May 3 – The Terminator

Robot Rage

I’m curious as to when in my lifetime the world will first enjoy a wave of robots completing much of our daily routines for us before they rebel against their human overlords and annihilate us from the planet. It is within these hopes and fears that we look at the Top 5 robots in history:

#5: AutoBots – Transformers

Take your pick, but my favourites include Bumble Bee, Optimus Prime, and the DinoBots. This wicked cartoon, which launched a line of even cooler toys, introduced the world to a fight over energon cubes that still exists today. And they always said knowledge was power… quite clearly, it is in fact energy. I even respected some of the baddies (Decepticons) in this franchise, although Star Scream’s voice still pisses me off to this day.

Transformers Work

#4: Rosie – The Jetsons

The sassy robotic maid that many youngsters grew up on, dreaming of the day when they’d have their own animatronic hired help. That future is still ways away and you could probably blame The Jetsons for giving false hope to an entire generation. I feel Rosie screwed up too much to keep her job, so she must have had something incriminating on George, the man of the house. Either that, or they were boinking behind Jane’s back!

#3: WALL-E – WALL-E

While WALL-E (an acronym for Waste Allocation Load Lifter – Earth-Class) is only capable of saying his own name, it’s very easy to fall in love with the little android, as he searches for fellow automaton EVE, who he has fallen in love with. Due to the popularity of the character and movie, real WALL-E robots have been designed and manufactured, including one which can be seen roving the Disneyland theme park. There’s an autograph I’d love to have!

Wall-E

#2: Johnny 5 – Short Circuit

This loveable piece of machinery went from a section of the manufacturing assembly line to becoming a sentient being, who loves to learn and needs to consume constant stimuli. While I agree with his stance on TV, movies, and even music, his enjoyment of books is something I don’t share. Still, I hold no ill-will towards the robot. Johnny 5 even out-acted Steve Guttenberg, which is no small feat.

#1: Bender Bending Rodriguez – Futurama

This chain-smoking, drink-guzzling hunk of metal uses his gruff exterior to hide… well, an even gruffer inside, really. Bender is always looking for a get-rich-quick scheme and will stop at nothing to achieve his debaucherous desires. Throughout the Planet Express adventures, we also met androids like Santa Claus (an evil gift-giver, of course), the robot devil, Calculon, Kwanzaa-Bot, Flexo, and the Epsilon Rho Rho fraternity.

Super Saturday Shot Day: The Terminator

The Terminator Shot

  • 0.5 oz Yukon Jack Perma Frost
  • 0.5 oz Sambuca
  • 0.5 oz Jagermeister Spice
  • Garnish with Gummy Eye Candy

Some honourable mentions should be handed out to the likes of Kevin, Screech’s robot servant on Saved by the Bell, as well as the Fembots from Austin Powers… I’d let those ladies do whatever they wanted with me!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
While neither the T-800, T-1000, or Terminatrix (she could tie me down anyday!) managed to make this list’s cut, I did find a way to include the robot as today’s shot of choice. For garnish, I even found a Gummy Eye Candy from Halloween that worked with the theme of robots. I added a little Jagermeister Spice to the recipe to liven things up and the whole concoction was so good, I made it twice!

November 23 – Oatmeal Cookie

Whiskey Laughs

Whiskey is such a good friend to all of Sip Nation that it doesn’t even mind us sharing a few laughs at its expense. Thank you for all the good times sir whiskey, the great!

Pure Kentucky Whiskey

I wholeheartedly agree that whiskey is a cure for all ailments. Look no further than my Whiskey Sick Day article from last April. It is no coincidence that just days after downing this cocktail (the things I do for all you little sippers) I was feeling better and over my illness. I’ve never really ended up on the bathroom floor for any reason, but I’ve seen friends end up there and it’s pretty hilarious!

Funeral Whiskey

I’m that guy that brings whiskey nearly everywhere I go: wedding, funeral, sporting event, bris, dentist appointment… you name it! Whiskey will get you through whatever situation is in front of you. That’s right, whatever your girlfriend, wife, parents, siblings, family are set to put you through, just keep your old pal whiskey close by and all will go well… trust me!

Fireball-Chocolates

For the record, I would love to get Fireball Whiskey as a Valentine’s Day gift. I hope Mrs. Sip is paying attention to this article. She usually gets me liquor as presents, but I just want her to know that those gifts are greatly appreciated. Sex is cool too, if you’re taking notes (wink)!

favorite-nusery-ryhme-freebird

Freebird is a pretty wicked song… perhaps one of the best southern anthems of all time! Although I know this can be an issue for some people, I’m okay with these posed photos with kids looking like they’re boozing or smoking or whatever. For the most part, I find them pretty innocent and funny. Every kid needs a photo of them when they were little ones holding a beer bottle or having a pack of smokes nearby. It’s a rite of passage!

soup-of-the-day

If I ever saw this sign outside a bar, I would drop everything I was doing and promptly enter said establishment! I’m not even a fan of soup and have never really understood the concept of people getting soup at restaurants when it’s pretty friggin’ easy to make a bowl of hot liquid on your own. A mystery I may never be able to solve!

Drink #327: Oatmeal Cookie

Oatmeal Cookie Shooter

  • 0.5 oz Butterscotch Schnapps
  • 0.5 oz Irish Crème
  • Splash of Jagermeister Spice
  • Splash of Goldschlager
  • Splash of Fireball Whiskey
  • Garnish with Oatmeal Cookie

If you know of any good whiskey memes out there in internet land, please send them along, care of The Sip Advisor, PO Box 71169, and I’ll be happy to enjoy a quick chuckle over the joke. Much love, little sippers!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I’m not sure how much this shot tastes like an oatmeal cookie. There’s definitely a noticeable cinnamon flavour thanks to most of the spirits used, but I don’t think it exactly hits on the intended taste. That could be my fault, as I altered some of the recipe. It still tasted good and it was my first chance to use Jagermeister Spice, which I also tried on its own and it looks like we’ll become fast friends!