December 27 – Hammered Farmer

Experience Points

I got to thinking the other day about things that must be experienced as a drinker. The rites of passage as a boozehound, if you will. Here’s some of the items that crossed my mind and I believe made me the Sip Advisor I am today!

Drink from a Funnel – Friends of Mrs. Sip and myself had this funnel they called Skeletor (thanks to it being a skull), which was fun drinking out of and made for a good dare as part of drinking games.

Funnel Fail

Do a Keg Stand – As a kid, I was always standing on my head. It’s something I did well and I still do head stands on many objects I find. Combine that with chugging beer and you have the infamous keg stand. I think I did pretty well in my only attempt.

Use a Flask – I first bought a flask in my early 20’s and have since upgraded to a much nicer one, which I gave out to each of the groomsmen and ushers in my wedding. As I’ve written before, Fireball is my go-to flask filler and it has seen me through many wild nights.

Buy Booze as a Minor – While I didn’t frequently do this, it did happen from on a couple occasions and without incident. It truly shows your dedication to the sport.

Enjoy an Open Bar – I’ve been lucky enough to attend a few “open bar” functions in my time. Sometimes those bars haven’t been very lucky to have me as a guest!

Rent a Keg – This is something I have yet to do personally. Sure, I’ve been to the odd keg party, but I’ve never hosted one. We’ve often bandied about the idea of getting a keg for my annual beer pong tournament, but letting folks drink whatever they wish has always won out over the mass serving. I did have a mini keg that travelled through some of Europe with me, if that counts.

Tap the Keg

Drunken Karaoke – Is there any other kind of karaoke!?

Buy a Round for a Group – It’s always important to take your rightful turn in buying drinks for the group. Just make sure you get yours back in due time.

Invent a Cocktail – Clearly this is no longer an outstanding issue for the Sip Advisor…

Buy a Woman a Drink – Does Mrs. Sip count? If so, then check!

Play Drinking Games – Whether it’s Beer Pong, Quarters, King’s Cup, Flippy Cup, or anything else, drinking games are an essential element of boozing fun. I’d say go easy on rookies, but they should know what they’re getting themselves into.

battle-shots

Go on a Beer/Wine Tour – In the course of this project, I’ve detailed the wine and beer tours I’ve been privileged to go on. Next up comes some visits to hard alcohol distilleries.

Do a Shot Challenge – Whether it’s one you create on your own or something hosted by a bar, these are always a fun way to get smashed and stretch your drinking limits. Mrs. Sip and I took part in one notable challenge in Nice, France, where we (along with three others) had to down all of our 10 shots in successive order. I was the only one ballsy enough to include a couple Flatliners in my set.

Visit a Beer Hall – Drinking around the world has become a huge part of travel for Mrs. Sip and I, whether it’s trying news beers, wines, and spirits, or visiting booze landmarks across the globe. The beer hall we enjoyed in Munich, Germany was among these great memories.

Do a Pub Crawl – Man are these fun… I’ve done crawls in a lot of parts of the world (Key West, Florida; Preston, England; Honolulu, Hawaii; etc.) and they’re always full of laughs, adventure, and of course alcohol. Map out a route and hit the town!

Bar Crawl

Survive a Hangover – Does it count if I’ve helped someone through their hangover? Remember, the Sip Advisor is immune from rough morning afters.

Be Known by Name at a Bar – While I have yet to find a place “where everybody knows my name”, the Sip Alliance was recognized at The Yard House in Hawaii as “Oh, you guys are back!”

Ride a Mechanical Bull – This should only be done while blitzed because it limbers you up for the eventual fall. I achieved this at the PBR Rock Bar in Las Vegas this year (twice!) and it was totally worth the resulting crotch bruising.

Hit Multiple Fast Food Joints on the Same NightGuilty as charged. Just the other day, Mrs. Sip and I grabbed some Mickie D’s takeout and while passing by a Mega Bite pizza shop, I joked we should grab some slices for the road as well. Before I knew it, Mrs. Sip was in there snatching some before we were on our way again!

Drink #361: Hammered Farmer

Hammered Farmer Drink Recipe

  • 1.5 oz Spiced Rum (I used New Orleans)
  • Top with Root Beer
  • Splash of Apple-Lime Juice
  • Garnish with a Lemon Wheel

What else do you think qualifies as a rite of passage for experienced drinkers? I wanted to include my feat of drinking a beer underwater, but Mrs. Sip insisted it was so rare and awesome that I was the only that would qualify. She’s always pumping my tires!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
This is one of those bizarre recipes where they recommend way too much booze to make a decent drink. They say you should use 4 oz of Spiced Rum. While that will achieve the desired effect of being a Hammered Farmer, the cocktail’s taste will be way too strong. I dumbed the ingredients down to make a tasty drink where you can taste each element being presented. You’ll still get blasted, it just won’t be from one serving!

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July 26 – Beer’s Knees

Beerfest

Over my years, I’ve picked up many a drinking game (after all, who doesn’t like to increase their boozing fun with some friendly competition and laughs?). Here are some of my favourites:

Beer Pong

Playing in teams of two, Beer Pong is the art of throwing (or bouncing) ping pong balls across a table into cups on the other end. Depending on which cup you hit, you might be in line for bonus cups to be eliminated, which are then drunk by your foes. Eliminate all of your opponent’s cups and you win. At the Sip Advisor headquarters, I am the host of an annual Beer Pong tournament. This year will mark the fourth edition of the event, which has featured some of the finest pongers among my circle of friends and associates. We’re always trying to adapt our house rules to make the experience flow smoothly and provide guests with a great time. While it’s been three years since I last tasted championship glory in the inaugural tournament, I look to finally return to the winner’s circle this year and be the complete annoying, narcissist, ass I know I can be. Last note, always respect house rules where you’re playing!

Even Jesus played Beer Pong... looks like a shutout is brewing!

Even Jesus played Beer Pong… looks like a shutout is brewing!

Flippy Cup

Another very active drinking game, which features teams of three to five competing to down their beer and flip their cup, situated on the edge of the table, onto its top in a relay-style race. This game inspires great camaraderie amongst your mates and also vicious feuds with your opponents (or that one person on your team who costs you every race because they just can’t get the core concept of the game). It’s best to break up into teams (boys vs. girls, city yuppies vs. country bumpkins, or however you want to split the group) and duel it out in a best-of-seven series. Once the series has been decided, switch the teams up and go again. This game can get a little messy, so you might want to play outside, or on a table you don’t mind trashing a little before it’s cleaned up.

Never Have I Ever

This is the fastest way to get to know your friends more intimately than you ever intended (or possibly wanted). It’s a pretty simple game: sit in a circle of sorts and go around saying something you’ve never done before. Those who have actually done it, have to take a sip of their drink. You can throw anything out there, from feats of daredevilry (wow, that’s actually a word… I thought I was making it up) to actions of a more adult nature. There’s no real ending to this game unless people grow tired of their privacy being invaded or you just don’t have much else left to learn about your peeps. It’s a perfect game for camping and sitting around the fire pit. It can get a little rowdy however, so be careful of noise levels if you’re in a public place at later evening hours.

Never Have I

King’s Cup/Ring of Fire/Sociables

This is a great game when you just want to sit back and chill out, while getting bombed and having a ton of fun. It has multiple names, so use whichever you prefer. You start by laying out a full deck of cards in a ring around the center cup. Each card means something different and house rules can often vary. For example, 2 means you drink, while 3 means me drink, and so on, in other rules, 2 and 3, can mean give out those numbers of drinks.. Some cards have more active rules, like making up a rule that every player has to abide by and proposing a category that people have to name items for. Each time a King is drawn that player pours as much of his or her drink as they want into the centre cup. The game continues until the fourth King is pulled and whoever is unfortunate enough to draw that card has to down the center cup. This game can get interesting fast if everyone is drinking something different as anticipation grows as to who will draw the last king and be forced to drink the mixed brew!

Drink #207: Beer’s Knees

Beer's Knees Beer Drink

  • 1.5 oz Gin
  • 1 oz Lemon Juice
  • 1 oz Honey Syrup
  • Top with Hefeweizen (I used Rickard’s White)
  • Garnish with Lemon Wedge

The names and rules of some of these games may be different in your neck of the woods. I’m simply describing them as I know them. If you have any Beer Pong rule suggestions for my upcoming tournament, feel free to pass them along. We might not use the rule, but I always appreciate having options. Same thing goes for drinking games I’ve neglected to mention in this article.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
Lemon Juice tastes really good with Hefeweizen Beer (no surprise there!) and the touch of honey is a nice little bonus, adding a sweet ending to each sip of the beer cocktail.