Missouri – Planter’s Punch

Each week, the Sip Advisor will alphabetically travel the United States, discovering the best each state has to offer in a variety of subjects. Today, we’re in the Show Me State, which sounds titillating, but doesn’t mean what most think. Missouri is also the Gateway to the West, so westward we go:

Motto: “Let the welfare of the people be the supreme law” – This is one slogan I can get down with.

Food: Who doesn’t like an Ice Cream Cone? This ice cream delivery device was made famous when at the 1904 World’s Fair, in St. Louis, an ice cream vendor ran out of cups and bought some waffles from a neighbouring stall, rolling them up to act as a cone. In 2008, Ice Cream Cones were named Missouri’s State Dessert.

Drink: Another product popularized at the 1904 World’s Fair, was Iced Tea. Richard Blechynden, a tea plantation owner and merchant, served it up to fairgoers looking to beat the heat. Also, 7 Up was invented by Missourian, Charles Leiper Grigg, in 1929. Originally named Bib-Label Lithiated Lemon-Lime Soda, the drink was rebranded 7 Up Lithiated Lemon Soda, before simply 7 Up.

7 Up

Site to See: The Gateway Arch, in St. Louis, is the tallest man-made national monument in the country. Standing 630 feet tall, it is also the tallest arch in the world. It is named for being viewed as the “gateway to the west,” installed to mark America’s westward expansion.

Street: With western expansion, three famous routes all had their starts in western Missouri: the Pony Express mail service and both the Oregon Trail and Santa Fe Trail. All three can still be travelled today, for those wanting to get a glimpse of the past, while enjoying modern comforts.

TV Show: Crime drama Ozark, starring Jason Bateman and Laura Linney, is about a family forced to move to the city of Osage Beach, when a Mexican drug cartel money laundering scheme goes awry. There, they set up another operation and have to deal with Missouri crime families. The series has produced three seasons and 30 episodes, while receiving a number of Emmy Award nominations.

Movie: As much as I want to select Road House here, I will go with Gone Girl, thanks to being an overall good movie and for having a very good twist in its story. Based on a book by Missourian, Gillian Flynn, this psychological thriller keeps viewers guessing as to how things will play out. The film made numerous top 10 lists for 2014 and there is potential for a sequel.

Gateway Arch

Book/Author: Mark Twain was born in Missouri, with his most famous works set in the state and based on his life. This includes the adventures of characters such as Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. Twain is recognized as one of the country’s most notable writers, even being called “the father of American literature.”

Fictional Character: Star-Lord (aka Peter Quill), leader of the Guardians of the Galaxy, is originally from Missouri (at least in the movie universe)… until he is abducted by a space ship, becoming a intergalactic mercenary and scavenger. Star-Lord is an unlikely hero, along with the rest of the Guardians, but he gets the job done, to his own beat, thanks to mixed tapes left to him by his mom.

Fictional City: St. Petersburg is the setting for the stories of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. It was inspired by Hannibal, where Mark Twain was raised. Hannibal has taken advantage of this connection, marking many spots around the city, including the Mark Twain Cave and Huck Finn Freedom Center. They also celebrate Tom Sawyer Days, with contests and fireworks.

Actor/Actress: A few favourites of mine hail from Missouri, including Dick Van Dyke, John Goodman and Jon Hamm. Comedy legend, Van Dyke, from West Plains, is still going strong at the age of 94. Goodman, born in Affton, is best known from TV show Roseanne, but has also appeared in many movies. St. Louis’s own, Hamm, took a while to grow on me, as I wasn’t a fan of Mad Men; however, I now love him in most of his roles.

Mark Twain

Song: Missouri Waltz was made the State Song of Missouri, in 1949. It has been performed by legends such as Bing Crosby, Gene Autry, Perry Como, and Johnny Cash. Published in 1914, the tune gained popularity when Missourian, Harry Truman, served as president from 1945 to 1953, despite Truman greatly disliking the song.

Band/Musician: Rock and roll pioneer, Chuck Berry, was born in St. Louis. Nicknamed the ‘Father of Rock and Roll,’ Berry’s best known songs include Roll Over Beethoven and Johnny B. Goode. Fellow musician, Sheryl Crow, is also from the state. Tracks like If It Makes You Happy and Everyday Is a Winding Road, made Crow a household name in the late 1990’s.

People: Legendary outlaw, Jesse James, was born in Kearney. He became a Robin Hood-esque celebrity criminal following the Civil War, robbing banks, trains and stagecoaches, throughout the Midwest. James also died in Missouri, as the $10,000 bounty on his head was collected by a member of his own gang.

Animal: The world famous Budweiser Clydesdales, introduced in 1933 to celebrate the end of Prohibition, are born and bred in Boonville. The horses are trained at Grant’s Farm, near St. Louis, which was formerly the Busch family estate. The Clydesdales are best known for their appearances in company ads, particularly for the Super Bowl.

Invention: The term “the greatest thing since sliced bread” is used to describe landmark creations. Well, how about the original? Sliced bread was made possible by Otto Frederick Rohwedder and first used by Missouri’s Chillicothe Baking Company. A local newspaper described the advancement as “the greatest forward step in the baking industry since bread was wrapped.”

Crime: Missouri has a number of “massacres” in its history books. These include the Haun’s Hill Massacre, where a Mormon settlement was attacked, resulting in the bloodiest event of the 1838 Mormon War, and the Civil War-era Palmyra Massacre and Centralia Massacre, which saw the execution of Confederate prisoners of war at the former and slaughter of unarmed Union soldiers at the latter.

Law: Missouri lawmakers seem particularly concerned with yard sales. In Jefferson County, these events can only happen between 7am and 8pm and can’t last more than three days. There goes the idea of a week-long garage sale rager. Also, in University City, yard sales can’t occur on front yards… but isn’t that safer than the alternative?

Sports Team: Missouri has four professional teams, split between the cities of Kansas City – Chiefs (NFL), Royals (MLB) – and St. Louis – Blues (NHL), Cardinals (MLB). The state has also lost a number of franchises from each of the Big 4 leagues: Kansas City Athletics and St. Louis Browns (MLB), Kansas City Scouts (NHL), Kansas City Kings and St. Louis Hawks (NBA), and St. Louis Cardinals and St. Louis Rams (NFL).

Sliced Bread

Athlete: Yogi Berra was a baseball legend, both on the field and in the dugout. An 18-time All-Star selection and 13-time World Series champion (10 as a player), Berra was one of the most decorated players in the sports history. His ‘Yogi-isms’ include verbal gems like: “90 percent of baseball is mental; the other half is physical.” and “You can observe a lot by watching.”

Famous Home: The Jesse James Home, in St. Joseph, is where the outlaw was assassinated by Robert Ford. Following the killing of James, people flocked to the home, trying to see the body and get their hands on memorabilia. The actual bullet hole from the round that killed James can be seen when visiting the site.

Urban Legend: Lemp Mansion, in St. Louis, is said to be haunted by members of the Lemp family, three of which committed suicide in the home. The family’s money came from the brewing industry, as Lemp Beer was the first to spread nationally; however, the company shut down due to Prohibition. Today, the mansion is a restaurant and inn, with tours available and even a murder mystery dinner theatre.

Museum: The Titanic Museum Attraction, in Branson, spared no expense with its presentation. Set within a Titanic replica, guests enter through a fabricated iceberg and are given a boarding ticket, complete with the name of an actual passenger (some who survived and others that didn’t). There is a similar museum in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee, with both complexes owned by John Joslyn, leader of a 1987 expedition to the vessel’s resting place.

Yogi Berra

Firsts: Missouri was the first state the erect a national monument dedicated to a non-president, as well as an African-American. The George Washington Carver National Monument can be found in Diamond, where Carver was raised. It honours his many contributions, particularly in the field of agricultural science.

Company: Anheuser-Busch InBev’s North American headquarters are located in St. Louis. The conglomerate is the largest brewing operation in the world. Budweiser, one of its many subsidiaries, also has a strong foothold in the city, with a brewery that offers tours. The St. Louis location is Budweiser’s oldest and largest facility. There’s also a Biergarten for folks to whet their whistle or try some brew-infused food.

Events: 1904 was a big year for Missouri. They hosted both the World’s Fair and the Summer Olympics (first Olympics on American soil), simultaneously. As a result, the Olympics lasted over four months, with one event taking place each day. The games were beset by issues, including St. Louis stealing the games from winning bidder, Chicago, and only 62 of the 651 athletes coming from outside North America.

Miscellaneous: Another nickname for Missouri, is the Cave State, as it has over 6,000 known caverns. Some of the more popular dwellings, include Bridal Cave, which hosts marriage ceremonies, and one in Richland, where the Cave Restaurant (the country’s only eatery inside a cavern) can be found.

Planter’s Punch

Planter's Punch

  • 3 oz Dark Rum
  • Splash of Lime Juice
  • Top with Club Soda
  • Dash of Simple Syrup
  • Dash of Grenadine
  • Dash of Angostura Bitters
  • Garnish with a Mint Sprig

The Planter’s Punch was created by the ‘Father of American Mixology,’ Jerry Thomas, while working at the Planter’s Hotel, in St. Louis. I like rum-heavy drinks, so this was well-received by the Sip Advisor. Be careful, though, after a couple of these, you’ll be floating as high as the Gateway Arch.

September 27 – Spinal Tap

I’m With the Band

For those about to rock… we salute you! And we also salute these fictional bands, some of which turned into real-life touring acts. Those which didn’t, should have. Hell, if the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles had a music tour at the height of their popularity in the early 90s, why can’t we see Faith+1 or Fingerbang around the world!?

#5: The Blues Brothers – The Blues Brothers/Blues Brothers 2000

When Jim Belushi and Dan Aykroyd took to the Saturday Night Live stage to perform as Jake and Elwood Blues, nobody knew how musically-gifted the two actually were. The sketches were turned into a feature film and the SNL alum even toured together, performing live on stage. With the unfortunate death of Jim Belushi, his brother John has filled in at times (as Zee Blues), as well as John Goodman, who joined Aykroyd as ‘Mighty’ Mack McTeer for the sequel Blues Brothers 2000. Aykroyd’s love of blues music has even resulted in his owning a percentage of the House of Blues restaurant and live performance chain.

Blues Brothers

#4: The Dale Gribble Bluegrass Experience – King of the Hill

The Experience consisted of the back alley crew (Hank, Dale, Bill and Boomhauer) with young Connie Psupnesphone on her violin – or as it’s referred to in blue grass, a fiddle. Boomhauer’s unintelligible southern drawl speech is perfect for bluegrass and the troupe made it all the way to performing at the Bluegrass Festival in Branson, Missouri, before Connie’s overbearing father Con interfered. Their cover of ‘Blue Moon of Kentucky’ sounded pretty good and they even talked country legend Charlie Daniels into filling in on the fiddle when Connie disappeared. Despite all their efforts, though, they did not win the festival competition.

#3: Spinal Tap – This is Spinal Tap

The greatest fake rock band to become a real rock band EVER! Made up of David St. Hubbins (Michael McKean), Nigel Tufnel (Christopher Guest), and Derek Smalls (Harry Shearer) and filmed mockumentary style, this film covered Spinal Tap’s journey to the top of the music world. Spinal Tap later appeared on The Simpsons, thanks to Shearer’s voice work on the series, forever cementing their status as a great fictional band, although the group actually tours and performs. This is one act you wouldn’t want to be a drummer for, though, as each prospective percussionist has died from bizarre accidents and under mysterious circumstances.

Spinal Tap

#2: The Be-Sharps – The Simpsons

Homer, Principal Skinner, Apu, Chief Wiggum and later Barney Gumble (replacing Wiggum) made up this little quartet. With a Grammy Award winning and number one hit ‘Baby On Board,’ the group seemed destined for superstardom, but in a case eerily similar to The Beatles, creative differences and an Asian woman forced the band to split and remain a one-hit wonder. The Simpsons has also featured other fictional groups and musicians, including Bleeding Gums Murphy, Lurleen Lumpkin, the Party Posse, Captain Bart and the Tequila Mockingbirds, Sadgasm, and even Kirk Van Houten.

#1: Fingerbang & Faith+1 – South Park

Both of these bands are driven by the genius mind of Eric Cartman. First, he created Fingerbang, an attempt at capitalizing on the boy band craze. The death of Kenny – crushed by an elevator during a concert at the local mall – thwarted them in the end. They did gain one fan, but promptly split up, realizing that such fame doesn’t allow for a normal life. Years later, Cartman splits from the boys garage band Moop, to form the Christian Rock-based Faith+1 with Butters and Token. Faith+1 goes on to be a hit, receiving a Mir album distinction. Cartman, expecting a gold record to win a bet with Kyle, goes on a profanity-laced tirade, ruining the band’s innocent image.

Super Saturday Shot Day: Spinal Tap

Spinal Tap Shot

  • 0.5 oz Vodka (I used Finlandia)
  • 0.5 oz Peach Schnapps
  • 0.5 oz Crème de Cacao
  • Garnish with a Guitar Pick

As usual, this list was extremely difficult to pare down. I would have loved to include groups like Jesse and the Rippers (Full House), the Zack Attack (Saved by the Bell), and The Electric Mayhem (The Muppets), among others. I did manage to sneak a sixth band into the post by doubling up the South Park entry, so consider yourself extra special today!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4.5 Sips out of 5):
I’m unsure of if this shooter has anything to do with the mockumentary band or if it’s more to do with the medical procedure… either way, I’m using it! And it is delicious. You get varying notes of Peach Schnapps and Crème de Cacao and both taste so good. Had I used a flavoured Vodka, I wonder if things would have got better or worse. Would a whole new flavour emerge, or would there be too many competing notes? The questions that keep the Sip Advisor up at night!