July 2 – Journalist Cocktail

Journalistically Yours

Did you know that the Sip Advisor is actually a trained journalist, specializing in the field of sports writing? Well, today just happens to be World Sports Journalists Day. With that in mind, let’s take a look at some of the best fictional anchors, correspondents, and news teams!

Ron Burgundy & Channel 4 News Team – Anchorman

Ron Burgundy and the gang are a ratings sensation, which doesn’t please their rivals at Channel 2, especially fellow anchor Wes Mantooth. Aside from competition, Burgundy and company also have trouble in the form of women entering the news game and wanting their fair share of screen time and top stories. I can’t wait for the Anchorman sequel to come out and for so many new catchphrases to become part of the pop culture lexicon.

Anchorman

Will McAvoy & News Night Staff – The Newsroom

Mrs. Sip and I have just started watching this series and while I find all the yelling at each other and “I love my job so much I’m going to cry” looks very tiring, it’s a great program with amazing writing and characters you can actually root for (unlike another show that shall not be named because I refuse to have it linked in any way to these awesome “journalists”). The second season begins in just a couple weeks and we find ourselves learning more about the world through fiction than we do through, well…the actual news!

Channel 5 News Team – Family Guy

Led by anchor Tom Tucker and his wonderful mustache, the newscast also featured co-anchor Diane Simmons (until she snapped and tried to kill half the town’s residents), angry weatherman Ollie Williams, and token Asian reporter Tricia Takanawa. Tucker is the heart and soul of this team, though, and it’s always fun seeing him report on the absurd news that occurs in Quahog.

Stephen Colbert – The Colbert Report

Yes, Stephen Colbert is a real person, but his persona while delivering the news is completely fabricated… or at least we all hope it is! The super conservative’s take on world events highlights how insane some people’s view of the world can actually be. While I don’t watch The Colbert Report or Daily Show much anymore, I respect both Colbert and Jon Stewart for their work in becoming more trusted than actual newsmen.

Colbert

FYI Team – Murphy Brown

Featuring hard-hitting reporter Murphy Brown, the FYI program, based in Washington, D.C., does a top job on covering the American capital. Brown is joined by anchor Jim Dial, investigative journalist Frank Fontana, media darling Corky Sherwood, and executive produced Miles Silverberg. The show was known for taking many of their storylines straight from the real headlines. When not on the set, the FYI crew could often be found at their local watering hole, Phil’s, and that I can get down with!

Kent Brockman & Channel 6 News Team – The Simpsons

Springfield’s resident journalist, Kent Brockman, is a trusted source within the community, even if he does have a spotty news record. His feud with traffic reporter Arnie Pye has led to on-air arguments between the two, which is about as professional as you’d expect a person from Springfield to be. Brockman also hosts other programs, such as Eye on Springfield, Smartline, and even game show Springfield Squares. His segment ‘My Two Cents’ is a highlight of most broadcasts.

kentbrockman

The Lone Gunmen – X-Files

This troupe of nerd conspiracy theorists and magazine publishers has investigated some of the world’s greatest mysteries. Because of the nature of their examinations, they choose to remain underground and out of the public eye. Sadly, their spinoff show lasted only 13 episodes. While I never really watched the X-Files, I was interested in The Lone Gunmen because conspiracy theories are interesting to consider, while aliens bore me. Stunningly, the show’s pilot episode featured an attack on the World Trade Centre by hijacked planes six months before the actual 9/11 tragedy.

Weekend Update – Saturday Night Live

Whether you think of the original host, Chevy Chase, or the current presenter, Seth Meyers, Saturday Night Live has had a long run of comedians riffing on the news in what is often the show’s best segment. It’s hard to pick my favourite anchor or team among all the candidates, but I enjoyed Jane Curtain’s pairing with Dan Aykroyd, as well as the all-female duo of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.

Drink #183: Journalist Cocktail

Journalist Drink Recipe

  • 1.5 oz Gin (I used Hendrick’s)
  • 0.5 oz Sweet Vermouth
  • 0.5 oz Dry Vermouth
  • Splash of Triple Sec
  • Splash of Lemon Juice
  • Dash of Orange Bitters
  • Garnish with Lemon Wheel and Pen

This was a hard list to narrow down, as it seems every show has a news element to help forward storyline and such. I even had to cut Sesame Street’s resident journalist, Kermit the Frog!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I like this cocktail, despite my sometimes negative feelings about Vermouths. All the ingredients went well together and none were overwhelming in the recipe. The Hendick’s Gin was a nice touch.

February 22 – Blue Lagoon Margarita

National Margarita Day

Margarita, margarita, there ain’t nothin’ sweeter… that, my little sippers, is the little tune I sing whenever I’m having a margarita. And today is a holy day for those who love their tequila and triple sec (TNT) based drinks! To celebrate in my own way, I made a Blue Lagoon Margarita.

Margarita Day

Blue Lagoon (no relation to the cocktail) is a 1980 movie that is largely remembered for featuring a young Brooke Shields parading naked around a deserted island – although a body double was used in most scenes and Shields’ hair was glued to her breasts in others, but I digress – and that got me thinking about (among other more titular things) what I would want to have with me if I was stranded alone on an island.

Reading Material:

Well, there’s one fork in the road this can go down… I mean, you are all alone with no human contact for the foreseeable future. Porn may be the best choice here, however, here at The Sip, I like to think we are of average intelligence and class and therefore I will actually bring books with me (Mrs. Sip would be so proud). I would probably pack a collection of the Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader entries as these books are massive and full of thousands of interesting tidbits. Once you read them all, you could go back to the start and scan them over again, filling your head with so much trivia (aka useless knowledge) and nobody to share it with. If you were ever rescued, you could then go on Jeopardy and place second… gotta be careful with those daily doubles.

Watchables:

Obviously you can’t pack up your entire DVD collection for this trip and while resorting to a laptop filled with illegally downloaded movies and TV shows (again my legal counsel has forced me to state that the Sip Advisor does not endorse the illegal downloading of copyright material) would be the super-geek thing to do, you also have to consider the fact that there would be no outlets to charge your battery. Therefore, with a portable DVD player and an eight-hour battery I’m going to narrow my choices down to three movies: Slap Shot, Dumb & Dumber and Anchorman. The jury has spoken.

Tunes:

We are accustomed to going everywhere we travel with the ability to listen to our own music, creating a playlist for your entire life. On the island, though, you’d be limited to your one charge of battery, just like the DVD player. Would you use it all up in one epic jam, or would you spread the songs out over an extended period of time? I’d probably try to make everything seem like a montage and kill the battery in a matter of hours. I’m not very good with the long-term planning.

Island DVD & IPOD

Food & Drink:

My main concern here is how difficult it would be for me to create my own alcohol (and ice… warm drinks suck). Providing the island has lush amounts of fruits, I may be able to make my own flavoured concoctions. Maybe I would luck out and there would be a hidden stash of rum on the island like the one Captain Jack Sparrow was abandoned on.

As far as munchies go, a lifetime supply of potato chips would be great. Any flavor will do, except for any of those god-awful country-specific special flavours like Lamb & Mint (UK) or Vegemite (Australia). For the sweet tooth, any collection of chocolate should suffice. As for real food, who needs it? If no one is around to see how gross and out-of-shape you’re getting, does it really matter? And do you really want to max out your life expectancy on a deserted island?

Miscellaneous:

Oh, let’s see… the ability to harness electricity would surely help… you know, the usual stuff.

Comforts:

I think a pet is necessary when stranded. If I can’t have some sort of monkey sent to help me out, than a cat will do the trick. Anything to rid the island of all bird species, who provide nothing meaningful to my existence. Stupid poop machines.

Finally, if I could swing it, I’d have Mrs. Sip sent to the island to join me (kicking and screaming!). Then I’d impose the Brooke Shields rule into action and without a body double to do all the heavy lifting, you could finally call the place paradise!

Drink #53: Blue Lagoon Margarita

Blue Lagoon Margarita

  • 1 oz Tequila
  • 1 oz Blue Curacao
  • Splash of Lime Juice
  • Top with Pineapple Juice/Soda
  • Garnish with Orange Slice

Everyone has their own idea of what they would bring to a deserted island. What would help you survive the lonely exile?

Make sure to have your daily does of vitamin-M (margarita) today and party like it’s 2013!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (2.5 Sips out of 5):
I was disappointed with this recipe. Perhaps it’s because I used Pineapple Soda, instead of juice, which drastically changed the drink’s taste to a more fizzy one.

January 9 – Appletini

Signature Drinks

ChristopherDaniels-Appletini

One of my favourite wrestlers – yeah, that’s right, I watch wrestling, so what of it? I like to watch a good slobber-knocker every now and again, while sipping back the booze… mmm, booze… wait, where was I? As I was saying, one of my favourite wrestlers of all time, the ‘Fallen Angel’ Christopher Daniels, started a gimmick recently in which he’s always seen with an Appletini during interviews and even while coming down to the ring. This got me thinking (and drinking) about the Appletini, of course, and also about the characters out there that are associated with a particular drink, frequently having it in their possession.

Julian – Trailer Park Boys (Rum & Coke)

Julian rum and coke

It is a rare sight to see Julian without a rum and coke in his hands and there were many times throughout the run of Trailer Park Boys when viewers marveled over the tasks he was able to complete while not spilling his coveted beverage. Among them, playing street hockey and running from the cops in a high-speed chase.

Ron Swanson – Parks & Recreation (Scotch)

Tough as nails, Ron Swanson refuses to drink anything but Lagavulin Scotch. Only once has he departed from his nectar-of-choice, after co-worker Tom Haverford designed snake juice (described as a high-end Kahlua style liquor by its creator, but as basically rat poison by others – to be discussed in a future post on invented drinks) and bet Ron he would love it. Ron did and the result was the video posted below.

The Dude – The Big Lebowski (White Russian)

The Dude white russian

Throughout the movie, The Big Lebowski, The Dude enjoys nine White Russian cocktails. There’s even a drinking game out there, where players are supposed to have a White Russian every time The Dude has one. That’s an impressive feat and could be a future Liquor Challenge for myself (coming soon to The Sip Advisor)!

Don Draper – Mad Men (Old Fashioned)

Sorry, Don... no photo for you!

Sorry, Don… no photo for you!

Mad Men sucks… sorry, it had to be said. I love how my site can be a platform for me to hate things! I’d start writing about Mr. Draper, his drink of choice and his show, but too many words have been wasted on—

(see what I did there?)

Carrie Bradshaw – Sex and the City (Cosmopolitan)

Carrie Bradshaw cosmo

The ladies of Sex and the City revitalized this cocktail after making it their favourite libation. As I recently wrote in my Cosmo post, I do enjoy this drink and for that, I guess I have to thank Carrie and company for making it so popular in restaurants. In return for my gesture of gratefulness, I only ask that there be no more Sex and the City movies. Deal?

Ron Burgundy – Anchorman (Scotch)

Ron Burgundy scotch

“I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.” That is one of many amazingly funny quotes about scotch in Anchorman. I can’t wait for the Anchorman sequel, where I’m sure Ron will get back to his womanizing, scotch-loving ways. Stay classy, San Diego!

Burton Mercer – The Blues Brothers (Orange Whip)

The 'Orange Whip' isn't pictured, but you can tell that this guy is a booze hound!

The ‘Orange Whip’ isn’t pictured, but you can tell that this guy is a booze hound!

Mercer’s drinking of this beverage even inspired a renaissance of sorts for it. I definitely need to steal his way of asking who wants a drink. He basically makes a drink for each time he asks if anyone wants one and then likely enjoys them all, himself. “Who wants an orange whip? Orange whip? Orange whip? Three orange whips.” Ha, classic!

James Bond – James Bond Series (Vodka Martini/Vesper: shaken, not stirred)

james-bond-vesper-martini

Everybody has done the “shaken, not stirred” joke at some point in their life. We get it, you watch movies and can quote one of the shortest and most misinformed lines featured on the silver screen. The funny thing is that the way Mr. Bond has his drink constructed, is actually incorrect. Anytime you are only using alcohols, with no mixers involved, it’s recommended that you stir your ingredients, rather than shake, so as not to bruise the alcohol too much and diminish its taste. Tisk, tisk, James…

And finally…

J.D. – Scrubs (Appletini, easy on the tini)

JD appletini

And now we come full circle! Like wrestler, Christopher Daniels, J.D. on Scrubs loved his Appletinis. Despite the fact most bartenders mistook him for being female, as a result of his drink order, J.D. would not be deterred and that takes some balls. J.D. even paid $105 for an Appletini once, but found it a little too light on the ‘tini’. Let’s salute J.D. and make him a proper one.

Drink #9: Appletini

Appletini

The best part about putting this piece together is that it has inspired me to make some cocktails I had previously never tried. I’ve always wanted to try the Bond-styled martini – although I’ll be stirring my ingredients, thank you very much – and the Orange Whip intrigues me, as well. I also have never had a true old fashioned yet, but I will certainly not be thinking about ‘the show that shall not be named’ when I enjoy the classic concoction.

Have I missed anything? Did I neglect your favourite character and their drink of choice? Drop me a line and chew me out, just make sure to have fun with your insults. Until next time…

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I like the Appletini… there, I said it. That sour apple flavour, while not my favourite, is quite tasty. One must always be sure to use sour green apples for this recipe. I guess you could use red or golden delicious, but what would be the point.