip and I enjoy a beer at craft breweries. I’d say my favourite pretzel is the giant one sold at Disneyland California Adventure, which is big enough to feed myself and the kids, while I sip a beer and Mrs. Sip rides the Guardians of the Galaxy drop tower.

Gyoza

I’ve recently gotten really into gyoza/dumplings, ordering them at restaurants where they’re offered and even buying them for making at home. The key to these is the sauces you can put on them or have on the side for dipping. It’s been a long time since I visited a Dim Sum restaurant, despite having many nearby. I think I’d enjoy the experience even more now, given my newly-found love of dumplings.

Pretzel

While the appetizer/starter section of any menu can contain many gems, not all that is offered here is worth selecting. Here are some hors d’oeuvres the Sip Advisor hates:

Dips with Chips

There is nothing more uninspired on a restaurant’s menu than chips and dip. I don’t care what the dip is – spinach, artichoke, salsa, cheese, etc. – this is something I can easily make at home with little effort. And the cost for some of these combos is insane. You could get a large container of the dip and full bag of chips for the same price you’ll pay for a handful of chips and small bowl of dip at a restaurant.

Lettuce Wraps

Let me get this straight. I’m supposed to take a leaf of lettuce, spread something onto it, roll the lettuce up and… eat it!? Why is lettuce involved at all? Just eat the damn thing that is supposed to go on the lettuce. Better yet, put it on a bun where it probably belongs. Apparently, ‘lettuce sandwich’ has become a metaphor for something that is mundane and unappealing. That makes so much sense!

Chips & Dip

Bread/Buns

Speaking of buns… sure, I’ll fill up on something that hampers my ability to complete my meal. There was a time when the Sip Advisor was younger – and dumber – and I would indulge in “free” bread/buns. Today, I rarely touch the stuff, leaving all available stomach room for the real food that’s about to be served and not the stuff meant to keep you occupied while you wait.

Oysters

I know some folks go crazy for oysters, buying dozens at a time at exorbitant cost, but I’ve never understood the appeal of choking down these mollusks. Not to mention, the dreaded experience of getting any shell in your meal. I suppose they’re popular because of the legend that they can be an aphrodisiac, but I don’t need any help in that department. Mrs. Sip needs to find me some anti-aphrodisiacs!

Oysters

Charcuterie Plates

Mrs. Sip and her gaggle of wine-swilling friends are obsessed with charcuterie platters. I, on the other hand, believe them to be the tool of the devil. You get a few crackers, some cheese offerings, maybe some pickles or pickled onions and a couple dips. How is that so impressive places will charge more than you’d pay for a main course dinner elsewhere?

Jalapeno Poppers

I hate cream cheese (unless it’s part of a dessert), so that’s an easy strike against these starters. I also believe jalapenos should be a garnish and not a feature of any dish. I do like that these weapons of destruction are sometimes referred to as Armadillo Eggs, but that’s not enough for the Sip Advisor to eat them. There are just so many better things to deep fry and serve up.

Love & Hate: Pickleback

Pickleback

  • 1.5 oz Irish Whiskey
  • 1.5 oz Pickle Juice
  • Garnish with a Pickle Slice

Given we’re starting our meal with smaller portions, I thought a shot recipe would be perfect. I went with the Pickleback, given another appy I like on occasion is Deep Fried Pickles. Now that the first course has been completed, next up it’s time to salivate over the all the entrees on the menu.

September 25 – Mojo

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Aphrodisiastic

I’m the kind of guy that’s ready to go at all hours of the day. I don’t need any food, drink, or other item to ‘put me in the mood’. I’ve come to understand that not everyone is as awesome as the Sip Advisor and therefore, I’m here to help all you little sippers out there that need an extra boost to get your mojo fired up. Here is an examination of some of the many items purported to help with libido!:

Chocolate – Named an aphrodisiac by women just so they can stuff their faces with the stuff and have an excuse to do so. In the end, they just complain they’re too full and not in any mood for making whoopee.

chocolate-aphrodisiac

Oysters – Well, I suppose the whole ‘slimy substance travelling down your throat’ could be practice for fun times later?

Spicy Peppers – These are sure to simulate some part of the body!

Snake Blood – Why not drink the snake’s venom, as well!? I think the only reason snake’s blood is an aphrodisiac is because once you kill one, your heart is pumping so fast you’d be ready to bed a rhino.

Dried Tiger Penis – Oh sure, this will be an easy find. Tiger’s are cuddly and approachable right!? Just like stuffed animals!

No, not that Tiger!

Bull Genitals – Why do all these cultures think that consumption of animal junk will make them more virile?

Spanish Fly – The European Blister Beetle can apparently provide a long-lasting erection that will later require medical attention. Is it worth it?

Fetal Duck Egg – Thanks for this haunting image, Asia. Apparently the fetal duck is most potent after 17 days, begging the question: who tests this stuff?

Stewed Crocodile – Sure crocs are cold-blooded killers, but I really don’t see that translating into sexual prowess, unless you plan on holding your lover underwater until they’re unconscious first.

crocodile toy

Looks like kitty got the message!

Leaf-Cutter Ants – At least they’re supposed to taste like bacon when roasted.

Deep-Fried Tarantula – I’m pretty sure Mrs. Sip would kick me out of our place if I even suggested deep-fried tarantula for snack time. I bet it won’t be long before this delicacy is being served at fairs around the world, right next to those deep-fried Mars bars!

Ambergris – This solid, waxy substance is either regurgitated or defecated by sperm whales… you know what, you already lost me…

Pumpkin Pie – So I guess people are only going to get laid around Thanksgiving… at least they’ll have something to be thankful for!

Pineapple – I always told Mrs. Sip that she should get into Hawaiian pizza. It’s tough when you’re always right!

Drink #268: Mojo

Sept 25

  • 1 oz Rum
  • 1 oz Cherry Liqueur
  • Top with Beer
  • Splash of Cola
  • Splash of Sweet & Sour Mix
  • Splash of Orange Juice
  • Splash of Pineapple Juice
  • Garnish with Tiger Penis (kidding!)

Why can’t things like hamburgers and hot dogs be aphrodisiacs? Why does it always have to be the weird stuff!? I’m going to go find me some ambergris and pester Mrs. Sip for a little roll in the hay!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
Wow, this cocktail was good. I was weary of how it would turn out given how many ingredients it called for and which ingredients you were expected to be mixing together, but I really enjoyed the finished product. Cola and Beer mix together much better than I could have ever imagined!

March 23 – Windshield Wiper Fluid

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Gross Income

Having the opportunity to travel and live abroad has also brought opportunities to try new, weird, and different flavours. After you read this list, you will question the fact that I was a picky eater when I was younger. Over the years, my tastes have expanded and my willingness to try seemingly anything has skyrocketed. I blame the constant liquorization of my body, mind and spirit, but other theories do persist. Without further ado, here are the oddest things I’ve personally eaten.

Funny Pictures of Cats and Kittens

Escargot

In France, our tour group was offered this French delicacy and this was at a time when my tastes were just evolving. It probably didn’t help that the snails were simply served on a bed of green leaves and looked like someone had just picked them out of the garden. As Mrs. Sip and I approached the serving tray, there was only one more shelled snail available. I was elected to try the hors d’oeuvre and while Mrs. Sip snapped pictures of my eating experience, I learned that escargot actually tastes pretty good… with a nice garlic butter sauce, of course, to mask the whole slimy snail bit.

Frog Legs

This was a menu item on one of the first cruises Mrs. Sip and I took and the server was kind enough to put in an order for us to share, on top of our other appetizer selections. These weren’t bad, although I can’t remember what kind of sauce they were done in and there wasn’t much meat to them. Sometimes the “tastes like chicken” expression actually holds true. The only problem is the legs looked like… well like long, dead frog legs. Still, it was fun to give them a whirl and cross it off the “foods you have to try” list.

Cheese

Okay so I hear you wondering, how is cheese classified as odd? Well I hate cheese. Just downright detest it. I don’t mind it in most melted situations like on pizza, nachos, and grilled cheese sandwiches, but even then, I prefer a mild form, like mozzarella. In recent years, I’ve tried to buck this childhood trend and try some more adventurous options. Some have been okay, while others not so much. Smoked Gouda on a sandwich went well, as did feta on Greek salads. Bleu cheese on a pizza however, while eaten, was not enjoyed.

GUILTY!!!

GUILTY!!!

Fried Rattlesnake

I’m deathly afraid of snakes, but when I was younger, only seven years old, I mustered the courage to try fried rattlesnake when my family was travelling throughout the old west. This was another one of those “it tastes like chicken” cases and we were even given some dried rattlesnake bone, along with a certificate saying we tried the delicacy, as keepsakes.

Oysters

While I’ve had many of these in recent years and some have been tasty, I still don’t get the whole buzz around them. You swallow whole, a slimy lump of indeterminate origin, which you’ve packed various flavours onto to mask the actual taste, and this is supposed to be an aphrodisiac? Quite frankly it sounds very similar to the end result of most dirty movies to me. Why are most girls okay with oysters, but not the other thing… you know what I’m getting at.

Drink #82: Windshield Wiper Fluid

Windshield Wiper Fluid Shooter

  • Rim glass with Sour Apple Pop Rocks
  • 0.75 oz Blue Curacao
  • 0.75 oz Sour Puss Apple

So, I bet you’re asking what The Sip Advisor still won’t eat. Well, I still largely avoid cheese in most situations and I think yogurt is disgusting. Sadly, Mrs. Sip’s diet largely consists of dairy and so we don’t see eye to eye on a number of these items. I’m more awesome than her though (as if it still needs to be written), so my say goes (or so I like to tell myself).

Would I ever actually drink windshield wiper fluid? My head says no, but my heart says give it a shot (poison warnings be damned)!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
A light and very tasty shooter. Blue Curacao and Sour Puss Apple have contrasting tastes that mix well. The Sour Apple Pop Rocks were a fun addition to the recipe.