Bar Crawl

When I profiled the original Lounge Lizard cocktail, I discussed my favourite real-life bars. Today, I turn reality upside down and present to you, my little sippers, the best of fictional bars. Sometimes we all wish these places were real. Seriously, though, it seems like every single show in history has featured a watering hole as a recurring setting (thus making this list extremely difficult to narrow down):

Cheers – Cheers

Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name… I bet everyone who read that last line, sang it in their head! How great would it be to hang out with a regular Joe like Norm Peterson. Or shoot the shit with bartenders like Sam Malone and Woody Boyd. You could even get your daily dose of factually inaccurate trivia from Cliff Claven or some psychiatric treatment from Frasier Crane. Everyone in the place had something to offer – except maybe Paul, but we’ll let it slide.

Moe’s Tavern – The Simpsons

While Moe’s Tavern may not be the highlight of any visit to Springfield, it’s a decent joint that means a lot to its regulars. The bar has gone through a number of style changes with the times, usually to capitalize on some trend – gay bar, family restaurant, stylish martini bar (wouldn’t that be the same as the gay bar!?) – but it always returns to its former glory by episode’s end.

The Broken Stool – The Cleveland Show

After moving from Quahog, Rhode Island to Stoolbend, Virginia, Cleveland Brown promptly found himself a new group of friends – “there’s old friends, new friends and even a bear” – who regularly convene at The Broken Stool. There’s nothing like having a favourite haunt for you and your best buds and having a bear as a pal would absolutely rule. You could get him to catch fish for you and stuff.

Merlotte’s & Fangtasia – True Blood

In the True Blood universe, you have the best of both worlds. First, there’s Merlotte’s, where normal people can go to enjoy a drink or some southern cooking and crazy shit often happens. At Fangtasia, vampires, humans and werewolves alike can enjoy an evening of debauchery and crazy shit ALYWAS happens. How either owner can keep their places running with the high death rate (including to staff) and constant turmoil at each location, is beyond my comprehension.

Roger’s Place – American Dad

I dream of my own man-cave bar set-up one day… not that I don’t have that already, but it’s not in a man-cave. Neither is Roger’s Place, alien Roger Smith’s bar in the attic of the Smith family home. Here, Roger waxes philosophical for his visitors – usually suggesting a solution to their problem that gets them into even more trouble. Next time I’m bartending for the Sip Advisor friends and family, I’m going to give out bad advice… whether people want to hear it or not.

The Warsaw – The Drew Carey Show

One of the best features of this bar, was you could live above it, as Lewis and Oswald did, complete with their own fire pole into the place. Can you imagine how happy I, the Sip Advisor, would be if I could roll out of bed in the morning and ride a pole down to my favourite bar? Oh wait, I practically do that already, minus the pole and if you add a little more crawling to the trek.

Drink #35: Lounge Lizard #2

• 1 oz Coconut Rum
• 1 oz Blue Curacao
• 1 oz Melon Liqueur
• Top with lemon-lime soda
• Garnish with lemon and lime wheels

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
The Lounge Lizard family of cocktails may be one of my favourite. Here, you have Coconut Rum, Blue Curacao and Melon Liqueur all getting together to party as lemon-Lime Soda plays DJ and lays down some dope tracks. Not sure of what exactly I just wrote… let’s just say that the drink is spectacular.