April 6 – Fire Extinguisher

Weapons of Destruction

Well, it’s WrestleMania weekend, the best time of the year for sports entertainment fanatics. When I heard about this shooter, the first thing I thought of was hardcore matches, where one wrestler would spray another in the face with a fire extinguisher. Always good for a laugh, let’s see if it works as a shot as well. But first, here are some other great wrestling weapon choices while we sip away:

Coconut

One of the most famous feuds of the 1980’s was started when ‘Rowdy’ Roddy Piper bashed Fijian Superfly’ Jimmy Snuka over the head with a coconut following a verbal lashing that would now be classified as racially-fueled. This defined the term “foreign object”… I mean, what is a coconut doing at a wrestling show anyway!?

Piper-Snuka

The angle may have been controversial, but they turned it into an action figure set, so I guess that makes it all okay.

Mannequin Head

Deranged wrestler (aren’t they all!) Al Snow was often seen talking to a mannequin head, which came in handy during matches where he needed an extra edge. I’m sure the head told Al it didn’t appreciate being used as a blunt object, but Al was so out of his mind he probably didn’t take into account his friend’s concerns.

Kitchen Sink

Ever heard the term, “Everything, but the kitchen sink”? Well, during a Good Housekeeping Match between misogynist Jeff Jarrett and woman wrestler (and later porn star… how’s that for women’s lib?) Chyna, even a kitchen sink was used – as well as a toilet seat, salad tongs, mixing bowl, and ironing board. The match ended with both competitors covered in flour and with Chyna becoming the first ever female Intercontinental Champion.

Snakes

Indiana Jones least favourite animal (and the Sip Advisor’s) has actually been used as a weapon in wrestling rings. Jake “The Snake” Roberts has on a few occasions used pythons and cobras to attack his opponents. The dastardly attack even backfired on him once, ending with a snake biting at his own neck.

Sega Genesis/Super Nintendo/Laptop

Hardcore icon New Jack was known for bringing an entire garbage bin filled with weapons to the ring with him for matches – well, they could more likely be classified as attacks. One of his trademark assaults involved placing a vintage video game system or laptop on his victim’s crotch before smashing it with a crutch of other swingable object.

new-jack

New Jack: definitely not the kind of guy you want taking a swing at your baws!

Payphone Handset

When The Rock (Hollywood star Dwayne Johnson) was battling with Mankind (best selling author Mick Foley… proving wrestlers actually are intelligent at times) over the WWE Title over a decade ago, the two met in a number of brutal encounters. One such match featured The Rock bashing Mankind in the head with a payphone handset while shouting “It’s for you!”

Tennis Racket

Manager Jim Cornette was rarely seen without his patented tennis racket and his opponents were seldom left unscathed when the ‘Louisville Slugger’ had a chance to wallop them behind the referees back. I wonder if he ever hit the court to play…

Urn

The legendary Undertaker – whose gimmick was that he was thought to be undead – was often ushered to the ring by his manager Paul Bearer, who was in possession of the urn said to contain The Undertaker’s ashes. Whether this story pans out or not, the urn was definitely used on multiple occasions to batter an opponent of ‘The Deadman’ and help secure a number of victories.

Drink #96: Fire Extinguisher

Fire Extinguisher Shot

Judging by the list above, it seems as if anything can be used as a weapon in the ring. I know wrestling isn’t everyone’s cup of tea (although who drinks tea around this site anyways? Well, maybe the Long Island version), but thank you for letting me relive some memories on this special weekend for all the Hulkamaniacs out there!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
I really enjoyed this shooter. The burn of the Fireball Whiskey was quickly cooled by the creamy Bailey’s and a Cinnamon-Sugar rim is always welcomed by me. The addition of Red Hots completed the presentation wonderfully.

March 19 – PAMA-Jama

Thunder Shower

We ain’t talking about a weather system… when Mama and Papa Sip were getting hitched, their friends threw them a party where each guest brought a bottle of alcohol for the happy couple to set them up with a nice bar for the start of a new life together (marriage drives a person to alcoholism joke inserted here). Wanting to pass that tradition on, the Parents Sip planned the same party for Mrs. Sip and me, about a month prior to our wedding. This was our Thunder Shower!

Frankly, it was a wonderful break from the daily wedding planning and a chance to gauge where we were at with the guests who would soon be sharing our special day with us.

Wedding Planning

With the party being Mexican Fiesta-themed (the food included a make your own nachos, tacos and burritos bar – what can I say, Mama and Papa Sip know how to throw a good bash) we were given four bottles of tequila, as well as a couple bottles of margarita mix. Some favourites I’m known for knocking back like Fireball Whiskey, Bacardi Rum, and Smirnoff Vodka were also bequeathed to us.

There were also some new tastes to try, which I’m always happy to oblige. Cousin Sip contributed a bottle of cucumber-infused Hendricks Gin, which I have taken a particular liking to. One set of friends passed along a bottle of Jim Beam Black Cherry Bourbon, as well as a bottle of Cointreau. Mama and Papa Sip gifted us a bottle of Chocolate Whipped Vodka, which quickly became a favourite of Mrs. Sip, whose wine and champagne collection was topped up, too.

All in all, it was a wonderful evening with great food and drinks, good fun with friends and family, and the beginning of our wedding celebration summer.

Marriage

Why do I bring this event up? Well, for a number of reasons. My forum provides me with another chance to thank all of our guests for their generosity and truly show them how much we appreciated and enjoyed their gifts. Next, because I think every couple should get to enjoy a similar event and finally, because today’s drink features PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur, a bottle we received at our Thunder Shower and although we only recently opened it, the results have been thoroughly enjoyable thus far.

Drink #78: PAMA-Jama

Pama-Jama Cocktail

  • 8 Muddled Mint Leaves
  • 1.5 oz PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur
  • Top with Ginger Ale
  • Dash of Lemon Juice
  • Garnish with Lemon Wedge

This has to be one of my favourite drinks of the project to date. I wasn’t sure how much I’d like the liqueur, as I don’t have any recollection of having actually ever eaten a real pomegranate, but once again life proves that as long as alcohol is inside something, it will be enjoyed (or at least consumed). How much did I like the drink? Well, given I’m making at least 365 drinks over the next calendar year, I try not to double up too often. I ended up making three of these for myself and just had to share the recipe with Mrs. Sip. Track it down and give it a shot (literally!). You won’t be disappointed.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (5 Sips out of 5):
A fantastic drink… I can’t say enough good things about this cocktail. It was the first time I busted out my PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur and what a wonderful mix I was treated with to begin my relationship with the spirit!

March 12 – Sepultura

Grave Diggin’

In Portuguese, Sepultura means grave. And while this drink may eventually send you there, you still have time to figure out what will be written on your headstone. Here’s some things to consider:

Do you want to be remembered for your legacy?

“That’s All Folks!”
The Man of a Thousand Voices

Mel Blanc (voice of numerous Looney Tunes characters)

mel-blanc-tombstone

“The Entertainer”
He Did It All

Sammy Davis, Jr. (triple threat: actor, singer, comedian)

Do you want to tell your story?

Truth and History.
21 Men.
The Boy Bandit King–
He Died As He Lived

William H. Bonney “Billy the Kid” (legendary outlaw)

Are you hoping to deliver a lasting message?

…that nothing’s so sacred as honor and nothing’s so loyal as love

Wyatt Earp (old west lawman)

Workers of all lands unite.
The philosophers have only
interpreted the world in various ways;
the point is to change it.

Karl Marx (Communist manifestonian)

“Tomorrow is the most important thing in life.
Comes into us at midnight very clean.
It’s perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands
It hopes we’ve learned something from yesterday”

John Wayne (cowboy)

Why not crack a joke on your way out?

There goes the neighborhood

 Rodney Dangerfield (comedian)

Rodney-Dangerfield-Headstone

Jack Lemmon
in

Jack Lemmon (actor)

“I will not be right back after this message.”

Merv Griffin (talk show host/game show creator)

“I’m a writer, but then nobody’s perfect.”

Billy Wilder (movie icon)

Or, do you just want to get in the last word?

Quoth the Raven,
“Nevermore”

Edgar Allan Poe (writer)

After careful consideration, I’ve decided that my tombstone should read:

The Sip Advisor
He provided the world with endless joy
So we drink to him, eating Chips Ahoy
He was a legend, a stud, never rude
To sum up: he was one good dude!

Of course, if you have to pay per letter, I’m cool with it simply saying “C U”. Ah hell, I want to be cremated anyway, with my ashes to be sprinkled in a distillery, so I can be with my loved ones forever. Or at least until they sweep up around the place.

Drink #71: Sepultura

Sepultura Cocktail

  • 0.75 oz Absinthe
  • 0.75 oz Fireball Whiskey (or Cinnamon Schnapps)
  • 1 Beer (I used Rickard’s Red)

Take the two liquors and put them into a shot glass, drop the shooter into the beer and voila, you have a liquid grave to drown your sorrows in. Only happiness is allowed around here!

Sepultura Absinthe Beer Drink Recipe

 

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (3.5 Sips out of 5):
I used a frozen shot glass for this dropped shot cocktail, which eliminated much of the mess and clean up when the drink was done. I would like to try this recipe with other beers and see which one works best.

March 2 – Key Lime Pie

Dessertification

Truth be told, I’m not much of a pie fan (dirty jokes aside). It’s not that I don’t like pie, but I’m more of a cookie and brownie man. I thought it might be best to list some of my favourite dessert treats, in case anyone out there is looking to butter me up like the living legend that I am.

Two-Bite Brownies

While they’re advertised as two-bite treats, it’s much more enjoyable to shove the entire brownie in your mouth and chomp on it noisily. If you’re looking for a fun evening in the future, try having a brownie bash. Each player brings a bag of two-bite brownies, which are emptied out into the centre of the playing surface. Then each competitor builds up a fortress for safe keeping of their treasures and you play Hungry Hungry Hippo’s style, running and retrieving one treat at a time until all the brownies have been claimed.

Sponge Bob Two Bite Brownie

Rainbow Chips Ahoy

Nothing beats ending a long hard day with a plate of cookies and a cold glass of milk… unless it’s a fat beefy burger and an ice cold cocktail. Hell, if your guy-et is going well, why not do both! Rainbow chips Ahoy (which are clearly superior to regular chocolate chips ahoy) are one of my favourite camping supplies and you truly haven’t experienced all the joys of life until you’ve made smores between of these two cookies. As a bonus, the rainbow chips take you back to fond childhood memories quicker than the sight of an ice cream truck.

Black Forest Cake

Mrs. Sip really stole a piece of my heart when we celebrated our first dating anniversary and she bought me an entire Black Forest Cake even though she isn’t besties with any cake other than Ice Cream Cake. Yes, that black forest beauty and I spent a bulk of the next week together, sharing tender glances, romantic embraces and nights of unbridled passion.

Chocolate Fondue

The fun part about fondue (maybe they should just call it FUNdue… great, now the lame police are after me… why do I always write the worst jokes?) is coming up with interesting things to dip in the chocolate. While pedestrian items like fruit, marshmallows and sponge cake are used by the masses, I am an extreme fondue-er, dunking sub sandwiches, turkey legs, and edible underwear into the melted goodness.

Chocolate Fondue

Minnie’s Bake Shop Cookies at Disney Parks

These cookies are amazing! Every time Mrs. Sip and I are in Disneyland or Disneyworld, a good portion of our snack budget (well, budget is a loose term, given it’s an infinite amount) is spent of these treats. We’ve come home with an entire suitcase filled with the delicacies before… and it’s not like we make them last for as long as possible. They are often demolished in a single serving, as we go into a trance-like orgy of cookie destruction. The next morning, we awake to smears of chocolate and peanut on our clothing (luckily we’re still in clothing); crumbs, like fallen snow, littering the floor; and splashes of milk dripping from the ceiling.

Black Magic Cupcakes

This is Mama Sip’s world famous recipe, which has caused her to be hounded over the years by family, friends, co-workers, even da freakin’ pope, to make them. Basically, they are a chocolate cupcake with chocolate chip cheesecake mixed in and are absolutely fabulous warmed up or even cold. Made from a secret family recipe that has been handed down for thousands of years, I may have said too much already. If you would like the recipe, please send $500 to Sip Advisor Enterprises and I’ll get back to you in due time.

Drink #61: Key Lime Pie

Key Lime Pie Shot

  • Rim glass with Graham Cracker Crumbs
  • 0.5 oz Galliano
  • 0.5 oz Fireball Whiskey
  • Splash of Lime Juice
  • Dash of Milk
  • Top with Whipped Cream

There are at least three variations of this shot and I kind of put pieces together from all three to make my version. Enjoy!

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
Full disclosure: I left out an ingredient when making this shooter. Originally, I forgot to include Galliano, so I had to make it again. It worked out pretty well when done properly. The Graham Cracker Crumb rim was a key part of the recipe.

January 30 – Firestone

Yuck… I’m Not Drinking That

There are those out there who think that Fireball Whiskey (a cinnamon-flavoured liquor) is gross. To those people I scream, “What, are you crazy?” Fireball is delicious and my go-to flask filler. For those that aren’t down with the Fireball or, more accurately, aren’t balling with the fire, I suggest you reserve your criticisms for these libations:

Alaska Distillery Smoked Salmon Vodka

Salmon belongs on a plate – wonderfully cooked by Mrs. Sip Advisor – with a couple sides, not in a bottle. The makers of this vodka suggest using it in Caesar recipes and perhaps they are onto something. Unfortunately, I think most people would find it hard to get their head wrapped around the concept of drinking a fish-flavoured drink, regardless of how good it could possibly taste. Suggested recipe: Bloody Mary

Smoked Salmon Vodka

Oddka Wasabi Vodka

I don’t even like wasabi on my sushi, let alone in my vodka. This spirit seems like something you would have on a dare. Maybe I’ll gather the Sip Advisor executive board for a game of spin the bottle and we’ll see if Wasabi Vodka makes an appearance on the path to enlightenment. One thing is for sure, this liquor might make a good chaser with some sashimi… providing you’re a fan of the green stuff to begin with. Suggested recipe: Japanese Garden

Oddka Wasabi

Oddka Electricity Vodka

Looking for an easy buzz? How about some electricity-flavoured vodka? Seriosuly, though, how do you bottle the taste of electricity? Did you lick a battery and then try to match the subtle notes of death? Perhaps ol’ Ben Franklin discovered this recipe when he conducted his famous kite during a lightning storm experiment all those years ago. He is known to have invented like a bazillion things. Suggested recipe: Electricity Shot

Oddka Electricity

Three Olives Purple Vodka

Is purple even a flavour? Growing up, purple (better known as grape) was one of my least favourite candy tastes. I found it to be too hit and miss to invest my piggy bank money in and pushed more of my assets towards stocks and bonds in watermelon and strawberry essences. Although, I will admit that the attractive woman enjoying a purple popsicle in the ad for this bottle makes me want to give it a chance. Fingers crossed it doesn’t taste like children’s cough syrup. Suggested recipe: Purple Rain

Three Olives Purple

360 Buttered Popcorn Vodka

I don’t like popcorn (the real thing) because I hate getting kernels stuck in my teeth. While the flavour of this vodka intrigues me, I’m currently at a complete loss as to what this liquor could possibly be paired with to make any drinkable cocktail. In the end, I think I’d rather buy rip-off movie theatre popcorn, choke on a couple kernels and call it a day, than sample some popcorn vodka blends. Suggested recipe (by 360): Caramel Corn Collins (actually want to try this!)

360 Buttered Popcorn Vodka

Three Olives Tomato Vodka

With “Bakon” and Tomato vodkas already existing, we are so close to making BLT or Clubhouse cocktails. I hope scientists out there are trying to come up with lettuce and chicken spirits (a much better use of their time than curing cancer or fixing global warming or anything like that). Like the Smoked Salmon Vodka, this spirit is probably best suited for the Caesar/Bloody Mary family of drinks, but I’m not sure it has any prospects outside of this realm. Suggested recipe: Bloodhound Variation

Three Olives Tomato

Drink #30: Firestone

Firestone Drink

  • 1.5 oz Fireball Whiskey
  • Top with half sour mix half orange juice
  • Garnish with trio of wheels (lemon, lime, orange)

If any company out there wants to send me a sample of their spirits and prove me wrong, I would welcome them with open arms and if my mind is changed, I would happily retract any criticism I have made and advise my little sippers to give these alcohols a chance.

Sip Advisor Bar Notes (4 Sips out of 5):
What I liked best about this cocktail was the faint burn that comes through on the aftertaste, thanks to the Fireball. Using the trio of fruit wheels ended up looking pretty good, so I’m happy I went down that route.